Innocence Lost
by Ivyna J. Spyder
Summary: (Chapter 9 up! ^_^) In a twist of fate, Vivi is taken from his friends while in Burmecia. From there, he finds his life changed forever...
1. Victory for Evil

Author's note: First off, an explanation of where the hell I got the idea for this story A dream. Yes, I got this story from a very bizarre, yet cool dream I had. In the dream, well, just read the fic I had to add in stuff, of course, but the basic premise is what the dream was about Kind of. You know how dreams are! So, blame my subconscious for this fic!!!! ^_^;;; Also blame the fact I did a lot of it late at night Hmm, a dangerous combination =P Well, actually a friend and I had been talking about an idea similar to this, so that's probably why I had the dream in the first place

Rated PG-13 for mild swearing, and other bad stuff in later chapters

Innocence Lost

Part 1: Victory for Evil

* * *

As it had for ages, and probably would continue to do so for ages to come, a steady rain fell from the heavens upon the now desolate city of Burmecia. The beautiful stone statues and elegant architecture turned to ruin by the Black Mage Army which had recently raged through the streets. Only the dead and dying littered the streets, with only their eternal silence to give to anyone daring to venture towards the castle.

At the Burmecian castle, where the king and his subjects, now fled, once gathered, a battle has just been fought, and lost. Four figures lay on the ground, unconscious or struggling not to be. A teenage boy, his drenched, unkempt blonde hair dangling in front of his face, a female Burmecian dragon knight, trying to lift her battered body from the ground, a rotund member of the Qu tribe, and finally a small black mage, sprawled where he fell on the carved stone floor.

A beautiful woman with heavy curled brown hair and a band of cloth covering one eye gave them an almost disgusted glance. She sheathed her blade, and turned towards two other figures in the room.

"How pathetically weak. Isn't there anyone worthy of facing me?" she wondered aloud.

One of the others was a rather obese, oddly blue-skinned woman, who wore the fine clothing of royalty. The last person was an exceedingly effeminate young man with long tresses of silver hair, and wearing an exotic purple, white and gold outfit.

The queen turned and headed for one of the exits. "Come, Beatrix." She motioned with the fan she held in one of her chubby hands. "We must prepare to attack Cleyra."

"Yes, your majesty." Beatrix and the queen exited, leaving the man.

He approached the defeated party, his gaze traveling across each one of them. "What do we have here? Another filthy rat, and" His gaze stopped on Zidane. "Hmm this boy could become a problem." Before he turned away, his eyes fell upon the smallest member of the party, the black mage.

For a brief moment he studied the pathetic figure clad in its floppy hat and blue jacket.

"That mage there" Kuja brought one slender hand to his chin as he voiced his thoughts. "It's the prototype that I created several years ago"

A frown crossed his delicate features. "I don't remember designing the prototypes to be that powerful. Yet unless I'm mistaken, this is the little one that defeated the Waltzes, as well as the other mages we have sent to attack"

"Very interesting" Kuja dropped his hands to his sides, and strode over away from the party. "Very interesting indeed. It would also be interesting to find out just how it ended up here, of all places"

A shadow suddenly passed through the room as a winged shaped flew down from the sky. A silver dragon alighted on the stone floor, and waited for its master. He walked smoothly over to the creature, and climbed onto its feathery back. Kuja seemed to speak with the dragon a moment and it growled in affirmation. Instead of taking off, it walked to where the small mage was. Using its front legs, it carefully lifted the mage up from the floor.

"Careful now, wouldn't want to damage it." Kuja said. "I have plans for this one"

The dragon deposited the mage on its back near Kuja, and flapped its huge wings to take off. On the ground, the dragon knight was up on her elbows, watching.

"Vivi" she gasped, trying to push herself up. "No!" She struggled harder to stand, but the pain from a dozen injuries attacked at once, forcing her back down. She watched helplessly as the silver dragon flew upwards, and out of the castle.

* * *

Vivi woke up as the dragon was flying over the mountains near Burmecia.

He had expected to feel rain falling on him, to feel cold from his soaked clothing, to feel the cold stone floor beneath him, and also feel the ache of the injuries he'd sustained. Only the third expectation was met. To his surprise, he felt no rain falling, in fact it was quite warm out and his clothes felt merely damp, and instead of stone, as he looked down he saw soft, silvery feathers.

He was still several moments as his mind ran through the possibilities, trying to figure out just where he was and how he ended up there. It required more information, of course, so he brought his body into a sitting position to see more.

"Well, you're awake."

Vivi stared in shock at the silver-haired man sitting calmly on the back of the dragon. A quick glance around showed that he was on the back of something, he wasn't sure what. The main thing he could tell was what frightened him the most

They were very, _very_ high up.

Confused and scared, the little mage gripped onto the feathers of the winged beast, not sure what he was more afraid of: falling, or the fact he was with this man Kuja, who, as far as Vivi knew at that time, was not a very nice person.

Several moments passed, and Kuja didn't say anything. Vivi finally found his voice again, though he stuttered more than usual.

"Wh-why did you-"

Kuja interrupted, raising a hand for silence. "It will all be explained in time, little one. For now, I think you should get some more rest"

"What?" Vivi watched as Kuja waved his hand as he cast some sort of spell. He suddenly felt an incredible drowsiness wash over him, and was unable to keep his eyes open. The little mage collapsed, unconscious again.

"Just until we get home" he said, grinning.

* * *

At the Burmecian castle, the other two who had been defeated were finally coming to. The third, the Burmecian, stood holding her lance, her muzzled face cast downward.

The blonde boy got up shakily, his tail swishing slowly behind him as he scanned the area. His brow furrowed as he noticed something wrong. "There's Freya, and Quina something's missing." He approached the dragon knight. "Where's Vivi?"

"He was taken" she said quietly. "I was unable to stop them. Please forgive me"

The news struck him like a physical blow. "What?! Who took him? Where'd they go?" The young thief had felt like he held some responsibility for the well-being of the young mage since he met him, and now the news of his kidnapping made him realize just how much he did care for him.

"The strange man, Kuja, he took him away on a silver dragon Queen Brahne and Beatrix left as well. Zidane, I tried to stop them, but my strength was gone"

"Dammit!" Zidane cursed in frustration. "No, I'm not mad at you" he added when Freya shot him a distressed look.

Quina walked over then, wondering what they were talking about. "That was hard battle! Beatrix very strong. What is wrong now?"

"That weird looking Kuja guy took Vivi." Zidane said, his hands and teeth clenched.

The Qu's jaw dropped. "Took Vivi?! Vivi been kidnapped!" S/he shook her head, his/her long tongue waving back and forth. "That very bad! What we do??"

"I don't know We don't have a damn clue where they are Or why he was taken!" Zidane took out some of his frustration on a nearby stone, kicking it at a wall. "First Garnet goes off who-knows-where, now this"

"We need to head for Cleyra." Freya said suddenly.

"Why, was Kuja headed there?"

She shook her head, water dripping from her winged hat. "No, but Queen Brahne said they were going to attack there next."

"Just when you'd think things wouldn't get any worse" Zidane frowned. "Well, if Queen Brahne has connections with that guy, maybe it'll help us find Vivi."

"Though I am just as worried about him as you are, the lives of an entire town weigh more heavily than one." Freya pointed out.

"I know" Zidane turned to Quina, who was inspecting a statue to see if it was edible. "Quina, there's no time, let's get going!"

They hurriedly left the depressing city, heading for the desert, and the sandstorm surrounding Cleyra

End part 1

Note: Well, the dream part of it doesn't actually come until later, I had to make this part up. ^_^;;; Er, any good so far? I'm trying yet another new style of writing


	2. Captive

Innocence Lost

Part 2: Captive

* * *

Vivi didn't know how long he'd been unconscious. When he woke up again he had been hoping it had been some bad dream, but when he opened his eyes and saw his new surroundings, harsh reality set in again. He saw Kuja standing nearby, and found that the he was no longer on the dragon, but onsand? Looking around he saw more sand. Tons of it, more sand than he had ever seen in one place, in fact.

_Is this the desert near Cleyra? No I don't see that sandstorm anywhere Where is this?_

"Stand up." Kuja commanded, motioning with his hands. Vivi stood, unsure if he should try to do something about his current situation. Perhaps finding out just what it was

"Umwh-why did y-you" he stuttered.

"Why did I take you from your friends?" Kuja finished. He smiled in a way that said it couldn't be anything pleasant. "Just for a plan I thought up Nothing special, but it should take care of that boy and your other friends."

"What do you mean?"

"You'll understand, soon enough."

Nervously, he continued questioning him, trying to find out more. "D-do you work for Queen Brahne?"

"What? Me, work for that elephant woman? Nonsense. In fact, it's more like she works for me"

Vivi studied the man for a few moments. He didn't look all that powerful, in fact a casual glance would make one thing he was quite the opposite. The little mage highly doubted that was the case.

_I need to get away He might want to hurt me But how can I? And where would I go? I don't even know where this is_

Kuja saw as Vivi started looking around, searching for cover or someplace to hide. He sighed, shaking his head. "There's no use in running away. You'd never survive out here in the desert. Even if you did manage to escape, you'd either die a slow death as the heat took its toll or there is always the quicker way of wandering into an Ant Lion pit."

Vivi was silent, looking down at the sands beneath his boots. "Where are you taking me?" he asked quietly after a moment.

"My home. You might recognize it, since you've been there before"

He looked up in puzzlement, part of it from the comment Kuja had made, and a smaller part from wondering just where Kuja would live in the middle of the desert

Kuja answered by casting a spell of teleportation, warping them both down beneath the sands

Vivi suddenly found himself in a room. It was a good-sized room, though it was windowless. It was lavishly decorated, with many expensive-looking statues and such, and several piles of books. There was a bed over in a corner.

"Welcome to my humble abode." Kuja said, smiling as he looked over the room as if to make sure everything was still as he'd left it.

Vivi was silent, and turned his gaze to the floor.

Kuja smirked. "I have someplace else I'd like to show you."

"I don't want to see it" Vivi said quietly. "I want you to take me back to Zidane and the others"

"You need not worry, you'll see your friends in a very short time."

At hearing this, Vivi looked up hopefully. "I-I will?"

"Yes, I promise." He said, smiling in a not-so-honest way. Vivi noticed.

"Please tell me why you brought me here" he said, looking back down at the floor. "A-are you going to h-hurt me?"

"Enough questions. I said that you'd find out soon enough. Come with me, now. Oh, and don't think of running away here either. The defense system in my home would have no trouble dealing with you"

Vivi had never felt so frightened. He had been taken from his friends to this strange place, and worst off all he had no idea what this man had in store for him. In all honesty, he didn't _want_ to know. He wanted to somehow get away, but he doubted Kuja was bluffing about the defenses, and he didn't want to risk it.

He started sobbing quietly as he followed Kuja through a few hallways. He didn't pause to admire the beauty of the place's architecture, with it's intricate glass panes and expertly carved statues that seemed to occupy a space every few feet, and kept his gaze low. He saw Kuja stop at a door, so he waited. Kuja opened the door, and motioned for Vivi to enter.

There was a small room, much plainer and older looking than the rest of the place. It was also mostly empty, save for a table and a shelf of odd-looking instruments. He stopped walking, looking slowly through the room.

_This place it does feel like I've been here before_

"Wh-what is this place?" he asked in voice that sounded hollow to his ears.

Kuja moved behind the little mage. "You don't remember this place? No, I don't suppose you would. This is where you were created. Your birthplace', you could say."

It took a moment for Vivi to register what he had heard. "My what?"

"You were the prototype for the black mages you and your friends have fought."

His glowing eyes widened in what might have been disbelief, except Vivi found himself believing what Kuja said

_I have been here_

"I had thought you weren't much of a success. You couldn't even use any magic. But now I've seen I was mistaken. Your powers even surpass those of the Black Waltzes"

Vivi again looked down at his clasped hands, more than a little confused by all that he was being told.

_I was created, just like those other mages in Dali Those mages who destroyed Burmecia I'm confused Should I be upset? I wanted to find out what I am, where I came fromBut I didn't expect to find out like thisWhy is he telling me, anyway?_

"You were created for the same purpose as those mages." Kuja grinned down at the small mage. "You know what that purpose is, right?"

_They were created to be puppets, to destroy and kill_

"Y-yes"

_But I'm not like them I'd never hurt anyone! I'm an individual, I'm not being controlled_

"Your purpose was never fulfilled, unfortunately. I think it's about time you were returned to that original purpose."

_Returned to what does he mean?_

Realization dawned on him. "N-no!" Vivi cried, trying to turn, to escape, to do something, but Kuja quickly cast another Sleep spell on the mage.

"Time to get to work" he said and chuckled softly.

* * *

(I'm going to be summarizing game scenes, m'kay?) 

Cleyra was destroyed by Queen Brahne and the powerful Eidolons that had been extracted from the captive Garnet. Zidane, Freya and Quina were transported from the Red Rose to Alexandria where they met up with Steiner and Marcus, who had escaped from the dungeon.

The group found Dagger, and after fighting off Vorn and Thorn, met up with Queen Brahne and Beatrix. They fought the powerful general again, only to lose for the third time. Beatrix, though, upon hearing the news of Garnet's planned execution, remembers her sworn oath to protect the princess, and turns against the greedy queen. Steiner, Freya and Beatrix stay to fight off monsters sent by the two jesters, while Zidane and Dagger escape to Treno through Gargant Roo. Upon being attack by a serpentine monster, the Gargant speeds through the tunnels, and the duo ends up at Pinnacle Rocks. Dagger passes the test of Ramuh, and receives an Eidolon.

"Zidane you were going to tell me earlier What happened to Vivi?" she asked worriedly as they headed out of the rocky area.

"That bastard Kuja took him" he said sadly. "We haven't seen any traces of either of them since"

"Oh, Vivi I hope he's okay."

"Me too"

After leaving Pinnacle Rocks, they witnessed the terrible attack on Lindblum. They entered to find Alexandrian soldiers all over the decimated city They went to meet with Regent Cid in the castle.

"Princess Garnet is back!" Minister Artania exclaimed delightedly as Zidane and Dagger came over to where he and the regent stood.

"Uncle Cid!" she said, relieved to see him still alive. They told them of what had happened, and how they ended up there.

"What of that black mage, Vivi, was it? gwok" Cid asked.

"This guy named Kuja took him when we were in Burmecia." Zidane answered. "We haven't seen either of them since."

From back inside the castle, voices and the sounds of a struggle were suddenly heard.

"Hey, we got a live one here!"

"Watch out! It might attack!"

"Hey, this one's much smaller than the others."

"Ouch! Let me go! I'm not one of them!"

"Then why are you dressed like a black mage!?"

Two soldiers came out, carrying a struggling, blue-clad figure. Vivi!

Zidane's jaw dropped. Garnet gasped.

"We took an Alexandrian soldier into custody." Said one soldier.

"I just said-" Vivi tried protesting.

"Should we turn it over to Alexandria?" the other soldier asked.

Garnet turned to the regent. "Uncle Cid"

""Let him go. Master Vivi is not an Alexandrian soldier." Minister Artania said. "It's only a disguise to deceive the enemy."

"I-I see!" the soldier said in embarassment. "My apologies!" They released Vivi and rushed off. Garnet and Zidane immediately ran over to their friend.

"Vivi!" they both exclaimed.

"Vivi, what happened?! Where did he take you? Did he hurt you, because if he did, I swear I'm gonna-" Zidane asked rapidly, checking his friend okay to see if he was okay.

Vivi laughed. "It's okay Zidane. See, I'm fine. Nothing to worry about."

"But he" he said in confusion, and scratched his head. "What happened??"

"What happened?" Vivi repeated.

_What did happen? Wait, I escaped? Yeahthat's it._

"I-I escaped from him. It just took me a while to find you all and get here"

"We tried to find you, but so many things happened" Zidane shrugged, but then smiled widely. "It's good to have you back."

"I was so worried when I heard what had happened." Garnet said, hugging the little mage. "I'm so glad you're not hurt."

"Th-thanks." He said, adjusting his hat.

"Well you're okay then?" Zidane checked again, worry showing in his eyes.

"Yeah, I'm just a bit tired."

Still not quite satisfied, he shrugged and turned to speak with Cid and Dagger.

"Yes, you mentioned Kuja, didn't you?" Cid smoothed out his mustache with one of his oglop arms. "We have acquired more information about Queen Brahne. gwok That man Kuja is the weapons dealer who had been supplying her with highly advanced magic weapons."

"Supplying my mother with weapons?" Dagger repeated.

"Yes. The black mage soldiers are among these weapons." He continued. At that statement, Zidane and Dagger looked over at Vivi.

"Does that have something to do with Kuja trying to take Vivi?" Zidane wondered.

"Perhaps." The regent said and shrugged. "You may be able to find out. According to eyewitnesses in Treno, Kuja appeared from the northern sky on a silver dragon."

Away from the conversation, Vivi was looking up at Lindblum castle, though his mind was decidedly elsewhere.

_I escaped from him Kuja How did I escape? I don't remember coming back here_

Vivi was disturbed by the large gap in his memory, and he concentrated, trying to find what was missing. But nothing.

_Maybe I hit my head and forgot But why do I think I escaped?_

Vivi wandered over to a ledge overlooking the city. He saw smoke rising from areas consumed by fire, as well as huge piles of rubble where buildings once stood.

_How awful So many people must have died How could anyone be so cruel?_

_All that destruction pain death So much caused by black mages like me_

_No, not like me No Like me?_

Vivi shook his head in confusion. When he looked around the city again, his mind returned to the missing memories again. No not missing. Covered, blocked from access. He concentrated again, and remembered a few fuzzy images

The man Kuja. He could see his face clearly in his mind. He remembered seeing sand? A long hallway, a room

He tugged down on the sides of his hat as he tried to remember what had happened. Something seemed wrong Terribly, terribly wrong

_What happened? Why can't I remember?_

After several more attempts, he found he could unearth no more of the blocked images. He sighed quietly, looking out over the ledge at the city.

_Maybe I did just hit my head Maybe it was a dream. It probably isn't too important I'm back with my friends, I'm safe_

He looked back down at the city, and thought again of the black mages.

_Black mages Steiner asked why it would matter if I was like them I didn't get to answer. Even Zidane said I shouldn't worry, but I feel like it does matter. They were created to fight to hurt to kill. Am I like them? Was I created like they were, to do those things?_

He considered it for a moment.

_If I was why would it matter? I would never hurt anyone I don't want to But I was created created for the same same purpose I was created to killI was created, just like they were We're the same_

Vivi was shocked by his own thoughts. Why was he thinking such things? He never had before He didn't even know how he knew those things, which he somehow knew were true

_How do I know? I'm confused_

He had felt tired before, but it suddenly became a slight dizziness and he steadied himself against a stone wall.

"Z-Zidane?" he called weakly, his body shaking. His friend must not have him. "I-I don't feel so good"

_I was created to destroy to kill Why should I defy my reason for being?_

_No I wasn't, _I wasn't_!! I'm not like those others!_

_I can't deny it there's no point in itIt's true._

"Zidane Garnet" he cried louder, suddenly falling to his knees. He clutched the brim of his hat tighter, trying to block out the terrible thoughts filling his mind

_Kill It's my purpose, I must do so It's why I was created Like the others I must destroy I must_

"Help"

Garnet looked over to see the mage hunched over on the ground as if in great pain. "Vivi!" she exclaimed, and quickly ran over to see what was wrong. Zidane saw her leave, and also saw Vivi. He ran over with her.

"Vivi? Vivi, are you okay?" she asked, shaking him gently. He didn't respond, and only moaned quietly. "Vivi, please answer!"

"Vivi! Hey, pal, what's wrong?" Zidane asked, shoving him a little harder. "Are you hurt?" He looked at Garnet, who shrugged helplessly. "C'mon Vivi, what's wrong?!"

_Kill Must kill It's why I exist I exist to kill_

In the back of his mind, the words seemed familiar He didn't have time to dwell on it, for suddenly the horrible thoughts cutting into his mind suddenly decided to transform themselves into equally sharp physical pain. Vivi tried screaming, but could only manage a strangled sob. 

Zidane and Garnet, along with Cid and several soldiers, had no idea what was going on, nor did they know what to do.

_Kill I exist only to kill!_

_No I don'tI don't want_

"Vivi!!" Zidane shouted, trying to pick up the mage from the ground. "Dammit, what's wrong?! Vivi!"

Vivi felt another terrible pain rip through him, but this time he found he could scream.

_I exist only to kill only to kill_

_Please no I don't want to_

"Please, Vivi, what's wrong?" Garnet pleaded as tears formed in her eyes. To see him in this state and not knowing what to do

"What's wrong?" the regent asked as he hopped closer in his oglop body. "Is he hurt?"

"I don't know I don't think he's hurt But" she said, tears starting to fall down her cheeks. "Oh, what do we do?"

The others were as helpless to aid the mage as she was.

_I exist only to kill I exist only to kill I must do what I was destined to do There is no other way_

_No no no oh please no_

As they watched, Vivi screamed again as he felt something similar to two hot pokers jabbed into his back. There was suddenly there was a sound of tearing fabric as something tore through his jacket on his back. It looked like some dark black mist, and they swirled up, forming into two solid shapes.

"What the hell?!" Zidane exclaimed. "What are?"

After a moment, the nature of the things became known as they saw the light reflect over dozens of bluish-black feathers

"Wings?" he said in confusion. "What the hell is going on?!"

_Only to kill No other way!_

_This isn't right This isn't Oh please no _**What's happening to me****_?!?!_**

Vivi was suddenly silent, the newly formed wings folded near his body.

"They look like those wings the Black Waltzes had." Zidane added a few moments later.

_I exist only to kill_

_I don't want to hurt anyone Pl.e..a n_

Cautiously, one of the soldiers approached Vivi, who still hadn't moved or made any sounds.

"Is he okay?" Garnet asked quietly.

"Something doesn't seem right" Zidane shook his head. "Cid, tell your guy to get away from him."

"gwok What? How come?" Cid questioned.

"Hey, kid." The soldier nudged the mage with the spear he carried. After a moment, he scratched his head, and turned towards them, shrugging. "It looks like he's breathing, but-"

His sentence was cut off as Vivi's hand suddenly shot out, grabbing onto the spear.

"What the hell?!" the guard exclaimed, releasing the spear and jerking back.

"Vivi!" Garnet shouted, but the mage didn't even twitch at the sound of his name. Instead he slowly rose to his feet, brushing off the front of his jacket as he normally did, though they weren't able to see his face as the brim of his hat blocked it. He held the spear in his other hand. After a moment he tossed it one side.

"Hey Vivi, can you hear us?" Zidane waved his arms as he tried getting his attention.

"I hear you." Came his voice, so quietly he could barely hear it.

Garnet began to go over to the little mage, but Zidane put out his hand, shaking his head. "I think something's wrong"

"What?" she asked, her hands clasped in front of her.

"Just wait a sec" Zidane said, and approached the mage, who now had his attention focused on the guard. "Vivi, you okay?"

"I'm _fine, _like I said before. _Stop_ asking!"

Zidane stopped dead in his tracks. He had _never_ heard that tone in Vivi's voice before, and it sent a small chill through him. Something _was_ wrong

_Destroy kill_

_Why did I ever not want to?_

_That guard_

"U-um" the guard started to back away from Vivi. "There's something weird about" His eyes suddenly went wide. Zidane looked at Vivi to see he had his hands clasped in front of him, like he was casting a spell?

Zidane felt his hair stand on end as a sudden electrical charge filled the surrounding air. He heard a sharp crackling sound, and turned in time to see a brilliant flash.

The guard screamed in agony as a powerful Thundaga spell ripped through his body, the electricity of the spell charring his clothing and flesh within seconds. Everyone watching had to shield their eyes, half from the brilliant light created by it, and half to block out the sight of the guard being electrocuted to death

Seconds later, the spell dissipated. The guard, or rather what was left, slumped to the ground, plumes of smoke rising from the grisly corpse.

All that had seen: the regent, Garnet, Zidane, and the gathered soldiers, stood motionless. Garnet had her hands clasped over her mouth, slowly shaking her head as if to deny what she had just seen. Zidane had fallen backwards, and slowly stood, keeping his eyes on the mage. 

Vivi slowly turned towards them, and they saw his face. His normally round, bright yellow eyes were no more, instead replaced with slanted eyes of a murderous red

End part 2

Note: Egads I've never written anything like that before 0_o I dunno if it's a good thing or a bad thing ^_^;;; 

Yeah, this is what happened in the dream Particularly that one scene Oh, I drew a pic to go along with it [http://www.geocities.com/ivynajspyder/viviwaltz.jpg][1]

There's still more, unless I get many people screaming at me to knock it off ^_^;;;

   [1]: http://www.geocities.com/ivynajspyder/viviwaltz.jpg



	3. Turmoil

**Innocence Lost**

**Part 3: Turmoil**

* * *

No one moved. No one could even believe what they had seen.

"Oh oh god" Dagger choked as the sickening smell of the guard's charred flesh reached where they were standing. 

Zidane could only gape in disbelief as the mage watched them from under the brim of his hat. His mind just could not connect the shy, sweet child to whatever this was that had just brutally killed the guard. Nor could he comprehend what force could have so suddenly and completely changed his friend

Vivi looked over at the corpse.

_What happened?_

_What did I?_

__

_No _

_I didn't_

_Please no_

He slowly took a step back, his eyes clouded with confusion.

_ I killed him. I I killed someone. For no reason I just_

_I exist to kill, it's my purpose_

_No_

_I exist only to kill_

_No_

**_NO! I DON'T!!!!_**

In a bright flash, the crimson of his eyes suddenly became yellow again, and they looked in horror at the guard.

_What have I done?_

Vivi couldn't breathe. He couldn't move, he couldn't think about anything except for what he had done.

He had killed before, but in all those cases it was in self-defense, against some creature or person whose only intent was on killing him and his friends. He hadn't a choice then. He never got used to it, and he felt as though he never would.

But now he had done the one thing he thought he would never do. In truth, the thought to do something so horrendous had never even crossed his mind before that day.

Vivi brought his hands up to his face, and saw that they were trembling. His whole body was.

_I killed someone_

_I exist to kill? Why? Why do I think that?_

_What's wrong with me?! What happened to me?!_

Vivi was afraid. He had been before, but the cause this time made it worse. He found himself afraid of his own thoughts; he wondered if they were his own any longer. He didn't know.

_Did I do it intentionally?_

_It wasn't an accident_

_It couldn't have been_

_Did I want to do it?_

Cid was the first to overcome his initial shock. "Guards! Quickly, seize him before he casts another spell!"

"Uncle Cid, wait!" Dagger cried as several soldiers rushed at the mage.

"I'm sorry Garnet, but he just killed one of my men!"

"Wait!" Zidane shouted, jumping out in front of Vivi. The soldiers stopped short, but kept their weapons readied.

"Zidane, step away! He may be dangerous! gwok!" Cid exclaimed.

"You aren't touching him!" He quickly spun around towards Vivi. The mage had his hands covering his face, and Zidane could see his body shaking. "Vivi?"

He looked up slightly, uncovering his face. "Z-Zidane?" he said quietly.

"I'm right here." Zidane stepped in front of him, kneeling down to eye level. He knew somehow that he had nothing to fear from Vivi. All traces of malice had vanished from his voice, and looking closely he could see his eyes returned to their amber glow. He debated for a moment whether or not he should ask why Vivi had killed the guard, but he concluded from Vivi's manner that he didn't know either He figured it must have had to do with the scene earlier, though at that moment he wasn't sure what. He asked instead, "Are you alright?"

Vivi didn't answer, and looked over as two other guards came and spread a sheet over the deceased. "Zidane I killed him" he said, barely audible. "I took a life I don't know what happened to me"

""

"I want to say I'm sorry But that's only if it was an accident" he said, though it was mostly to himself. He had his arms wrapped around himself, and looked down at the ground, not wanting to see his friend's face.

_What are they going to think? Are they angry? Afraid?_

_Maybe they're just confused._

_I wouldn't blame them_

"It was an accident, wasn't it?" Zidane said hopefully. It hadn't seemed like an accident, he had seen Vivi cast the spell at the guard, but he still refused to accept it.

_It wasn't I did it intentionally, didn't I_

"No Zidane"

_I wanted to I remember thinking about it_

_Why did I want to?_

_What's wrong with me?_

"Something's wrong with me I don't know what it is" Zidane waited several moments, but the mage stayed silent after that.

Zidane looked over at the others as he slowly stood. "It's okay" he assured, though he knew it wasn't. He wished he could answer Vivi's question, but a solution eluded him as well.

"No, it's not It's not okay!" Vivi suddenly shouted, throwing his arms down. "Zidane I _wanted_ to do it! I don't know why, but I wanted to"

"That can't be true!" Zidane said forcefully. "You'd never want to hurt anyone. That's just not like you."

"Dammit, stop denying it, you _saw_ what I did!" he screamed, causing Zidane to step back in surprise. "You're too nice sometimes, Zidane"

Zidane finally realized that nothing he said would help the little mage. Nothing anyone could say would. In killing the guard, Vivi felt as if he'd lost an important part of himself, and he knew he'd never be able to replace it

Dagger and Cid approached the two, though cautiously. The guards still had their weapons trained on Vivi.

"Uncle Cid" Dagger looked down at the regent. "Please don't make them attack Vivi."

"I only will if he poses a threat. I know he's your friend, but"

"I understand."

"gwok What happened?" Cid questioned Zidane, his tone halfway between worry and anger.

Zidane shook his head sadly. "I don't know But I have a pretty strong feeling this has something to do with Kuja taking him." 

_Kuja I must not have escaped What did he do to me? Or was this even something he did?_

Vivi heard his friends begin speaking to each other, maybe even to him, but he wasn't listening. He didn't want to. For the moment he retreated to his own thoughts, twisted as they had become

_Zidane said he said I didn't mean to I know I did._

_I thought how I wanted to_

_How I had to_

_I exist to kill_

_Why am I thinking these things? Are they even my thoughts? _

_What if they are?_

"Vivi?" Dagger said softly, touching him on the shoulder to get his attention. She found her eyes kept wandering over to the black wings that had appeared on his back. Though the iridescent feathers were oddly beautiful, they seemed terribly out of place there, looming over his back like dark clouds.

After a moment, he looked over at her, still trying to avoid eye contact. "You all shouldn't be so close to me"

He started worrying that in his present state, he would be suddenly unable to control his actions as before; though at the same time he wondered if he had been in control at all.

_I exist to kill My purpose_

_It's not I'm not a puppet_

_Not like those others_

_I'm worse_

_I'm the one in control of this some part of me_

His panic started rising, slowly. It was as if these thoughts had _always_ been there, buried in his deep within his subconscious. Vivi, who would never dream of hurting anyone, wondered if all his life this bloodthirsty part of himself had been hiding, to emerge now and dominate the rest of his mind

"What do you mean?" she asked. "Vivi, we're we're not angry at you. We're worried"

"You should be angry"

"Well, you aren't always supposed to do what you should." Zidane said.

"I _killed_ someone" he said again, his voice cracking slightly. "There's something wrong with me" In an almost unconscious move, his hands moved up to the brim of his hat to adjust it, but his hands brushed against the wings on his back. He had hardly noticed them until that point.

Vivi extended the new appendages out to his sides, studying them in a mixture of awe and what might have been abhorrence. They weren't supposed to be there, but yet they were.

_It seems right My thoughts are all wrong, and so is my body_

He started shaking again.

"Please you need to get away" he pleaded.

_What if I can't control this part of me?_

_If it is a part of me Or something else_

_It was so easy to kill him I could do the same to all of them_

_But they're my friends, I can't!_

_No, I can Just a spell or two It would be over so quickly_

_I can but I won't. I won't_

_I won't become that way_

"Vivi, we want to help you We can try to undo whatever that had been done to you." Dagger said.

"Kuja has to have something to do with this." Zidane said again, clenching his fists. "I'm sure of it."

"Dagger Zidane I'm scared" Vivi looked up at them, this time meeting both their eyes in turn.

"You don't need to be, child. gwok" Cid hopped closer. "I understand that some outer influence may have made you do what you did You will not be punished for it."

Vivi shook his head in frustration. "N-no, that's not what I'm afraid of"

"What is it?" Dagger asked. She reached out to maybe pull him closer, to comfort him in some way, but he drew back quickly.

_I could kill her She's weak, it would be so easy She has no way to defend herself_

_No no oh please no stop it stop thinking that I WON'T hurt my friends!_

"No, don't!" he cried. "That's what I'm afraid of Th-there's something wrong with me with my mind, I don't know what it is I-I"

"Vivi, maybe if you tell us what's wrong, we can help." Zidane also tried to move closer, but stopped when he saw how distressed Vivi was starting to become.

He was silent several moments. "I-I keep thinking these things I've never thought of them before. They're b-bad things"

_I exist only to kill My purpose My fate_

_No_

"I keep thinking" He grew silent again.

_They'll be upset They'll be afraid of me_

_But maybe they should be_

"I should that I should" He could hardly continue. Vivi almost felt that if he voiced the thoughts, they would become true, and that he may act on them as he had before

_They are true_

_Are they?_

_I don't know._

"Y-you just need to stay away I might try to hurt you" he finally managed to say.

_I was created to kill _

_No_

_My purpose. I need to accept it eventually_

_I don't want to_

_But it's so hard to keep fighting it_

_I need to_

"Vivi, you won't try to hurt us." Dagger said sadly, reaching out again to him. "You'd never-"

In a sudden burst of anger, Vivi swiped out, knocking her hand away. He started backing away from them, but succeeded only in stumbling backward and falling.

"You d-don't understand! I _want_ to hurt you!! Some part of me, I don't know what it's saying it's why I exist, that I was created to kill It's trying to make me do those things Butmaybe this is how I've always been, I just didn't know it"

_If I don't do what I was created to do, what other purpose do I have?_

_I have no place in this world I've always known it._

He made no move to get up from the ground, and instead drew his knees up to his chest, wrapping his arms around them. The dark wings came around from his back, also covering him. He whimpered softly as the thoughts started gaining power, slowly taking precedence in his mind. He fought them, not wanting that part to gain control.

_I exist to kill_

_I have killed_

_What's to stop me from doing it again?_

_I can't stand it I don't want to be this way_

Vivi couldn't decide which would be worse. Surrendering to the thoughts, which while not the best choice, would be the simplest, or just living the rest of his life fighting them back, denying what he was beginning to accept as truth

How was he supposed to fight himself?

"Zidane, what are we supposed to do?" Dagger asked, turning towards him. "This is terrible "

"I'll tell you what we do." He almost growled the words. "We find Kuja, we beat him within an _inch_ of his life, and then find out what he did to Vivi and how to reverse it. That's what we do"

"We'd need to find him, first." The princess beside him said grimly. "We don't even know where to start"

"Actually, we do have an idea." Minister Artania approached the two. "We had said witnesses saw Kuja coming from the north, which suggests he is from the Outer Continent."

"The Outer Continent?" Dagger repeated, having never heard of such a place, probably due to her sheltered life as a princess.

"There are many unexplored continents in the world." Zidane explained, keeping an eye on Vivi. The mage hadn't moved, he noted worriedly. "The Outer Continent is an unexplored continent located to the north of our Mist Continent."

"I believe Kuja is the only one supplying gwok Brahne with weapons." Cid added.

Zidane gave a humorless laugh. "So, if we find this Kuja guy, we kill two birds with one stone. We cut off Brahne's weapon supply, and we get Vivi back to normal."

"And if she loses her weapon supply, that will be our time to counterattack."

"Challenging Brahne now would only result in more casualties." Artania said.

Zidane nodded. "So we crush the source of the evil."

"Yes. Kuja will find other clients, even if we defeat Brahne."

"I make no excuses for my mother's behavior, but I shan't forgive Kuja for taking advantage of her!" Dagger said angrily, and added in a morose tone, "Or what he did to Vivi, if he is truly the one responsible But first, we must rescue Steiner and the others..."

The regent shook his skull-like oglop head apologetically. "I'm afraid I can't spare any soldiers. They must remain to protect our citizens."

"Hey, Dagger. I'm telling you, they'll be fine." Zidane assured her. "The best dragon knight of Burmecia, the female general of Alexandria, and Rusty... How could they lose? Besides, you'll have me to protect you." 

She nodded after a moment. "Then I'll look for Kuja. But What about Vivi?"

They each looked over at him. The now winged mage still hadn't made any move, which unsettled them slightly.

"I'm not sure" Zidane said, bringing his hand up to his chin as he thought. "But it would make sense to bring him with us for when we find Kuja."

Vivi looked up at them. He could hear their conversation just fine, and worried about Zidane's decision

_Then again, if I stay here, I'd have this entire city at my mercy_

_Or maybe I want that Or some part of me does_

They quickly discussed just how they would get to the Outer Continent. Upon learning that there were no airships or boats they could take, Cid informed them of an excavation site in a nearby marsh.

"Will this cave lead to the Outer Continent?" Dagger asked.

Zidane folded his arms across his chest. "Doesn't sound too reliable... Are you sure?"

The regent shrugged. "Gwok I'm not sure..."

He sighed. "I guess we'll find out. Not knowing is half of the fun, huh?" He frowned, feeling guilty for being even trying to sound cheerful, but at the same time perhaps someone needed to be. He turned back to face Vivi. "Hey Vivi, you up for a trip?"

"I don't know"

"I don't know why you're so worried." Zidane said, fulfilling his role as the group's optimist. "These thoughts about you existing to kill', it's a bunch of crap. You know better."

_Bit they're true. I know they are. No matter what I want them to be_

"Zidane, I think you forgot what I just did" Vivi said bitterly.

"No, I didn't forget But I know that the Vivi I know wouldn't have done that for no reason. Something's making you do this, and I intend to help you out."

"I know, but" He looked away. "You just don't understand"

Now Zidane shrugged. "Probably not but I still have to try to help."

_Why is he being so kind to me? Zidane You're such a good friend_

_My purpose is to kill He knows thateven though he won't accept it. I'm like those other mages_

_Yet he's still being nice_

_Fool._

_I exist_

_No_

Again Vivi felt the way he had before, with dizziness accompanying the destructive thoughts invading his mind. He wanted to call out to Zidane and Dagger to warn them, but he couldn't focus his thoughts enough to do even that.

_My purpose_

_They didn't listen Why didn't they?_

_Only to_

_I'm sorry It shouldn't hurt much, Zidane_

"Kill" he whispered.

Zidane suddenly got the same feeling he had before, and slowed as he walked towards Vivi. The mage raised his head slightly, and Zidane could see a faint glow from beneath the floppy hat.

The glow was red.

"Shit" he hissed, backing away.

"What is it?" Dagger asked.

Zidane didn't answer, and watched as Vivi stood again. He extended his wings their full length, flapping them once experimentally. The guards again readied their weapons.

"Just wait a second." Zidane said, holding his hand out.

"Oh no" Dagger gasped as Vivi looked over at them, his eyes again like two smoldering coals in the pitch black beneath his hat. "Vivi, don't!"

"I exist only to kill"

"W-what?" Zidane shook his head in confusion. "Vivi, snap out of it-"

"Silence!" the mage snapped angrily. Then his voice took on an almost sad tone. "Zidane, I tried warning you You didn't listen. I'm sorry, Zidane"

"Sorry for what? Vivi, you need to stop this! Is something controlling you? Dammit, are you even Vivi?!"

Vivi laughed. While Zidane had never actually heard him laugh before, he was sure that was _not_ how it was supposed to sound. It was cruel, mocking.

"No, I'm in control. I'm still Vivi But you don't understand..."

"Understand what?" Garnet asked, stepping forward slightly.

"I told you. Why I was created All of those things I wanted to know, now I do. But you know why, too" He waited, but they didn't say anything. "Same as those other mages. I was created for the same purpose. And I need to accept it"

_Only to kill_

_No?_

_Maybe I shouldn't fight it It's true. Why deny truth? It was why I was created_

_But I don't want to hurt my friends_

"I exist to kill" he finished.

Zidane saw him bring up his hands to cast a spell. In an instant he darted forth, taking him by surprise as he tackled him to the ground. Though physically Vivi was rather weak, he still managed to leave several painful bruises on the older boy's arms as he struggled to get back up. Seconds later, Zidane saw the error of his move. Simply pinning him down would not prevent him from using magic. He leapt nimbly away as a smaller blast of flame shot past him.

_No not Zidane, I won't hurt him Not my friends, please not my friends_

_I exist to kill_

_NO!_

He found that as before, his sudden surge of emotion was enough to let him break free, and his eyes flashed again back to yellow as the milder part of him gained control.

_I'm losing control_

_Over what, though?_

_I still don't know_

"Zidane!" he cried, wanting to run over to see if he had hurt his friend at all.

_I want to have hurt him, don't I?_

He couldn't, though, for a ring of guards had formed between him and the others.

"gwok Get back, all of you!" Cid shouted, hopping onto the back of his chair. "He's too strong!"

"Wait!" Dagger exclaimed, pointing. "His eyes!"

"I think he's okay again." Zidane said, standing from where he had fallen. He rubbed a sore spot on his arm. "At least I hope he is"

_He's okay I didn't hurt him badly_

_I'm failing my purpose_

_No I won't hurt my friends. I don't want to hurt anyone!_

"Zidane Dagger I can't go with you." Vivi backed away when either of them tried to step closer. "I might try and hurt you, or worse You can't trust me. This part of me I don't know how much longer I can control it"

"Part of you?" Zidane repeated. "What do you mean? Vivi, just ignore it!"

"I-I can't I-I'm not sure I think these thoughts are my own, but they've just been hiding" He looked down slightly. "It's not that easy to ignore your own thoughts"

"No way, Vivi, I wouldn't believe for a second that you'd have a single violent bone in your body. I'm telling you, Kuja did this. He- I don't know- brainwashed you or something!"

"Kuja I think I remember him taking me somewhere." Vivi said, the blurry images flashing through his mind.

"That just proves my theory."

"Maybe But all these things, I know they're true. I don't know how, but I do. I was worried in Dali about whether I was like those other mages And in some ways I am. I was created as to be a weapon, just like them. Like the Black Waltzes too" He looked to his side at one of the wings, absently stroking the indigo feathers with a gloved hand. Suddenly, with a sharp tug he pulled out a few of them, wincing at the slight pain. "And I don't know how long I can keep denying it It's getting harder to control I want to do these things, but I don't" He released his hold on the feathers and watched as a slight breeze carried them away and out of sight.

"That's why we want to help Listen, if we find Kuja, maybe he can-" Zidane began to say.

"Zidane!" he said sharply, cutting him off. "What if Kuja didn't do this? Or what if this is something that can't be undone?"

"We still need to try."

_He's right_

"I know But I can't go with you. Like I said I can't keep fighting it." He swallowed hard, feeling a lump growing in his throat. He fought it and tears back. He couldn't cry now. "Sooner or later I think that part of me will win And I don't want to hurt you Not my friends"

"Damn" Zidane looked down at Cid for a moment. "Cid, could he possibly stay here?"

He shook his head. "I'm sorry, but I couldn't allow that. For one, there is the risk of my people's safety gwok And there is also the risk of his. If anyone were to find out we had a black mage here, well considering their current mindset on that matter gwok"

"I understand." The boy frowned, his tail swishing in agitation. He always went out of his way to help people, but in this situation it seemed the person was afraid to be helped. Vivi just didn't want to hurt his friends That fact alone convinced him that he could be helped, that somehow what had been done could be reversed.

He just needed his cooperation.

"Vivi, you're coming with us, and that's final. It may not be safe for us, but we're getting used to facing danger." Zidane tried to smile, but the look Vivi gave him quickly erased it.

"No." he said, backing away until he hit the stone railing outside the balcony. "I know you're trying to be nice But I don't want you to be killed for it!"

_I exist to kill to destroy Why keep fighting it? I can't forever_

_It keeps getting harder_

_I want to hurt them But I don't_

He looked behind him, over the stones. The city, many of the flames having died down, was far below.

_It's really far down, isn't it?_

_Nothing could survive that fall._

_Nothing._

He turned, grasping the top of the short stone wall.

_I may not be able to fight it much longer_

_But I can't hurt anyone if I'm_

"Stop! Vivi, stop!" Zidane shouted as the mage tried hauling himself to the top of the wall. He ran. He was already too late, but he ran.

"Vivi!" Dagger cried, watching in horror as Vivi climbed to the top, and stood.

_Is this what I should do?_

_I can't keep going on like this_

_I'll lose one of these days I couldn't live with myself if I killed one of my friends_

_Just end it now._

He fell.

Zidane arrived a split second later, reaching over the edge, trying to grab for something, anything

There was only air.

"VIVI!!!"

Author's Note: evil grin Sorry, just had to end this chapter there. There'll be more chapters, of course 

Also, no, Vivi does not have split personality or schizophrenia or anything like that. It's a bit harder to explain, but it'll probably be explained later And yes I know it's confusing, but it's supposed to be! Yes, be confused, be very confused

Oh, and I know Vivi trying to commit suicide may seem a bit odd, but it makes sense to me. I mean, come on, it's Vivi, and he suddenly finds himself wanting to kill everyone, so he's really not thinking straight to begin with, and he makes a rather sudden decision ::shrug:: Well, it makes sense to me


	4. Dreams and Travels

BIG ol' Note: Okay, thank you so much to the people who gave nice reviews and all. You've given me confidence to continue. ^_^ Of course, I can't repay you with some decent chapters See, I realized that, by altering something during the game, in order to continue it I'd pretty much have to re-write parts of the game. (Which is mostly what these next two chapters are!) Not much really happens until part 7! _ I know I could have just said 'And so they traveled to the Outer Continent where they found Kuja and- etc etc' but wouldn't that sound rushed? I thought it would... So, to explain this, well, I was experimenting to see how Vivi's situation in the game could be complicated further by the addition of the fact he now wants to kill his friends. ^_^;; I liked how some parts turned out, but some parts really didn't. But it was an experiment, so Um please go easy on me. ^_^;;;

Er, if you wanna see Vivi go psycho again... he doesn't until like part 6, sorry to disappoint you. ^_^ (Dang it, I shoulda' kept the part where he goes psycho and kills people in Lindblum! Why did I change it...? Oh yeah, it complicated things more than I wanted... ::sigh:: Yeah, in my original dream Vivi kills Zidane, but I sure as heck didn't wanna mess up the plot that much!!!! 0_o )

Oh yes, and SPECIAL thanks to: My IRL friend Blacklight, for helping me with ideas. My friend Ram-chan, for also helping with ideas, and with explaining my insane rantings so they made sense to me. ^_^ And also my other IRL friend, Katie, for reading my fics over to see if they made sense. =)

****

**Innocence Lost**

**Part 4: Dreams and Travels**

* * *

__

__

_Is this going to hurt at all?_

_I'd deserve it though I killed that man_

_I wanted to_

__

_Zidane Dagger I'm sorry But it's better this than either of you being killed_

__

_What if what if this can be undone?_

__

_Would it matter? I've already killed someone_

_Could I live with myself after doing that?_

_Maybe_

_But_

_It's too late now anyway_

He had his eyes closed. He didn't know how long he'd been falling. Maybe a few seconds, maybe longer, he didn't care.

_My purpose is for warto killto destroy That's why I was created._

_I can accept it. It's true. No matter what I want it to be, that was why I was created._

_But now it doesn't matter, does it?_

_I want to hurt people_

_But now I won't be able to_

_Even though I may have been able to stop thinking this way?_

_I don't even know why I'm thinking this way_

_I sound just like the third Black Waltz I exist only to kill_

_That's what part of me wants to believe, anyway._

_But I really don't_

_My friends are going to be so sad But it's better than them being dead_

__

_Zidane Dagger Steiner Freya Even Quina_

The thought of the Qu brought forth a similar figure in his memory

_Grandpa_

_I miss you_

_If it weren't for you, I wonder what would've happened to me?_

_You worked hard to raise me. And look what happened_

_I'm sorry I let you down_

_No_

_What if this can be undone? What if this is a mistake? What if I die for nothing?_

_But it's too late_

_No_

_No it's not!_

_!_

His eyes flashed open. The city was considerably closer, but plenty far enough for his phobia of heights to kick in. But there was still time.

_I won't I can't give up Not yet!_

Vivi had kept the dark wings close to his body before, but now he found the hated things might help him correct his error

In a single motion they snapped outwards to their full span, the blue feathers fluttering about wildly. Vivi almost had the breath knocked out of him as the wind jerked him sharply upwards several yards. He tried flapping the wings to gain altitude, but he found his lack of experience in the matter hindered the attempt. So he just tried to slow his fall as he continued gliding downward to the city.

_I'll just go back in the castle Then I can go with Zidane and Dagger, and we'll find out what happened to me And how I can be normal again_

He felt hopeful the first time that day. It was a nice feeling.

The ground was soon much closer, and he could see people clearly. The mage could also see that some of them were looking straight up at him, pointing. 

_I shouldn't land there_

Vivi tried turning towards the castle, but unfortunately, since he had no idea just how to do so, he ended up dipping his left wing too low and was sent tumbling through the air. He worried briefly that he would hit the ground before he could right himself, but perhaps fate was with him.

Or against him, he would never be sure.

He landed on something soft and yielding. After waiting for his heart to slow down a bit, he looked down to see he had been saved from a nasty fall by a tarp stretched for shade between four poles. But Vivi's relief turned to worry as the people below started to gather closer. Many of them had bandaged injuries from the earlier attack.

"What is that?"

"It looks like"

"Oh my god, it's another black mage!!"

This exclamation caused a tremendous uproar, with some people leaving altogether while others came to see what the commotion was about. People started shouting, and he couldn't make out any individual comments, though occasional shouts of kill it' and bastard' would separate themselves from the din.

Vivi tried to stand, hoping he could fly somewhere safer, but froze when he heard the sound of the fabric beneath him tearing. It gave way and he fell through, landing roughly on the stone street. He was unharmed and stood up shakily, brushing himself off as he always would.

He saw he was by what was left of some souvenir stands, whatever they had been selling crushed under rubble from a toppled building nearby. Around him, people stood in horror to see another one of the creatures that had caused the destruction. They had stopped their shouting, fearing now it would attack.

Vivi heard something whimper behind him. Looking back, he saw a small girl trying to hide behind a smashed crate. Her dark hair was disheveled and her face and arms were covered with bandaged cuts.

"Please don't hurt me" she cried. "Please"

Vivi shook his head, wanting to say that he wouldn't, that he'd never hurt anyone

_But I would And I have I'd be lying._

_I need to get away I'm not welcome here_

"Hey, it's going after that girl!" He heard a shout behind him.

"Someone stop it before it attacks!"

Vivi looked back to see the people, who were still warily keeping their distance. Though they were angry, they had seen what the mages could do.

_But they're right to be afraid _

_I need to get away before anyone gets hurt._

_I was created to kill_

_I accepted it_

_I want to do what I was meant to_

Vivi cringed slightly. The thoughts had been silent before, and now they began rising up in the back of his mind. He braced himself, thinking of what could happen if he lost control there, with all those people around him.

_I can't I can't hurt them_

_No I won't I don't want to_

_I exist to kill, they should be killed It is my purpose, as it is theirs to die_

_It's not I don't want to hurt anyone_

_I don't care if that was why I was created_

_If I don't do what I was created to, what other purpose do I have to exist?_

_What makes me think that was why I was created?_

As soon as the thought crossed his mind, it was joined by the memory of the black mages he had fought in Gizamaluke and Burmecia. It wasn't something he wanted to think about much. Vivi had had no choice but to battle those others, but he had felt something akin to guilt afterwards.

_I wondered if I was like them I felt I was, in some way, even if it was only the way we looked... That's why I was upset_

_But am I truly the same as them, in other ways? I'm not some mindless puppet like they were, but_

_We are the same also in that we were created for the same reason butIt doesn't mean I have to do that_

_But I want to. Some part of me does_

_I've always felt like I didn't belong That I didn't have a purpose_

_Now I've found it, so why am I fighting it?_

_I exist to kill_

_I don't care! I don't want to hurt anyone else!!!_

The people in the crowd exchanged glances, waiting nervously for the mage to do something. It was just standing there, though.

"I say we just kill the damn thing and get it over with!" came a harsh voice.

"Maybe we should take it to the castle" another said.

"Screw that, those damned things killed my only daughter!!" 

Vivi didn't hear anything they were saying, and if he did it just didn't register; the two sides' of his mind were in a heated argument, which Vivi wasn't quite sure he was in full control of.

_I exist to kill Why am I fighting it?!_

_I don't want to hurt anyone._

_Yes I do I just don't want to accept it._

Vivi narrowed his eyes, feeling almost angry at the strange thoughts; he felt they had no right to be in his mind.

_I act as if these thoughts aren't mine They are, though. It's how I've always been_

_No, that isn't true I haven't even known these things until now!_

"Someone do something!" a woman shouted. "Before it attacks!"

"It's not moving" another person commented.

"Who cares?!" a man who had lost his daughter exclaimed. "These things destroyed our lives!" Suddenly, the man hurled a piece of rubble at the mage, hitting him on the side. The pain shook Vivi from his thoughts, and he looked up at them in confusion.

"You idiot! Now it's going to attack!"

"Not if we attack first!" he countered, throwing another rock which narrowly missed.

Their rage making them forget the possible danger of the situation, the first man as well as several others began throwing whatever debris they could find at the mage.

Vivi, taken unaware by the onslaught, could only try to shield himself, spreading the wings in front of him.

_These fools They're attacking me, I should just destroy them all!_

_They're just angry because of what happened I can't blame them, but I can't attack them I need to get away_

Vivi tried moving away, crying out as a larger rock struck him hard on his left wing. The entire limb went numb and he dropped it to his side, no longer able to hold it up. He tried running, but the crowd had moved in, trapping him.

_I need to get away_

_I should attack them_

_No, I won't There are too many, anyway_

He didn't notice that behind him, the first man to strike him was approaching, wielding a broken wooden pole. 

"Kill it!" someone else shouted. Vivi sensed someone behind him, but before he could turn the man struck him across his head. Pain exploded through his skull, lights dancing across his vision before everything went dark.

* * *

__

__

_?_

Vivi opened his eyes to find himself in the guestroom at Lindblum Grand Castle. Light streamed in through a window above him, and birds chirped softly at the windowsill.

The mage blinked several times, and rubbed his eyes. His mind raced, trying to understand how his situation could have changed so dramatically. Remembering, he gasped, then reached around to feel his back.

There was nothing there. Not even tears in the fabric of his jacket. It was as if the wings had never even been there.

Vivi felt like laughing and crying at the same time. It had all been a dream! It hardly seemed possibly, but he wasn't one to argue with it. He eagerly leapt from the bed, wanting to go tell his friends what a bizarre and rather frightening dream he had had

That's when he saw the occupant of the bed next to his.

He felt as if his heart, in fact as if the entire world had simply stopped in that moment.

The figure that sat on the other bed, watching him as if amused was himself. Yet not quite. It looked like him in most ways, excluding the dark blue wings on his back, and the glittering red eyes peering out at him

Vivi shook his head slowly, not grasping what was going on. What had happened?

The other him tilted his head to one side, as if curious. "Something bothering you?" His voice was nearly the same as Vivi's own, except different. The only way Vivi could think of to describe it was that it was just _wrong_.

Now the winged version of himself chuckled. "No, I should say, is there something bothering me?"

"W-who are you? Where is this?" Vivi asked in puzzlement. "I don't understand"

"Yes I do."

"What?"

"I said I don't understand, but I do."

Vivi shook his head again, still not getting what was taking place. "Why are you talking like that?! Who are you?!"

The other Vivi's eyes got a strange look to them, one that could best be described as a grin. "I'm who I am. I'm you. You're me. We're the same being. And this" He gestured at the room around them. "Is my mind. Well, an image created from my memories, anyway."

"You're not me I'm me."

"You don't get it, do you?" the other him said exasperatedly, finally addressing him as someone else. "_We_ are the _same person_. This is your mind, I am but a single aspect of your thoughts given form. But as _part_ of you, I essentially _am_ you."

Vivi was silent for a moment. "It wasn't a dream, was it"

"What wasn't? Oh, that. No, it wasn't a dream." The grin came to the other's eyes again. "It all happened You should remember this then. I exist only to kill.' And don't say no again. Because I do."

_This is the part of me that!_

_The part that's been saying all those bad things_

"No, _I_ don't!" Vivi disputed. "You maybe, but not me!"

The winged version sighed. "I'm awfully stubborn. You see, I AM you, like I said before."

"No you're not!!" Vivi yelled in frustration. "Y-you're just some thoughts that appeared in my mind, you aren't supposed to be here!!"

"Hmph. What makes you so sure?"

"B-because" he trailed off, not finding an answer within reach.

"Why is this so hard? You want to fulfil your purpose. Don't you?"

"No I don't want to hurt anyone"

"You think that. But you do, it's why you were created."

"I'm not like those others. I don't _have_ to hurt anyone!"

The other mage laughed. "No, I'm afraid you're mistaken. Not only do you have to, as it is instructed, but you _want_ to."

"No!"

"Shut up, you clueless little fool!" the other version snapped. He laughed again. "I'm standing here insulting myself. But sometimes you need to tell yourself when to quit." He moved closer to Vivi, until they were face to face. "Why do you fight it when you know that it's right?"

"It's not right! It's never right to hurt anyone!"

"The world is ruled by the strong over the weak. Do you want to be weak?"

"That's not what matters"

"Whatever. You'll figure it out soon enough, that you really have no choice in the matter I exist to kill; it was why I was created. I have to do as I was instructed."

"Instructed?" Vivi repeated.

"Yes. I have to kill Zidane, and all the others so they do not interfere with the plans."

"W-what?!"

Again the other laughed. "It doesn't matter! Nothing you think does, and it never will."

"What are you saying?! Tell me!"

"I don't need to. I am you, you know for yourself."

"I don't know, because you aren't me. I don't think like that. I don't want to hurt anyone, especially not my friends!"

"Even if you don't, it doesn't matter. You'll stop fighting it someday. And then you'll do what you were meant to." If it was at all possible, the look in the other's eyes seemed to become even more devilish. "Just imagine the look in Zidane's eyes as you burn him alive and-"

"Shut up, just shut up!!!" Vivi screamed. "Stop it! Get out of my mind!!!"

"It's not so simple to remove a part of yourself."

"You're not me! You're not!!!"

The other mage gave him a glare that would have almost chilled him in real life, but in the world of dreams it gave him an overwhelming feeling of dread. "Just be quiet. Continuing to disavow your own existence will only result in your destruction." He said and turned away from him. "I think it's time you faced reality once again."

* * *

The next thing Vivi knew, he found himself lying on a soft surface. He was confused for a moment, remembering having fallen onto the stone streets of Lindblum, and then the dream... Was he still dreaming?

The next thing he did was to attempt to sit up, but he drew in a sharp breath as he felt several aches where he had been struck by debris. His head and wing hurt especially, and he feared the latter was broken. He was definitely no longer dreaming

He hadn't opened his eyes, but he heard voices near him.

"I think it's he coming to. Use another Cure spell." He heard a male voice say. 

"Okay" a softer female voice replied. Seconds later Vivi felt the healing white magic as it treated his injuries further. Much to his relief, even the pain from his wing and head all but faded.

Vivi opened his eyes, again finding himself in the castle's guestroom, only this time he was sure it was real. He saw Zidane and Dagger near the bed he lay on, and Minister Artania with two guards, standing further off.

"What happened?" Vivi asked quietly.

Zidane's face was grim. "You were real lucky. We found you just as those people were about to finish you off. We were almost too late"

"Oh" Vivi sat up in the bed. "Thank you"

"Vivi, are you alright?" Dagger asked. "I mean, really alright?"

"I don't know." he admitted, looking down as he did when troubled. "I'm sorry for trying to do that. I realized it was a mistake, and what you guys said was right, so I used my wings so I wouldn't get hurt."

"You agree this can be undone, then?" Zidane asked.

"Maybe" Vivi considered telling them about his dream, but he wasn't sure how he could explain it. He would prefer to forget it all together, but he knew perfectly well he couldn't. For the time being, though, he would keep it to himself, except for one part he felt it was important to tell them.

"Zidane"

"Yeah?"

"Um I-I think something's making me do these things I'm not sure what, yet, but it still feels like some part of me. But what really worries me is it's saying to kill all of you"

There was a rather awkward silence, which Zidane was the one to end.

"You don't want to thought, right?"

"N-no, of course not!" Vivi stammered. "I mean, **I** don't, but that other part of me L-like I said, I'm worried that I won't be able to fight it"

"We'll need you to a while longer." Dagger said. "Please, Vivi. That way we can get you back to normal."

_She's right I need to just ignore it, or something I'll try not to let it bother me_

_Easier said than done_

Noticing how quiet he'd gotten, Dagger placed one of her hands on his, not sure if he was still nervous about them getting close.

His voice had an obvious quaver to it as he spoke. "I-I don't want to be like this a-anymore I don't want to keep thinking like this"

"That's one of the reasons we're looking for Kuja: to see if this can be undone." Zidane said.

"I know But I-I'm scared I'm gonna try and hurt you again Um D-Dagger?" The girl gave him her attention, and he folded his hands together uneasily. "I have a favor to ask I think it would be safer for all of us since I don't really know what's going on with me, if you could use a Silence spell on me."

"A Silence spell? Why?"

"If I can't use magic, I won't be able to hurt any of you" he said quietly, but he continued before she could protest. "Please... I don't want to hurt you."

"I'll do it" she said. "I'm sorry all of this is happening, Vivi"

"It's not your fault. But I think I'll be okay."

"I understand you're worried Vivi, but do you want to be Silenced for the whole trip?" Zidane asked, raising an eyebrow.

"Um I think I'm okay now, but if I start acting weird again"

"Don't worry, I'll do what you asked." Dagger assured.

"Th-thanks"

* * *

After Zidane got the necessary supplies from the town, they went down to the Base level of the castle. With some help from Cid, they took a trolley to Dragon's Gate and went out onto the Mist covered plains. The Aerbs Mountains were in the distance, as well as the South Gate, which they had traveled through some time before.

_It seems like so long ago So much has happened_

Vivi walked in the lead, Zidane and Dagger close behind. He had insisted they traveled that way, still fretting that he could attack one of them from behind if he lost control again. He wasn't going to take any chances, and thankfully the others understood.

The trio arrived at the tall grasses and soggy ground of the Qu Marsh a short while later. Wooden planks stretched across the water and muddier areas for easier (though not by much) travel through it. From all around them came the sounds of hundreds of insects and frogs that called the place home.

"I wonder where we should start looking?" Zidane mused as they pushed through the tall reeds, finally emerging at a small pond with a bridge over it. There were dozens of large frogs about, as well as another large, familiar figure.

"Quina!" Zidane exclaimed, and the headed over towards the Qu, who had been busily chasing frogs. "You're safe!"

S/he nodded. "Long time no see, Zidane. Much trouble, coming back from Cleyra alone." His/her attention was drawn to the smaller figure behind him. "What?! Aiyaa!! Is Vivi!!!"

"Hi, Quina." Vivi said, waving slightly.

Quina pushed Zidane aside, and Vivi walked over. The gourmand was at a loss for words for a moment.

"Vivi, what happen?? Where you go?? Why you have wings?!?"

"It's a long story" Vivi said. "I'll tell you later if you want."

"Hey Quina" Zidane began, getting his/her attention. "Do you know a way to the Outer Continent? I heard there was an entrance somewhere around here..."

S/he thought for a moment. "Outer Continent... Maybe I find more delicious frogs." S/he nodded. "Sound interesting. I help you, and I eat more frogs. I come with you."

Quina, Zidane and Dagger walked further into the marsh to search for the entrance, but Vivi paused.

_All Quina worries about is food_

He sighed.

_I wish my life were as simple_

He ran to catch up with them, and arrived in time to see Quina run off into some nearby reeds.

"Quina?! Where are you going?!" Zidane shouted.

"I smell! I smell frogs!" s/he shouted back. The three others followed the Qu into the reeds.

"No, we have to look for the entrance to the Outer Continent!" Zidane said angrily. Vivi suppressed a giggle; Quina could be frustrating at times but he found the situation a bit amusing. It was also good to have something to get his mind off the more disagreeable events of the past day.

"I smell frog this way!"

"Hey, Quina! Hold on!" Zidane stopped, and sighed. "Darn it" They followed after him (?) until they came to another clearing, where Quina was trying unsuccessfully to capture frogs.

"They run away again" s/he said sadly.

"Wait a minute, Quina. Check it out." Zidane pointed behind her/him. There was a large, partially collapsed stone structure, with a tunnel leading down. "This entrance... This must be the entrance to the excavation site!"

"First time I see this." Quina remarked. "Zidane, we go inside?"

"Of course we will. It might lead us to the Outer Continent." Zidane said. "Let's go!"

They headed down through a short tunnel, arriving in a long room made of stone. 

"Weird looking place." Zidane commented, surveying the old, ruin-like structures. In particular he noticed the huge steel gate off to one side, and he wondered vaguely what could be behind it.

Vivi went against his own advice, traveling behind the other three. It wasn't that he was upset about anything, quite the opposite. He had noticed that for the time being, the thoughts had receded almost completely. They hardly bothered him at all.

He almost hoped it was a sign that perhaps what had happened was temporary, but experience had shown the mage one shouldn't instill too much hope in something that was more than likely to be untrue.

But he was still in a good mood, and was hoping for it to remain longer, but then everything began to shake. Turning, he saw that the gate had opened. All the others had stopped to look as well.

From behind the opened gate came a huge, purple and black mismatched creature that seemed to be made of weapons. It rolled on spiked wheels, and more spikes protruded from all over its deranged body.

"You have to be kidding!" Zidane exclaimed.

And it was heading with increasing speed towards the four comrades. They didn't need to be told. They _ran_.

Zidane could have easily run far ahead, but his ever-present concern for his friends held him back. Quina, on the other hand, didn't have quite the same set of morals, and somehow the large creature managed to race ahead of him.

They ran across a stone bridge, the creature still in hot pursuit. That's when they saw the gaping hole blocking their path.

"Jump!" Zidane shouted to Quina, who had stopped momentarily. Dagger ran past, managing to leap across the hole. Vivi was next, using his wings for a bit of extra lift to get across. "Come on, Quina!!!" S/he hesitated a split second, and leapt. Amazingly, s/he made it safely to the other side, and continued running. Zidane also got across, leaving the beast to fall to its doom.

Dagger and Vivi ran through a doorway into another room, stopping to catch their breath.

"You okay?" the princess queried.

"Yeah" Vivi gasped. He had been standing in front of the doorway, and saw Quina running towards him. "Look out!" He jumped out of the way as s/he ran in. Zidane came right after, accidentally knocking the Qu over.

"Outta my way!" he snapped.

"Aiya!"

Zidane looked around the new room they had entered, which was just a bare stone room, and wondered where such a monster had come from, when a feminine voice rang out from somewhere.

"Geez that didn't do much good."

"Who's there?"

From another entrance, a dark-skinned, brown-haired girl walked in. She wore tight fitting, colorful attire that greatly accented her already noticeable figure, but perhaps the most eye-catching thing about her was the enormous ax she had strapped to her back. The four comrades all turned their attention to the new arrival.

"I've been looking for you, Princess Garnet." She said, grinning at the other brunette.

"H-have we met?!" Zidane asked, apparently in his mind the ax _not_ being the most eye-catching part of her.

"Quit flirting with her!" Dagger hissed.

"Yes ma'am"

Vivi shook his head.

_How can he still think of girls at a time like this? He's as single-minded as Quina_

"I'm Lani." The woman introduced herself. "I'm under order by the queen to find you, Princess."

Shocked by this statement, Dagger asked, "My mother? What does my mother want with me? I am not returning to Alexandria."

Lani grinned, shaking her head. "I've got bad news for you, Princess. It's not you I'm after."

"What do you mean?"

"The pendant. Does that sound familiar?"

Apparently it did, for Dagger gave a small gasp of surprise, grabbing at the pendant around her neck protectively. 

"Let's have it back. It belongs to Queen Brahne." Lani said, her tone laced with threat. Dagger said nothing, and Lani sighed, taking her silence for misunderstanding. "Listen, carefully, Princess. You escaped unscathed from the monster, but you're not gonna be lucky with me. Hand over the pendant right this minute."

Zidane stepped forward. "Are you the one who set that monster loose?"

"Retrieving the pendant far outweighs the safety of the princess."

"...What do you mean by that?" the teenage boy asked, his eyes narrowed.

"I meant exactly what I said. My orders don't include Princess Garnet's safe return."

Dagger shook her head in disbelief. "What...? My mother would never order that."

Vivi felt a pang of sympathy for the princess. She couldn't understand why her mother was doing such things, why she was being betrayed by the person that she trusted the most. Just as he couldn't figure out why it seemed as if his own mind was betraying him.

"That's enough!" Lani shouted, slamming her axe on the ground. "Give me the pendant! You're trying my patience!"

Zidane didn't seem very worried. "Hmph. What if we refuse?"

The woman almost growled in frustration. "Stubborn fools! Have it your way!" With surprising strength for one her size, she lifted the massive ax and lunged in Dagger's direction, swinging the huge blade. Zidane intercepted her, both his weapons ready, but he was careful to keep his distance. While the ax slowed Lani down slightly, one good hit from the massive weapon could be deadly.

Dagger kept back as Zidane tried fighting off the other woman, his small blades doing little good against the ax. To his surprise, she paused for a moment, only to attack him using a Fira spell. He cried out as the spell hit him, but he was quickly healed with Dagger's white magic.

Quina was staying back, unsure how to help in the situation. Vivi, on the other hand, wanted to help his friends and could, but he needed to get a clear shot at Lani.

He saw his chance as Zidane moved far back from his opponent, and she paused again to cast her own spell. But Vivi cast his own first. He shot a powerful blast of dark energy, a Demi spell, at her, nearly slamming her into the opposite wall. It was enough.

"You're pretty good" she gasped, standing up shakily. "What a drag I'll let you guys go for now!" The defeated woman turned to leave.

_I beat her!_

___I'm going to let her live?_

_?_

_Would it really be such a loss to kill her? After all, she tried to hurt my friends_

_She did but she's leaving now. There's no point in attacking again._

_I want to I have no reason not to_

_Her back is turned, there is no reason to I don't want to._

_Don't I?_

Vivi jerked as he felt someone's hand on his shoulder. It was Zidane, and he looked worried. 

"Are you okay?"

"Huh? Um, yeah. Why?"

"We've been trying to talk to you, but you didn't answer."

"Oh I w-was just thinking But I'm okay now." Vivi said, trying his best to sound somewhat cheerful. "I-is Lani gone?"

"Yeah. I guess you showed her. Thanks for your help, again."

"You're welcome..." He said, adjusting his hat. "She was trying to hurt you guys, after all"

"What you did was perfectly acceptable." Dagger said, smiling. "You don't need to worry."

"Okay." He said after a moment.

_I can fight this_

With his spirits a little higher, he and his friends entered the maze-like Fossil Roo. Thick roots, traveled by the huge, insect-like Gargant, ran across the ceilings of the caves. According to the men they found digging there, though the Gargant was wild they could still ride it by attracting it with Gargant grass and by operating switches that controlled the flow of water onto the root.

It took some time, but they made it out of the caves without any problems. The four of them arrived at the exit of the cave, thankful to see light again.

"This light there's no Mist here." Zidane said. They stepped out onto the Outer Continent.

End part 4.


	5. New World

**Innocence Lost**

**Part 5: New World**

* * *

Vivi was almost disappointed. He could only see a rather bleak, barren wasteland, though there were some mountains and he could discern fields of short grass in the distance. It was interesting that he was in this new, unexplored place, but the scenery wasn't much to look at.

"This it?" Quina said with similar disdain. "There nothing here. Where frogs?"

"No, I think I see something." Zidane pointed to the northwest. "I can't make it out very well Maybe it's a town or something."

"Or big rock" the Qu muttered. "Just as long as they have yummy-yummies."

He sighed. "Yes, I'm sure they'll have yum- er, food. Now let's hurry up and get there before it gets dark."

The walk there was much farther than it had looked. They crossed over the fields of grass, and passed by some small patches of forest. To their west, Vivi saw a much larger forest below a cliff, though all the trees looked to be dead and withered.

The thing Zidane had seen revealed itself to be something of a huge stone block, mounted on enormous tree roots stretching across a canyon.

"We came all this way and there's still no Mist." Zidane said when they arrived finally. "And what a weird-shaped village? What is that thing?"

"Maybe it's a temple of some kind." Dagger suggested.

Quina studied it for a moment. "Is very delicious shape Maybe there fine cuisine inside!" With that, s/he ran across the root towards the entrance.

"Geez all s/he ever thinks about is food." Zidane muttered.

Dagger raised an eyebrow. "Well, all you ever think about is girls" He didn't see, but she followed after Quina.

"Uh, that's right!" Zidane exclaimed. "My mind is filled with thoughts of you!" He turned, expecting to see Dagger, but his eyes only met those of a rather confused black mage.

""

""

Vivi gave him a weird glance, and hurried off into the building.

"Maybe I'm trying too hard" Zidane wondered.

Vivi entered the structure to find himself, Dagger and Quina confronted by three stocky, green-skinned, and generally odd-looking creatures in colorful clothing.

"Rally-ho!" one said.

"Rally-ho!" the other repeated.

The three of them exchanged glances, and Zidane entered behind them.

"What's up with these guys?"

"Rally-ho!" another of them said.

"Wr-wrally-ho?" Dagger attempted to mimic.

"Rhallie-who?" Vivi also gave it a shot, and it seemed good enough for the creatures because they again shouted the words and headed off into the structure. Vivi and Dagger followed.

"Hey, hold up!" Zidane called, but another green-skinned creature blocked his progress.

"Rally-ho!"

"Oh, come on"

"Rally-ho's oor sacred greetin'." He said in a thickly accented voice.

"If ye dinnae say Rally-ho, then ye cannae enter Conde Petie, hametown o' the dwarves!" the other dwarf said.

"Now, wait a minute here"

"Rally-ho!" they both said again.

"" Zidane muttered something, but finally said, though he rolled his eyes, ""

"Rally-ho! Ye can pass!"

* * *

Vivi's spirits had lowered upon discovering the dwarf village. One of the reasons he had agreed to come to the Outer Continent was that he hoped it would be uninhabited, in addition to unexplored. 

_If there was no one here, then there would be no one I could be a threat to_

_But there are What if I lose control again and hurt them?_

_I don't want to, now_

_Odd I wonder why the thoughts haven't been bothering me?_

_Maybe they're gone?_

His train of thought was derailed as a dwarf that was most likely male approached him in the stone hallway. Behind him, a female dwarf approached, and called out to the male one.

"Come hither, ye'!"

"Aaa! I'm sorry-" Vivi began, but the two dwarves continued speaking.

"An' just where do ye' think ye're goin'?" she demanded. "Ye're always loiterin' aroon'!"

The male one scratched his head. "Wheesht! Would ye' stop hecklin' me fer once?"

Seeing that the argument didn't include him, Vivi quickly stepped out of the way. He followed their argument for a moment, but it was difficult to understand due to their odd way of speaking. He did understand when the female one told the other to get to work, and he left, grumbling something unintelligible.

The female dwarf sighed, shaking her head. "Lazy, no-good husband o' mine. Hm?" She finally noticed the black mage standing there. "Mercy me! Are nae ye a wee one An' ah've never seen one of ye' wi' wings before! Runnin' errands here, are ye?"

"Um, pardon me, but" Vivi tried to say, not having an idea what she was talking about.

"Well, give ma regards tae the others!" she said cheerfully, and walked away down the hall, leaving Vivi more confused than he had been before.

_They aren't afraid of me They act like I'm nothing new at all_

_How strange_

Curious, the mage exited the hallway to the outside, making sure to tuck his wings in to fit through the narrow door. He came to a beautiful courtyard of sorts, plants draping the stone walls and the sun shining in through the open top. Bridges crossed an opening in the center, and a colorful, boat-like structure was suspended over it as well. Vivi went to cross the bridge, but then he saw two other dwarves coming from the other side.

"Would ye' look at that?" the first said, nudging the second. "Ah didnae ken they had wings, did ye'?"

"Nay, ah've never seen one wi' wings. Ah think they look nice, though."

"Aye, that they do."

The two dwarves approached Vivi, who wasn't sure what to say. He then spotted Zidane walking over from the opposite side of the bridge.

"'Ow've ye' an' all yer friends been?" the first dwarf asked.

"Is this yer first time here in Conde Petie? Ah've never seen one like ye' before, but ah'd be more n willin' ta show ye' aroon' if ye' likes."

"But likesay, what's a wee lad like ye' doin' here the day?"

Vivi looked at Zidane and shrugged.

"Vivi do you know these people?" he asked.

"No, I've never been here before. How could I?"

"Yeah, I didn't think so" Zidane and Vivi moved out of the way so the dwarves could pass. 

"Zidane, I'm going to go try talking to some other people." Vivi said, and ran off.

_The way they were talking Like they've met me Or something like me?_

Vivi walked into another door, entering the village's shop. There was a counter to one side, merchandise and food piled on and behind it. A girl dwarf stood behind the counter, but it was what the dwarf was speaking to that Vivi noticed.

A black mage.

It looked just like the ones he and the others had fought before, but the fact that it was there, and talking to a dwarf of all things didn't make much sense at first.

_Another black mage??_

"What the-" he began, but then the other mage looked over at Zidane, who had been standing on the other side of the room. The mage's eyes went wide with shock, and in a second it turned, and ran towards the exit.

_Why is he running?_

"W-Wait!" Vivi cried, running after and nearly stumbling in his haste. He chased after, and Zidane followed.

"Vivi, hold on!" Zidane said as they entered another room.

"Come back!" Vivi ran ahead and Dagger walked out from an adjoining hallway. Zidane stopped to speak with her.

"Zidane, what's going on?"

"I have no idea But we've gotta catch up with Vivi!"

They both hurried to the main entrance of the village, where Vivi and Quina were both standing. Vivi looked quite upset, his wings drooping to the ground.

"Vivi, where's the black mage?" Zidane asked.

"He ran away."

_Why did he run?_

_Why is there another black mage here at all?_

_It doesn't make sense_

_Of course, a lot of things haven't lately_

"Huh." The older boy said after a moment. "I wonder where he came from? Has Brahne found us?"

One of the dwarves standing nearby overheard him. "Do ye ken the Pyntie-Hets?"

Vivi looked over at the short figure. "Huh? Did you just say Pointy-Hats?!"

"Nah, ah said Pyntie-Hets!" he corrected. "They often come from the Sootheast Forest tae trade wi' us."

"They? You mean there's lots of them?" Zidane said, voicing his surprise before Vivi could. "And they live near here?"

"Aye! But ye gots tae go all aroon' yon' cliff an' then go east tae find the Sootheast Forest!" he explained, then lowered his voice a bit. "They live sae deep in the forest, even owls dinnae live there!"

Zidane raised an eyebrow. "What's that supposed to mean?"

Vivi was shaken at what he had heard, not surprisingly.

_Other black mages? Like me?_

_NoI doubt they're like me, not like I am now_

_Still I need to find out more about them_

"Zidane, I want to go to the Southeast Forest and find them!" he said adamantly. 

"Yeah, me too."

"I think it's a good idea." Dagger said. "We might find some clues."

"If possible to try new food, anywhere fine." Quina said in his/her typical food-oriented way.

"Alright, let's head for the Southeast Forest!" Zidane said.

* * *

Despite the fact the group was quite tired by then, they began yet another long trek across the barren plains of the Outer Continent.

Vivi barely noticed his fatigue. All he worried about was finding out what was going on

_If there are other mages, maybe they have the same problem I do?_

_Or not_

_I'm not sure_

_Others like me Other black mages who aren't just mindless puppets_

_Puppets All those others I've fought, they were created to kill_

_Like I was._

Vivi nearly stopped walking, but only stumbled once, managing only to continue with great concentration. The thoughts had appeared again with his thoughts of the other black mages, which seemed to be how they always did.

He imagined in his mind, the other him from the dream, laughing

_I can fight it My purpose isn't to kill My purpose is whatever I want it to be_

_That is what I want it to be I want to feel that power again as when I killed the guard The feeling of having a purpose_

_No That's stupid, I have a purpose, and it's not to go around killing people_

_What is my purpose?_

__

_I don't know yet Why would it matter?_

_I know what I desire it to be I cannot deny my reason for existing_

He forced the thoughts into the back of his mind, where surprisingly they seemed content to stay, only occasionally rising back up with their dark intents.

_Am I going crazy?_

The little mage tried to focus on the terrain, but there wasn't much to focus on. They had arrived in the Southeast forest, which was nothing but dead and dying trees. It was a rather depressing place, and did nothing to help Vivi's mood.

"This sign" Zidane noticed a sign tacked to a pole in the ground. "It reads Where owls live'" he read from the sign pointing left. "And Where owls don't live'." Read the sign turning right. "I say we go right."

"That seems too obvious. Maybe we should go left." Dagger suggested.

"I say we see what food there here." Quina added his/her own opinion.

"It's to the right" Vivi said. His friends were taken aback a moment, since he hadn't spoken until that time.

"You sure?"

"Yeah"

With Vivi taking the lead, the four of them headed down the narrow path, only to end up right back at the intersection. Zidane scratched his head in confusion.

"What the heck? Weren't we just?"

"Look at the sign again." Vivi said, pointing. "It says Where owls don't live' pointing left. We go left. We just follow the signs."

_There's something weird about this forest I can't quite figure out what it is_

"If you say so"

They followed his advice, and after a short time they finally arrived in a new area, a long path leading to a stand of yet more dead trees. But they also saw a figure in a pointy hat standing near it. As they watched, the mage waved his hands into the air, and the trees in front of him rippled, like water when one throws in a stone, and then it lifted back, revealing green, perfectly healthy trees behind it.

_It's some kind of illusion_

The mage entered through the opening, and the four others quickly followed, and the illusion closed behind them.

* * *

The village was fairly small, composed of several crude but functional huts, all of which had the same basic round shape, and pointed thatched roofs. Wooden planks made paths around them, and a small stream ran through the village. Of course, the thing that made the village quite unique were the many black mages that walked through it.

Zidane and the others walked into the small clearing at the village's entrance, eliciting shocked stares and gasps from any mages in sight.

"Ahh!"

"H-h-humans!"

"What's wrong?" asked another mage who had been facing away, but when he did see them he reacted in a similar way.

"Humans!! Run!!!"

Within moments they had all fled to other parts of the village, warning any others on their way.

"W-wait" Vivi tried calling, but they were already gone.

_Other black mages Like me?_

_They aren't afraid of me, are they?_

__

He turned to Zidane. "Did you see them?!"

"Y-yeah" he replied, as shaken as Vivi was.

"They were talking There are others like me"

_Or do I have more in common with the ones that don't? The ones that destroyed Burmecia and Lindblum The ones that-_

_No, it's stupid to think like that now! I need to find out what's going on here_

Without saying another word, Vivi hurried off down one of the wooden paths, spotting one of the other mages run over to one standing near a hut.

"The humans are here!" the first said urgently, and they both ran off into the huts.

_I wish at least one of them wouldn't run_

Finally Vivi came to the end of the path, which seemed to be a dead end. There were two black mages standing in front of a low, grass and flower covered hill. There were also several almost scarecrow-like objects stuck in the ground, most with pointed hats or jackets draped over them.

The mage to the left, who looked to be one of the earlier mages made, wearing a much simpler dark purple robe than the second, was the first to see Vivi. He gasped, causing the second mage, who wore much more elaborate clothing and carried a golden colored staff, to also turn.

"Is he the one that came here with that group of humans?" the second mage asked, seeming to study Vivi closely. After a moment, he said, "He's alright. Look into his eyes. He's aware, just like us."

"Th-thanks" Vivi tried to think of what to ask them, but the first mage (who I shall refer to as No. 56, since that's his name) spoke before he could.

"OkayB-but what about"

Vivi followed his gaze and saw he was looking at the wings on his back. He sighed, a bit annoyed with everyone commenting on them. It wasn't as if he needed to be reminded of their presence.

"W-what are those? They look like uh" No. 56 trailed off, trying to remember the word.

"Wings." The second mage, No. 288, finished for him.

"Oh, yeah, wings Are we supposed to have wings?"

"It doesn't matter if he has them, he's one of us."

"Um okay."

_These two they talk so differently. That one mage, he sounds almost like a child But the other acts more like an adult_

_And neither of them acts mean in the slightest_

_They aren't like me_

_? No, they are, they're talking like me_

_But they obviously have forgotten their purpose, haven't they?_

_They just are how I should be Before what happened_

_I am how I should be now Or I will be once I realize how foolish it is to fight it_

_I won't give up_

No. 56 tilted his head in confusion. "A-are you sure he's like us? He hasn't said anything"

Vivi heard, and shook himself out of his preoccupation. "Oh, I'm sorry Um What are you all doing here?" It was the first question that popped into his head.

"We escaped together from Alexandria and the cargo ships." Mr. 288 explained.

"This far?!"

"That's right." The black mage nodded. "We wanted to live in a world where there were no humans. To find that, we had to cross the ocean."

"I see" Vivi said, wondering just how they had made it so far, and made a mental note to ask later. There were many things he wanted to ask, and he wasn't sure what to continue with. He then gestured to the mound behind them. "Um what's this?"

The first mage answered him. "This is a uh what's the word?"

"It's a cemetery." The other supplied.

"Right. A cemetery."

"A cemetery?" Vivi repeated. "So, underneath the ground-"

"Yes," Mr. 288 interrupted. "Our friends are buried here."

_A cemetery? How did? Why?_

"But why?" he asked aloud.

"That's because" he began, but then Mr. 56 began speaking.

"I I came here with Mr. 36. We escaped together. We had so many things to learn. It was really scary, but we helped each other." Then his voice took on a almost sad, but more puzzled tone. "Then one day, Mr. 36 stopped moving. He just stopped Wouldn't move or say anything My friend who knows a lot of things told me this was what death' was, and we had to bury him. Mr. 36 is buried under the ground now, but I don't understand why."

_He doesn't understand death? It would make sense for them not to, though If at one point they were nothing but mindless puppets, then suddenly becoming aware?_

_Was I ever like that? I don't remember very well_

"He's going to come out again one day, right?" Mr. 56 asked with a child-like hopefulness that rather saddened Vivi. "When he does, I'm going to wash him off in the pond."

_Why did his friend die?_

Even though this new question bothered him, he would much rather focus his mind on something other than his own altered thoughts

"Wh-what's he talking about?" Vivi asked Mr. 288, but he didn't respond at first. "Was it a disease, or was he hurt? Tell me! Why?"

Mr. 288 was silent another few seconds, but then said, "That's because they had reached the end of their lives."

"Wh-what do you mean?"

"All things die eventually. It was simply their time" he said, sorrow evident as he spoke.

_They died because they were old?_

_But how long could these mages have been around? Only a year or two at most_

_Black mages have short life spans?_

_ I guess so It would make sense, since_

_They were created as weapons _

_But_

_Like I was._

_I don't care I won't listen to the thoughts They're wrong_

_I'm denying my own thoughts I exist only to kill_

"Are you okay?" No. 56 asked worriedly, noticing the way Vivi had started shaking. He looked over at his friend. "Is he okay?"

"I'm not sure" He shook his head, wondering if perhaps what he had said had so affected the smaller mage. It was a possibility, but he walked over to check on him, and also realized he hadn't asked his name yet. "Are you alright?"

_I won't listen I can fight it_

_I can't fight myself I can't fight what I believe_

_No, I've gone this far, I won't give up now It's not my purpose to hurt anyone I don't care what my purpose is, but I know what I want, and it's not to hurt anyone!_

___Why am I still fighting it? It's futile_

_I exist to kill _

"Is he sick?" Mr. 56 asked.

"I don't know." He replied, which bothered the other mage since he had always assumed his friend knew everything or at least much more than he did.

Mr. 288 then noticed Vivi seemed to be whispering something, barely audible. He put his hand on Vivi's shoulder, which he did respond to, jerking back like he'd been shocked.

"Aaah! I-I Oh no, I I'm sorry, I need to go now" Vivi turned quickly, nearly tripping, and ran from the cemetery, leaving two bewildered mages.

"He was acting funny" Mr. 56 remarked. "Don't you think?"

"Yes but he sounded like he was afraid of something" The second mage tapped his staff on the ground, wondering if he should go speak with the newcomer, but decided against it, knowing he would probably be coming back.

* * *

_I almost lost control again I've been doing fine until now_

_Maybe because of what he said So many things have changed in such a short time..._

_Maybe it's too much to handle at once_

Vivi ran right past Zidane, hardly noticing him, and headed over a bridge across the stream into one of the houses. There was a single mage, standing behind a counter, who jumped a bit as he entered. In the rest of the room were shelves of books, several paintings on the wall, and even a phonograph off to one side. A doorway led to another room.

The mage watched Vivi a bit nervously, and naturally he noticed the dark blue wings on his back. He was about to ask about them when Zidane entered.

"Vivi? What's wrong?"

"Um I-I think I almost lost c-control again I was talking to another black mage, and I don't know what happened, I had thought I would be okay"

Zidane cursed under his breath. He had been extremely grateful his friend had been acting normal for most of the trip, so the news quickly lowered his mood.

"Zidane, I'm confused" Vivi said, looking down at the rug on the floor. "And I don't know how to explain what I'm confused about"

_There are too many things to explain_

_Whatever that was done to me Whatever that's wrong with me_

_Now what I heard about these other mages stopping._

_Maybe I can go talk with that other mage later_

Zidane was thinking of something to say to comfort the mage when a rather angry Quina walked in.

"Grr I hungry! These village people eat terrible food."

Dagger walked in a moment later. "Oh, Vivi, you're back. Where were you? You look very" She paused, looking at Zidane. He walked over to her.

"He said he was feeling weird again." He told her quietly. "I think we all need some rest, him especially."

"Oh Is he okay now?"

"Yeah"

"You're right, we all do need some rest" She raised her voice so Vivi could hear. "We should probably call it a day."

Quina headed for the door. "I go to forest and look for food." S/he declared, and walked out.

"Yeah, we'll call it a day" Zidane agreed, looking over at Vivi. They spoke with the innkeeper, who was more than happy to let them have the only room for the night, saying he didn't get much business.

* * *

It was dark a short while later. There was only a bunk bed in the room, and only room for two people. Vivi had offered to sleep on the floor, but Zidane insisted he had the bed. But he still refused, and left to the other room of the inn.

The little mage walked over to the one standing behind the counter.

"Um, is your room okay?" he asked a bit nervously.

"Yeah, it's fine" Vivi replied.

"Oh, good. Um"

"What?"

"Sorry, but I've never seen another black mage with wings But they look really nice. C-can you fly with them?"

Vivi laughed a bit, though he wasn't sure if he was actually amused or not. "I've never really tried."

"Oh. Well they still look nice."

"Thanks Do you know that one mage who was standing at the, um, cemetery today?"

"You mean Mr. 288? Yes. Why?"

"Oh, I was just wondering Do you think he'd still be there?"

The mage thought for a moment. "Probably. He spends a lot of time there."

Vivi nodded. "Thank you."

_I'll go talk with him Maybe he can help explain some things_

Dagger watched from the top bunk as Vivi exited the inn.

"Zidane" she said worriedly. "Vivi just walked out."

"Maybe he's letting us have a little romantic quiet time."

The girl felt like pelting him with a pillow. "I'm serious!" she snapped.

"I wouldn't worry too much."

"But what if something happens? You know, what if he"

"I know what you mean, but I don't think anything will happen." He said assuredly, and Dagger was a bit baffled why he felt that way.

"Why are you so sure?"

"I noticed how, even when he changed sometimes, he would always try not to hurt us. It's like his devotion to his friends can overcome whatever is affecting him." He shrugged. "That's my little theory, anyway."

"I think it's a good one. So you think he'll feel the same way about these other black mages?"

"Yeah, I mean, this is the first time he's seen black mages like himself. I doubt he'd want to hurt them."

Dagger looked up at the ceiling, crossing her arms across her chest. "I'm so worried about him."

"So am I. But until we find out what happened and how to reverse it, all we can do is stay with him and offer him our support. He's been through a lot, and discovering this place just seems to have complicated it further"

"What do you mean?"

"Well, you remember how he was affected by what happened in Dali? That really confused him. You know how he kept asking if those other mages were like him. Then later on he was taken by Kuja, something happened and then he completely changes, and starts talking about how he _is_ like those others, and all that about existing to kill.' And the way he says it He believes it, but he doesn't. He's scared, because he wants to hurt us I would be, too."

""

* * *

Vivi approached the cemetery, and sure enough Mr. 288 was standing there, alone this time.

"Hello." The bigger mage greeted. "Nice to see you again."

"Um I'm sorry for running off last time"

"It's alright. I was wondering if you were okay."

Vivi walked over, standing next to him in front of the graves. "I don't know"

The response wasn't quite what Mr. 288 had expected. "Why don't you?"

"It's hard to explain C-Can I ask you a question?"

"What is it?"

He fidgeted nervously, clasping his hands together. "Um this is going to sound weird, but do you, or any of the other black mages ever think weird things?"

Mr. 288 gave him a misunderstanding look, so Vivi elaborated. "Um I mean, like bad things"

"Why are you asking something like that?" he said, not sounding angry, but Vivi regretted asking anyway.

"N-no, just forget I asked."

"But I wish to know what you meant. It sounds serious. Is there some sort of problem?" he asked.

"You could say that"

Mr. 288 remembered again that he had failed to ask Vivi's name, and asked then.

"Huh? My name? It's Vivi."

"Vivi You don't go by your number?" he mused thoughtfully.

"I don't think I have a number." Vivi said, shrugging.

_If I was created like all the other black mages How come I don't have a number?_

_That doesn't matter, though_

"What happened earlier Was it what I told you that upset you?"

He shrugged again. "I think it may have had something to do with it. I'm not sure."

"I can understand if it was It sometimes upsets me as well."

"You mean because some of you have stopped moving?"

"Yes. You're kind to use our words, but you are asking if I'm upset about the ones who have died' not stopped'."

"Um How many of you have?"

He continued. "Seven of our friends stopped functioning recently I think our life span is limited I've suspected this ever since the first one of us came to a stop. It varies a little, but most of us stop moving one year after production. I haven't told anyone else about this, because if I did, then they'd feel the same way I do."

"What do you feel?" Vivi asked. He had been bothered by the news of the mages stopping' but not as much as Mr. 288 seemed to be.

"I don't know." He admitted. "Fear? I don't want to stop. And maybe I want to run away from it all But living in this village with everyone fills me with joy. The joy of living with them far outweighs the fear of death."

_I can understand what he means_

_Am I afraid of dying, too?_

_If I'm like them, then I have a short life span, too_

_No. I don't think I'm afraid of dying. Maybe I would have been at some point_

_I'm more afraid of what I'm capable of doing while still alive_

_Huh maybe death would be preferable to this_

_No, I can't start thinking like that There's still hope, isn't there?_

"Isn't it the same for you?" he asked Vivi. "Traveling with your friends gives your life meaning."

"I I guess so. But"

_Not when I want to kill them_

Vivi watched as one of the owls native to the forest flew overhead to perch on one of the grave markers. It looked at them uninterestedly with its large eyes before turning its head to preen its outstretched wing. Vivi looked over at his own to see that the feathers were also in need of some sort of grooming, bits of leaves and other things stuck among the quills. He started pulling them out and straightening the feathers, if only because he needed something to do.

Mr. 288 watched him a moment before speaking again. "It seems as if something else is bothering you. I could see in your eyes you were aware, but I saw something else It looked like you were already afraid of something."

He paused in what he was doing to answer. " You could say that."

"What? If you don't mind saying." He was concerned for this small mage, but also a bit curious.

"No, I don't mind You told me what you were upset about" Vivi thought carefully on how to explain it. It was no easy task; he not only was still in the dark about most of it, but even talking about it bothered him. But he managed to in hope that this other mage could help him.

"What I asked earlier, about having weird thoughts Um you see" He frowned, or at least the look in his glowing eyes was as close as he could get to the expression. "Um, you know the wings I have?" He raised the two extra limbs up a little with the question.

"Yes, a lot of the others have been wondering about them. None of us knew that some black mages had wings."

"So I heard Well, I didn't always have them. Something I don't know what, was done to me, and the wings were part of it But it they weren't the only things that resulted from it Whatever was done was something really bad because ever since then all these terrible things have been happening..."

Mr. 288's concerned deepened. "Was it something humans did?"

"I think"

He nodded knowingly. "Though I know not all of them are bad, some of them would want to force us to fight again. That was one of the reasons we fled here, to avoid having to fight again."

"Oh" Vivi said, the words seeming to upset him greater, which Mr. 288 noticed. "Well I guess I know the answer now I asked if you guys were thinking those bad things, but if you don't want to fight, then you must not."

"I'm sorry, but, I don't really understand what you're trying to say"

Vivi didn't say anything at first, but then he turned to face the other mage. "Please don't think I'm rude for asking, but did you ever kill anyone? Before you became aware?"

He was still quite taken aback by the question, but answered anyway. "No doubt I did But it wasn't something I did consciously."

"That's what I thought S-so, you've never even thought about trying to hurt anyone?"

He shook his head. "No, of course not. Why are you?"

Vivi turned away again, focusing his attention on cleaning the other wing. He still spoke as he did so, his tone melancholy. "Because ever since what was done to me, that's what I've been thinking about" 

Mr. 288 wasn't sure what to say to him. Had this small mage just said he wanted to hurt people? As far as he knew, few of the mages even understood the concept of violence

"It's hard to explain." Vivi continued. "Because I don't want to hurt anyone Yet this part of me keeps saying that I was created to kill, and it's why I exist. It was why all of the black mages were created, but for some reason part of me _wants_ to do it"

_It's easier to talk about But what if he doesn't understand?_

_Or what if he becomes afraid of me?_

Looking over at the other mage, Vivi saw that he didn't look confused, in fact he was listening intently, so he went on. "I'm not sure if this other part is really part of me or not. I don't want it to be, but maybe it's that same part that wants it to be. Sometimes I end up listening to that part, and it gains control." He lowered his voice to almost a whisper. "I've already killed someone I can't always fight it. Sometimes it takes over. That was what happened earlier. I was starting to listen to that other side, and agreeing with it I was afraid I would attack you"

Mr. 288 found the plight of the smaller mage was familiar in some ways. It had been a topic of discussion for a while in the village. A few of the black mages had brought up the fact they had killed people, and many of them were quite bothered by it. But he had calmed most of their fears by explaining that it wasn't anything they did intentionally, or wanted to do. Vivi, on the other hand, could not be helped with those same words, since according to what he had told him, he had done such things of his own will.

"We were created for that purpose" Mr. 288 said. "But I don't think any of us have ever wanted to do those things. I can't understand why anyone would want to"

"Neither can I. That's what scares me about it. I never used to think this way I don't want to be like this anymore But that's one of the reasons why me and my friends came to the Outer Continent to find Kuja, and see if this can be reversed"

"Kuja?"

"Y-you know about him?"

He nodded. "He was the one who did this to you?"

"Yeah. That's what we think, anyway. He's done a lot of bad things So we're hoping if we find him, I can be normal again." Vivi looked downwards, clasping his hands together. "It's terrible You can't imagine what it's like to want to hurt people you care about"

"That statement alone tells me that this isn't something normal." The other mage told him resolutely. "You aren't supposed to ever want to do something like that. And since you said you didn't want to hurt them then I don't see why you're worried that that these bad thoughts are your own. You said someone was done to you probably it was because of that. If they aren't your thoughts, you shouldn't have to listen to them"

Even though what he had said was almost exactly what Vivi had been telling himself the entire time, hearing it from someone else, and someone who sounded sure, more or less, did help him somewhat.

"Maybe you're right"

"It's getting late." The taller mage commented a few minutes later. "Both of us should go get some sleep."

"Yeah" Vivi turned to leave.

"I hope everything turns out okay for you." Mr. 288 said.

"You too Um Thank you for listening."

He nodded. "Was I able to help at all...?"

"Yes, you did Thank you." Vivi said, and headed for the inn.

End part 5.

Note: Egads, was that last scene hard to write! _ Heck, this entire chapter was Changing stuff is hard! -_- I rewrote parts of it, so I kind of like how it turned out Hmm Well, the next part is fun. =)

Okay, SHAMELESS PLUG time! ^_^;;; See, I got a site I gots lots of fics, but very few FF fics now, I've emailed some authors, but there are so many I like, it's hard to email em all So if some of you would simply give me permission to use your fics, that'd just make my day. ^_^;;; Hehe You'll get full credit and all that ::goes off and hides in a corner::


	6. Revelations

Innocence Lost

_Note: Er, sorry for the delay, but a lot of stuff came up... For example, I've been moving my website! See, now it's at _[_www.ivynajspyder.com_][1]_ ! I so happy! ^_^ Okay, anyways..._

_Hehe, hopefully the beginning of this one'll make up for the general suckiness of those last two I actually like the beginning of this one. Mwahaha Of course, it goes back to being sucky again, but ::sigh:: I'm still contradicting myself. =P_

_Warning: I was feeling oddly silly while writing this chapter. =) My silliness shows itself differently than most people's would, however_

**Innocence Lost**

**Part 6: Revelations**

After his conversation with Mr. 288, Vivi returned to the inn.

_I guess I feel a little better_

_He was right about all that stuff It helps_

_Of course it doesn't do anything to stop this I didn't expect that, though_

Dagger and Zidane had been waiting for him. Of course, he again insisted Vivi take the bottom bunk, saying he'd be perfectly fine with a blanket on the floor. Vivi gave in, secretly grateful to have the soft bed to sleep in.

Before he went to sleep, he made sure to have Dagger cast a Silence spell on him, to give him at least some piece of mind. Even though some of his fears were lessened, he still realized that the other side of him was still there, and still a possible threat.

_It doesn't matter what I think. I have no choice_

_No, I can fight it. I won't listen, I won't let it control me_

A few hours passed, and Vivi found he couldn't sleep. He was exhausted, both physically and mentally, yet he still was unable to find rest. Nothing he tried helped either, even when he resorted to counting chocobos.

_Maybe I'll go take another walk It's awfully late, though_

Shakily, he stepped from the bed, heading for the other room of the inn. The mage there was gone, and Vivi assumed he had gone home for the night. Looking outside, he saw all the lights in the village were out. He wondered if he was the only one still awake.

_Maybe I still have too much on my mind to sleep?_

_Or maybe I'm afraid to fall asleep_

The mage thought back to the dream he had in Lindblum, and the dark side of himself he had faced. Would he see it again if he fell asleep?

_It wouldn't matter, it's just a dream, and they can't hurt you_

_Not physically, anyway_

It may have just been the fatigue, but he found himself worrying that if he **did** fall asleep, that other side of him would take over him completely, and then proceed to kill everyone in the village

Realizing how rather farfetched it seemed, he forced a nervous laugh.

_Oh boy, I really, _really_ need some sleep_

_Besides if I did have another weird dream, maybe I could tell that other me what I've realized, and maybe he'll leave me alone_

He wasn't sure how to think of the other him'. He refused to see it as a part of himself, and more than ever he saw the thoughts as nothing more than unwanted invaders. Could it be argued with, maybe even convinced to think otherwise?

Vivi heard a soft sigh above him, and looked to see Dagger roll in her sleep onto her back. 

_I wonder if they'd be sleeping so easily if I could still use magic?_

_I don't want to hurt them, now I can't_

_Maybe if I can't, I won't want to anymore?_

_But if I start thinking strangely again I can fight it Can't I?_

_Yeah. In fact, I don't feel strange at all. I'm just tired_

_Still How can she sleep like that knowing I'm here?_

_Knowing what I could do?_

He pondered about that thought for a moment. It didn't make much sense to him.

_I exist to kill_

_They're ignoring that fact._

_I deny it but_

_My purpose is to kill them As I was instructed_

_Why? Why do they still trust me?_

_Because they believe I'm still a good person?_

He narrowed his eyes, not in anger, but rather out of annoyance.

_How can they be so so stupid?_

_I don't want their pity_

_I don't want them to keep acting like nothing ever happened!_

_They don't understand I exist to kill_

_What if I decided I wanted to listen to the thoughts?_

_Why would I do that, though?_

_If it is truly what I desire_

_Is it?_

_That other side isn't me But what if I started listening to it anyway? What if I suddenly wanted to? What if I started to do what it said?_

_Why would I?_

_Why _wouldn't_ I? _

_If I don't have a choice_

The mage looked up at the bed, studying the sleeping figure. The girl slept peacefully, her arms folded across her stomach. The blanket had been thrown off, the night being too warm for it.

_She's so vulnerable_

_It would be so easy_

The yellow eyes that watched the girl had abruptly altered to a glowing red.

_I exist only to kill._

_You don't always need magic to kill_

He turned smoothly, purposefully, and walked to where another figure slept on the floor. Zidane slept atop a thick blanket, snoring loudly.

Vivi saw what he needed on the floor next to him. A simple leather sheath, or more accurately, what it contained.

He silently pulled out the dagger, holding it up to the moonlight streaming in from a window. While he wasn't used to handling such a weapon, it would do just fine for his intentions.

Suppressing the urge to laugh at their trusting of him, he walked back over to the bunk beds, climbing up quietly to the sleeping princess. He reached out, touching her dark hair lightly. She fidgeted, but that was all.

_Only to kill_

Then he grabbed a fistful of her hair, yanking savagely. The sudden pain caused her to wake up, her hands automatically reaching up to remove the cause of her distress.

But she froze when her eyes caught sight of Vivi. Her brow furrowed in confusion, her mind still not fully aware. But she soon woke up fully as she saw the fiery glow of his eyes and the glint of light off the blade in his hand.

She opened her mouth to speak, to cry out, but was unable. She could only gape silently, wondering in the back of her mind if it was some bad dream.

The second flare of pain from her scalp as he pulled her head back convinced her otherwise. The girl tried to pull away.

Her attempt was in vain, and too late as Vivi quickly sliced the blade along her unprotected neck. The dagger was sharp and the one slash was all it took, for suddenly the front of her blouse, as well as Vivi's arm, were suddenly covered in the dark blood that spurted from a severed artery.

The mage quickly dropped the knife onto the bed, instead grabbing a nearby pillow to cover her face and prevent any cries from escaping her lips. She struggled wildly at first and the mage was barely able to hold her, but she quickly weakened as her blood drained from her and onto the surrounding blankets. Vivi held onto her for several more seconds until she finally ceased moving, and waited a moment more for the rise and fall of her chest to come to a stop.

He removed the pillow, to see as she stared unblinking at the room's ceiling, the last specks of life fading from her eyes.

Vivi turned to climb down, pausing to pick up the dropped knife.

He unexpectedly felt something grab his arm. Turning his head slowly, he beheld a gruesome sight. Dagger, though he was sure she had been dead, had somehow revived, and it was her pale hand that clawed at his arm. He tried getting away, but her grip was strong.

To his horror, the girl seemed to be decomposing before his eyes. Her once beautiful eyes were gone, replaced by haunting black sockets. Her skin seemed to melt away, revealing the tissue and bone beneath. Her partially skeletal jaw worked slowly, as if trying to form words

Vivi screamed

And he woke up, jolting upright in the bed, gasping. He knew that he probably would have screamed if his voice hadn't been muted by the spell.

He remembered the dream, no, nightmare, vividly. So much so, in fact, he briefly wondered if it had really happened. He feared getting up to look at Dagger's bed, expecting a hideous corpse to meet his gaze

But he faced the fear, looking over the top edge of the bunk. Dagger was there, alive, and sleeping soundly.

He felt relieved, but he couldn't erase the image of her corpse from his mind. He could clearly picture her, her throat slashed and a huge amount of blood staining the area around her

Vivi felt ill suddenly, but the nausea quickly abated leaving him to his thoughts.

_I thought I had gotten past this What if it's just getting worse?_

_At least it was only a dream_

He shuddered, remembering how in the dream he almost reveled in what he had done, as he had in real life.

_Why is this happening to me?_

_I'm scared_

_What if I still can't control it?_

_I know it can't be a part of me but it's still there!_

_I don't want to be like this anymore I don't want to keep thinking these things_

_What if I really don't have a choice?_

_What if I really do kill my friends?_

The little mage had fought the tears before, but by that time he could no longer hold them back. He cried in silence, rivulets of tears running down his dark face.

"Why are you crying?"

Vivi jerked back from a voice that sounded close to his head. It sounded familiar, but it wasn't one of his friends. In fact, it sounded much like his own

Looking next to him, he found he was no longer alone in the bed. Sitting there, lounging against the wall, was the being he recognized as the other him' from his dream.

He cried out in surprise, nearly falling off the edge of the bed, but caught himself before he did.

"It wouldn't matter if you fell. This is all in your mind, anyway." The other him said, his ruby eyes oddly bright in the dark room.

Vivi pulled himself onto the bed. "Wait if this is a dream, then did I?"

_Oh no I couldn't have killed Dagger Oh please no_

The other him shook his head. "No, that was a dream as well. It was a nice one though, wasn't it?"

"Wh-what?! No! It was terrible If you're me, you wouldn't want to kill your friends."

"Maybe I'm not you."

"Y-you said-"

"I know what I said. But it doesn't matter."

"You say that a lot."

"Because not many things you think do! So what if I'm not a part of you? How long can you continue to fight the truth? You can't always. One of these days, your guard will slip."

"I'll always fight it I know it can be undone. I won't be like this forever"

_Won't I?_

"Heh, always so hopeful. You know perfectly well you can't fight it forever." The winged mage seemed to grin. "Your own doubts make you a danger to those around you" he said cryptically.

"What do you mean by that?"

He didn't answer, actually he couldn't, for at that moment

Vivi woke up, again. This time the room was bright from the sun streaming in through a window, and Zidane was already awake, stretching.

"Morning. Sleep well?" he asked. Vivi nodded slightly, even though he hadn't. "Good. Oh, here you go." He tossed an Echo Screen over. "In case you feel like talking."

He thanked the other boy after taking the remedy.

"W-where's Dagger?" he asked upon seeing the top bed empty.

"Oh, she went to go see if anyone can help us find what we're looking for." Zidane replied. "Hey, sorry for asking so much, but everything's still okay with you, right?"

Vivi tried a rather morbid joke. "Well I haven't killed anyone else yet, have I?" Zidane gave him a rather odd look, not quite sure if he was being serious. But then Vivi laughed, and so did he, albeit rather forcedly.

"Er, I guess you must be feeling better."

"Yeah I spoke with one of the other black mages, and it helped out a lot. I'm still worried about some things But I think I can handle it better."

_Or I hope I can_

_No matter what that other says_

_But what did he mean by my own doubts?_

_Doubts about what?_

While one would expect the strange dream to bother him more, it instead had only increased his will to fight the other him'. He wasn't sure why he felt that way either, but it certainly wasn't a bad thing.

"I'm gonna go look around." Vivi declared. "I'll see you later."

"See ya." Zidane called as Vivi left. He smiled, glad to see his friend acting so much more cheerful. Maybe everything would be okay.

That still didn't mean he wasn't going to pound Kuja's face in when they found him.

Vivi headed for the cemetery to see if Mr. 288 was there, but he didn't get far from the inn before he was stopped by four other black mages. He recognized one as being No. 56 from the cemetery.

"Y-you're Vivi, right?" one of them asked nervously. Vivi nodded. "Oh, um"

"Can we talk to you?" another one of them asked.

"Of course."

"Great! Uh S-so, you came from the Mist Continent, too?"

"Yep. My friends and I traveled here together."

"Do you travel a lot?" another mage asked.

Vivi thought a moment. "Yeah, I've been to a bunch of places."

"Really?" Mr. 56 said. "Um are you going to be leaving the village?"

"Um Probably. Unless you-"

The fourth mage interrupted him. "Because we wanted to ask a favor" Vivi looked over at him and he continued. "All us were talking about asking you earlier, so, um I guess I will then."

"Okay. What is it?"

"W-We don't leave the village much. It can be dangerous out there, and there are still the bad humans who would m-make us fight again" He explained. "Since you've already been traveling and all, um we were wondering if you could go see the outside world for us, and m-maybe tell us about it?"

"It would be really nice if you would." Another one of them said hopefully.

_Why not?_

"Sure. I'd be glad to." He replied. The other black mages thanked him, and the little mage headed for the village's entrance to find Zidane and Dagger waiting. He told them of what the other mages had asked, and they told him about how they had learned of a silver dragon being spotted near the Sanctuary' beyond Conde Petie. After Quina arrived, the four of them returned to the dwarf village.

After doing a bit of investigating, they found that only those who had undergone the Ceremony' could pass through to the Sanctuary. Zidane spoke with Father David, the dwarf priest, to find that the Ceremony was similar to a wedding. He suggested to Dagger that they do it to get through, and much to his surprise she agreed! Afterwards, when he tried to think of a way to get Vivi and Quina through, there was a sudden commotion as two thieves, a small girl and a moogle, were chased from the village, during which time Vivi and Quina sneaked past the occupied guards.

The four of them walked onto the mountain path to find one of the thieves stuck on a branch. She was a young girl with short purple hair, wearing a strange pink and yellow outfit. The most unique feature was the small horn that protruded from her forehead. Hovering in front of her was a small moogle.

"Hey" Zidane said as they walked over.

The girl flailed harder, trying in vain to get unstuck. "Hurry Mog, before we get caught!"

"Kupo!" the little creature cried, unable to help the girl.

"What's wrong, Mog?"

Mog saw the group approaching. "K-Kupo!" it said fearfully, and flew off, leaving a very angry girl.

"W-wait! Don't leave me!" she shouted, then sighed. "Stuck on a branch Betrayed by my own trusted moogle! Is this how I meet my end?" she said rather melodramatically. "Mog I'm gonna haunt you if I die here!" The girl then caught sight of the four figures who had been watching her, not quite sure what to make of her. "Oh, am I hallucinating? That person has no horn He has a tail, though."

As she spoke, Quina walked up to the small cliff that the branch protruded from, and went directly to where the girl hung.

"Huh?!" she exclaimed upon seeing the bizarre creature. "AHHH! Help!!! Don't eat me, I won't taste good! It's true!!! I taste awful!"

Zidane smirked. "You heard her, Quina."

"I see. Too bad." The Qu shrugged. "But moogle that ran away very strange color. I go find and eat it."

"No, don't!" the girl cried. Above her, Quina leapt to another part of the path, causing the girl to fall from the branch, directly into Zidane's arms.

"Gotcha!"

"Th-thanks." The girl said, a bit dazed. Dagger walked over to them.

"Are you okay?" she asked.

"Yeah"

"You're not hurt?"

"I told you I'm okay!" the girl snapped, jumping down from Zidane's arms. "I'm not a child, like that kid with the wings!"

Vivi sighed.

_The wings again _

_Huh I wouldn't have expected to see a little girl Are there humans here too?_

_No, humans don't have horns I wonder why she's here, though?_

"Wait, you don't look any older than me." Vivi pointed out.

"Are you kidding?! And I do have a name, you know." She said, her hands on her hips. "The name's Eiko! Shouldn't you introduce yourself before addressing a lady?"

"But you introduced yourself first"

"You got a problem?!" she growled.

_Wow, she's kind of mean_

After introductions and a brief discussion, they decided to head for Eiko's home, which she said was nearby. They headed along the path through the mountain, which was crisscrossed by huge tree roots. As they walked, Eiko backed up until she was alongside Vivi. He watched her, wondering if she was going to say something, when she abruptly reached out, pulling a feather from his wing!

"Ouch!" he cried, jumping back. "W-why did you do that??"

She got am embarrassed look. "Sorry, I didn't think they were real See, I have wings too, but they're just for looks." Eiko turned slightly, showing him the two tiny white wings pinned on her back.

He muttered something unintelligible.

"Well geez, I said I was sorry!" she said angrily. "Hey, I just realized! You look just like one of those funny looking guys I see at Conde Petie sometimes! Are you?"

"Maybe." He replied.

_Didn't anyone ever teach her to be polite to people she just met? She's awfully nosey_

_She didn't have to pull that feather off, she could have just asked_

_I'm still exhausted_

_My head hurts_

_I'm still confused about all the stuff that's been going on_

_I really don't feel like talking_

"Come on, answer me!" Eiko insisted.

"Leave me alone" Vivi said moodily, moving his wing so it was between them.

"Hey!" she cried, jumping to see over it. "I was just trying to talk to you!"

_If she keeps this up, I don't know what I'm going to do_

He narrowed his eyes, glaring in her direction, though she couldn't see the gesture.

_No, this isn't like me to get mad at someone, even if they are annoying_

_She is pretty darn annoying, though_

"Vivi, why aren't you listening? Stop ignoring me! I hate it when people do that." She pouted.

_I exist_

_No Not again I said I wasn't going to listen!_

___I exist only_

_I need to calm down Maybe it's because I'm getting angry._

Vivi took a deep breath, trying to block out Eiko's persistent chatter as well as the thoughts his irritation with her was starting to bring out. Combined with the fact he hadn't gotten a very good night's sleep and wasn't in the best of moods to begin with, he found himself thinking how nice it would be to just fry her little body to a crisp

__

_No, I can't I won't!_

_I exist only to_

"Well if you don't want to talk, I'll just go talk with someone else! Hmph!" She turned her nose up haughtily and walked quickly up to Zidane.

Vivi breathed a sigh of relief. But the thoughts didn't recede with her leaving.

_I exist only to kill_

_I want to_

__

_No, I don't No, I mean I do No_

He shook his head in confusion.

_I exist to kill?_

_No_

_I exist only to kill._

_I don't want to listen to it! Why can't I make it stop??!!_

_I exist only to kill._

_I want to. I need to do what I was instructed I've waited too long_

Vivi looked to see that all of the others were ahead of him. Zidane seemed to be trying to edge away from Eiko, and Dagger was just walking along, humming a tune to herself.

_They aren't paying attention._

_It would be too easy_

_Why am I complaining?_

Vivi adjusted his hat, his eyes changing color yet again as he did. He thought for a moment which spell would be most effective against the group, and came up with an appropriate one.

_They won't know what hit them_

_ I'm trying to hurt them I need to stop_

He chuckled quietly, and began charging up for the powerful spell.Vivi noted that the group had come to a split in the path. One led to a huge tree in the distance, surrounded by what looked to be Mist. 

The mage's concentration was suddenly broken as the ground beneath him trembled. The entire group halted, trying to figure out what had happened when the ground shook a second time. When it did a third, the cause was revealed: a huge, green giant that jumped down from another part of the path, directly in front of them all. It roared a threat, and everyone readied for a battle.

_Maybe I should just let it finish the job for me_

_No, it's probably too weak for that_

_But maybe I can help it_

Zidane attacked the giant with his own weapons several times, Dagger helping with her white magic, before he noticed Vivi had yet to cast a spell of his own. He jumped back from the monster, turning in Vivi's direction to see if something was wrong.

"Vivi, what are you waiting for?!" he shouted. "I could use some help!"

The mage looked over at him, and Zidane could see the two red eyes beneath his hat. His own eyes widened, but before he could say anything Vivi launched a small fireball at him, which he narrowly avoided.

"Vivi, snap out of it!" he shouted as a larger blast of flames came much closer to singeing him. It was followed in an instant by an even larger one, this one hitting with enough force to sending him tumbling backwards, unknowingly into the path of the giant.

"Zidane!" Dagger cried.

"What the heck?!" Eiko exclaimed. "Why is Vivi attacking him?!"

There was no time to explain, as the giant took the chance to lunge for Zidane who was weakly trying to stand again. But the beast's move was stopped as a bright flash emanated from the purple-haired girl. From behind her, a huge stone pillar rose from the ground and standing atop it was a huge, blue and white wolf-like creature. It howled, and from beneath the giant a fist formed from the very earth, sending it flying into the distance. Several seconds later a dull thud was heard as the giant landed.

Even Vivi was rather shocked by the display.

"Well, now that the monster is gone" Eiko began. "Would someone please tell me why the guy in the pointy hat just attacked Zidane?!"

Dagger had finished curing Zidane's injuries, and they both faced the mage. Though they were curious about the girl who had shown she could summon Eidolons, the fact that their friend was trying to kill them was the priority at the moment.

"Dammit, I thought he wasn't going to do this anymore!" Zidane said as he stood. "Dagger, you have to cast Silence on him!"

Dagger chanted the words to the spell quickly, but not before Vivi was able to use a weak Fire spell on Eiko. The small girl screamed, even though the spell wasn't powerful enough to do any serious damage.

Vivi had to stop his attack as Dagger's spell came into affect, muting his voice and preventing him from chanting the words necessary to use his black magic. He settled for merely glaring at the three.

_Fools_

_Why can't I gain control again?! Oh no I can't stay like this I can't hurt them anymore_

_I should have just fallen back in Lindbulm I don't want to be like this!!!_

Eiko, overcoming her wounds quickly, jumped up, livid with anger. "That little freak just attacked Zidane AND me!!! What the heck is wrong with him?! Will someone please just tell me what's going on?!"

"As soon as we find that out, we'll tell you." Zidane replied, frowning. He and Dagger both walked over to Vivi, who was still glaring at them acidly.

"Vivi, you need to stop this." Zidane said. "I know you're still in there."

"He's never stayed like this for so long." Dagger whispered.

"So I noticed" he said back. "Vivi, I know you can still fight this. Come on Vivi, listen to me."

___I'm trying_

_I don't even know what to do_

_Why does this fool even bother? Idiot He still has hope for a friend who wants to kill him_

Since Vivi couldn't speak to voice his opinion, he made it perfectly clear by making a gesture with his right hand that the two watching didn't even know Vivi knew about. Needless to say, the two others were a bit stunned.

"Zidane, you don't think he's" Dagger began.

"Like this forever?" he finished.

_No! No I can't be! I'm still here, but_

_I don't understand Am I being blocked? By what?_

Eiko stood nearby, tapping her foot impatiently. "So is he some sort of psycho or what? Because if he is, I'm not taking him home!"

Dagger walked over to explain the best she could what was happening, leaving Zidane with Vivi. Vivi had his hands at his sides, clutching his staff in one, and continued his glaring at the boy.

"I wish I knew how to help you, Vivi." Zidane said. "But we still don't even know what's wrong."

_Nothing's wrong_

_Yes there is! I'm not supposed to want to hurt him!_

_That doesn't matter I was instructed to._

_I still don't understand Instructed? By Kuja? But how?_

_It's not for me to question._

"Like I said to Dagger, all we can do for now is stick with you. Even if you do try to kill us." He managed a half grin.

Eiko's voice suddenly raised loud enough to hear. "WHAT?! Why didn't you warn me he was psycho?! You could of at least said something like Oh, and he might try to kill you for no apparent reason!' I mean, jeez!"

Zidane sighed.

_He always has to be so optimistic. Even though there's nothing he can do_

_I know he can't help I need to fight this myself_

_Even if I can't do anything either._

_Zidane Why are you still being so nice to me?_

_I was instructed to kill you_

_No I can't I don't care if I was!!!_

_I won'tI can't_

_I won't hurt them!!_

As Zidane watched, Vivi's eyes slowly lightened back to yellow as he regained control.

_This can be undone I won't stay like this forever_

_My own doubts When I get upset, that's when it happens_

"Are you, um, normal again?"

Vivi nodded slightly.

_As much as I can be, anyway_

"You want an Echo Screen?"

Vivi shook his head.

Eiko's voice rang out again, and Vivi found it still grated on his nerves. "Is he gonna go psycho again?"

"Eiko! I though I explained what was wrong!" Dagger scolded.

"I know, but I don't want him to destroy my home or kill me or something"

"He won't."

"And he can't." Zidane added. "He can't use magic, remember?"

Eiko just frowned, watching Vivi warily. She didn't know him like the two others, so she was much more untrusting of the young mage. All she knew was he was what one would call emotionally unstable'.

_I can't use magic_

_But you don't need magic to kill someone_

He remembered the dream he had in the black mage village. Vivi was walking next to Zidane, and noticed the hilt of the dagger sticking out from the sheath at his side. In his mind, he imagined himself snatching it, and before anyone could stop him, he could turn around, grab that brat of a girl by those little wings on her back, and-

Vivi quickly halted that particular theme of thoughts.

_I start thinking like that, and it gets worse It's like I start it, I start thinking about something that bothers me, then those other thoughts come_

_It's like I go downhill after that._

_Whenever I get upset, or confused_

_I think that's when it happens_

_Why only then? It doesn't make sense..._

_If Kuja was the one who... no, he was the one who did this, I can't kid myself..._

_Then why make it so it only happens then?_

_Why not just make me some mindless puppet and be done with it?_

_Sometimes I feel like that'd be better..._

Vivi felt his hands trembling. He tried to force them to be still, but then his entire body was.

_But..._

_If that is when it happens How can I stop it then?_

_Sometimes it happens without me realizing it_

He would have dwelled on it further, but the group had finally arrived in Eiko's home, Madain Sari. What was left of it, anyways. He could tell it had once been a fine city, but it's stone buildings were crumbled and looked to have been that way for a long time.

The group talked for a while, Eiko being the chattiest, and then they dispersed among the ruined city. Vivi decided he needed to be alone, so he headed up to a stone balcony of sorts, and leaned against a rope railing overlooking the ocean. It was rather peaceful, with the sound of the ocean crashing upon the weathered rocks below. A single moogle flew overhead before landing behind one of the few houses not in pieces.

Vivi sighed, and returned to his thoughts now that it was quiet enough to concentrate.

_I haven't been making any progress against this, have I?_

_I know it's not supposed to be this way I've been fighting it Haven't I been doing okay so far?_

_I can fight off whatever this is That's what I've been doing._

_But I've seen I can't always fight it_

_Sometimes I'll change, and I'll hurt someone_

_I can't always stop it_

_I don't want to keep thinking like this_

Vivi frowned. (You know what I mean, anyway.) He was shaking again, but this time he found it wasn't because he was afraid or sad. Rather, he was angry, more so than he remembered ever having been.

The cause of it was what Vivi felt he should have been blaming the entire time.

_Kuja_

_It's because of him I'm like this_

_I've been thinking there was something wrong with me this entire time, but for some reason I keep forgetting the fact I wasn't like this until he did something to me_

_I didn't do anything to deserve this I've just been thrown into some situation I can't control_

Vivi remembered something Freya had said to him, sometime before or when they had been in Burmecia.

_"Vivi do you really know what you're doing? The answer you seek may forever change you for the worse." The dragon knight had said._

_Vivi had thought about what she said, but he had his mind made up. "Um y-yeah. But I have to find out who I am. I'm scared what if I'm not even human?"_

Freya's words echoed ironically now, for in searching for answers he had indeed changed for the worse.

_I was trying to find out who I was before I wanted to know about my past_

_I know now. I was created, like the other black mages. That other side was right about one thing You can't deny your own existence. I won't, either. I can accept it._

_Do I really understand all that, though? Where I come from?_

_Maybe_

_But now I need to find out why I've been thinking those bad things. And I need to find out how to undo what was done so I'll stop._

_What if it can't be?_

_Death would be better than living like this. But that would be my last resort I'm not close to that, yet_

The mage looked up as he heard footsteps behind him. It was Zidane. "What's up? Something wrong? Er, I know I ask that a lot, but"

Vivi adjusted his hat, and shrugged. "Not really, I'm just thinking." He had apparently taken another Echo Screen at some point.

"Well, try not to think too much." Zidane said a bit awkwardly. "Get some rest."

Vivi nodded again. "Okay. Thanks Zidane."

_I wonder what I'll do when I finally see Kuja_

_And I wonder what Kuja will think when he sees me again? _

Note: Did I trick anyone with that first part?! Did I?! ^_^;; I reeeaally wanted to kill Dagger (I don't really have too much against her... but she annoyed me in the game. The FMV's focused on her too much... -_-) But I do not want to screw up things that much (Man, Vivi's only killed one person so far! _ Hmm, perhaps that will change)

No, I have nothing against Eiko, but she was a little brat when you first meet her That scene was when I was feeling _particularly_ silly. =P

   [1]: http://www.ivynajspyder.com



	7. Confrontation

Part 7: Confrontation

**Note:** ::sings:: This is the fic that wouldn't end, yes it goes on an on my friend! Some author started writing it, not knowing what she was getting into, and she'll continue writing it forever just because, this is the fic that wouldn't end- Ahem, anyway ^_^;;

Okay, I've been waiting WAY too long for Vivi to meet up with Kuja again, so I'm going to be rushing through stuff so I can finally get to that scene! Well, not rushing, but the majority of this will be summarizing since nothing (and I mean _nothing_) changes until they meet Kuja at the Iifa Tree

Oh yes, and since I forgot to mention it in an earlier part, I have one more person to thank for giving me inspiration for this fic. So, thank you Dean Koontz, for writing the book False Memory' which I finished reading right before I started this story, and it gave me lots of nifty ideas If you've ever read it, you should notice the similarities. =P (Heh, Kuja IS Dr. Ahriman! 0_o;; Er, nevermind, Kuja's not that much of a sicko)

**Innocence Lost**

**Part 7: Confrontation**

After the group ate a meal prepared by Eiko (with some help from the gourmand-in-training Quina), Zidane asked her about the Iifa Tree, or what the dwarves knew as the Sanctuary', that they had seen on the way there. She explained to them it was sealed with an Eidolon, and no one could enter. She refused to break the seal for them, however, but Zidane said they would go anyway.

They decided to get some rest before they left, of course. All except Vivi, who remained at the railing over the ocean, still pondering about things, specifically how he would face Kuja when they did finally find him

Zidane walked over to him again. "Vivi You better get some sleep before we leave tomorrow."

"I know." Vivi said. "But I still have a lot on my mind. I know you said not to think too much, but"

"That's because we're different, Vivi." Zidane said. "I mean, my problems are probably nothing compared to yours at this point. Think all you want if it makes you feel better."

"Sometimes it does, sometimes it doesn't" Vivi said as he gazed up at the clear night sky. "I worry that I really can't fight this. I know it's nothing I caused, but Zidane, I don't want to feel like this anymore. I don't want to keep thinking all these terrible things, and want to hurt you But what if we find Kuja, and there's nothing that can be done about it?"

"Vivi" He shrugged. "I don't really know. We'll have to see what happens. I don't know if this really helps, but I think most things boil down to two simple choices. You either do or you don't." He gave a half grin. "You'd think with so many problems in the world there'd be more answers. It's not fair but that's the way things are. The choice is yours."

""

He continued. "I just wanna protect the people I'm with. Doesn't matter whether I can or not. It's what I believe."

_He's right. He usually is about these things_

_Even if I can't change this I tried to do something about it. I didn't give in. I believe that I can change, that I can be normal again_

_That's all that matters_

_Right?_

"You wanna know a trick to getting your mind off things?" Zidane asked suddenly.

"?"

The next day, they headed for the Iifa Tree. Eiko had changed her mind about helping them, so she also went along. Though, judging by the way she acted around Zidane, she went more for the purpose of simply being around the much older boy.

The group arrived at the rather ominous tree, which was indeed surrounded by Mist which emanated from it. After Eiko broke the seal around the tree, they traveled along the huge masses of roots surrounding it, and eventually came to the tree and entered. The interior of the Iifa Tree was not unlike that of the one that formerly held the Cleyra settlement, being more like a series of caves than a tree.

After traveling to the tree's heart, they encountered a strange creature that told them the true nature of the Mist. They defeated it, stopping the flow of Mist, and returned to the surface where they returned to Madain Sari.

When they arrived, they learned that a precious stone, a symbol of the summoner's heritage as Eiko put it, had been stolen. Eiko was shocked, and felt that it was her fault and her punishment for breaking the seal at the Iifa Tree, but Zidane convinced her it was only the fault of the one who stole it.

Eiko and Vivi went off to search for clues, but Vivi quickly ran back to the others when Eiko was taken by Lani, the girl from Fossil Roo. There was a brief argument at the Eidolon wall, in which Lani almost retrieved the princess' pendant, but they were interrupted when a muscled, blue-skinned man, his bright red hair in a mass of dread locks on top of his head, dropped in. Dagger recognized him as a man with wanted posters all over Treno. The man, who Lani only referred to as Red' told Lani to leave the jewel and get out of there. Not wishing to get into a battle over it, she left Eiko and exited.

The strange man wished to fight Zidane for some unknown reason, and he accepts the challenge, though Zidane defeats the older man. The man seems to want to pursue the issue on how he could possibly lose, but he hands over the jewel that was stolen and also leaves.

Eiko comes to the decision to leave the village, even though she had promised her grandfather she wouldn't until she was 16. She takes the jewel with her, wearing it as an earring. Dagger explains to Zidane how she found out her own past, and how she was actually from the summoner village. She says they'll have to talk to Dr. Tot, because he may be able to better explain it all.

But before the group can leave, the are confronted yet again by the red-haired man. This time, Zidane asks him to join them, which makes no sense to the man. He says he will, if only to find out what makes Zidane so strong. They learn his name is Amarant, and they head for the Tree of Iifa

The group arrived where they had first entered the path leading to the great tree, and waited for a short time. Vivi was especially impatient, having waited what seemed like much too long, only to have Kuja not even show his face

"There's still a little Mist left, but at least no more is coming out." Zidane looked all around, trying to see any trace of the man they were searching for. "That must mean Kuja isn't here yet."

"What happened to the Mist?" Amarant questioned.

"We beat the beasts the breathes it!" Eiko said proudly. "So much for the Mist Continent!"

"No more Mist?" the red-haired man tried to cover his amazement. He added in a quieter tone, "They must possess incredible powers to accomplish such a feat" He looked over the group, and couldn't believe it was possible. Even though Zidane _had_ been powerful enough to defeat him, he still couldn't believe it. The boy had had help from who? Some prissy-looking girl, a little girl who he automatically disliked because she was a kid, (and he hated all kids,) and finally something with wings and a pointy hat that he wasn't sure what to make of. But Vivi was a kid, so he didn't like him either

Vivi couldn't care less at that moment. He felt the anger from before at Madain Sari rising in him, stronger now that it's cause was possibly near

_How could anyone be as cruel as Kuja?_

_How could he do this to me?!_

_And to all the others Creating the other black mages to be nothing more than puppets_

_I've suffered so many others have suffered too_

_I need to do something about it_

_ButWhat am I going to do when I finally see him?_

__

A loud roar suddenly echoed from the sky, startling them all. Looking up, the vague outline of the silver dragon could be seen, winging for the huge tree.

"Zidane, there's a silver dragon!" Dagger cried, pointing at the beast.

"It's him. He took me away on the dragon's back." Vivi said, remembering that day in Burmecia. "It's Kuja"

Zidane looked worriedly over at the black mage. Vivi's hands were clenched into fists, and the look in his eyes could only be considered one of intense hatred. Of course he had every right to hate Kuja, and since they would probably have to fight the man eventually, that hate may come in handy

The group made their way up the roots, until they came to a point where they could go no farther without passing the tree altogether. Then there was the daunting challenge of getting up the tree's massive trunk where Kuja and his dragon had already arrived.

"Can't we climb the tree?" Zidane wondered, but the others said it would be impossible for them to.

Vivi didn't say anything, and was looking intently upwards at the tree.

_Kuja's up there_

_I can't climb it but_

He looked over at one of his wings. He extended each of them outwards once or twice, testing them. They seemed to work just fine, but there was still the problem that he had never actually flown before. Glided, yes, but fly?

Zidane and Amarant had gotten into some sort of argument, but Eiko wasn't watching them. She was looking at Vivi suspiciously as he started flapping the wings slowly.

"What are you doing?" she asked.

"I'm going to fly up there." He stated simply, flapping them a little harder. That part wasn't very difficult; it only took a little effort. He had seen the Black Waltzes fly, so if he had wings like them, it would make sense that he could as well.

"What?!" the girl exclaimed. "You can't go up there yourself!"

"I can't wait any longer!" he snapped angrily, and she quickly quieted herself, for a moment at least, until Amarant walked past the two children, nearly knocking them over.

"Hey, watch where you're walking!" she shouted, but was ignored as Amarant continued arguing with Zidane.

Vivi flapped his wings harder, and lifted off the ground slightly. He fell back of course, but he was glad he was making some progress.

"Maybe I'm too big to fly" he mumbled, and all the while Eiko was protesting his decision. The others finally noticed.

"Vivi, what are you doing?" Dagger asked, even though it had become quite apparent as Vivi managed to rise several feet up.

"I'm gonna fly up there." Vivi said shakily, falling a bit as he got the hang of flight.

"Wait a second Vivi, we should all go up together!" Zidane argued, trying to reach up and grab the mage, but he was already several meters up. "Vivi!"

"He might leave!! I can't miss this chance!!" Vivi cried desperately. "I'm going no matter what!!"

"Vivi!!!"

He didn't listen, and using a strong gust of wind to his advantage, rose up higher toward the tree.

_ I _can_ fly This is kind of fun_

_Just don't look down_

He did anyway, to find he had already flown quite far up He felt his stomach do a flip, and he faltered slightly in his flight, but quickly continued remembering that he would definitely fall if he stopped.

Vivi could soon see Kuja, who was standing on the tree's winding trunk next to the dragon. Neither of them seemed to have seen him, though.

Vivi's flight finally took him level to the branch Kuja stood on, and he tried flying over to land. That proved to be the tricky part, as when he did touch down he stumbled and tripped, rolling forward several times until he came to a stop.

A stop that, unfortunately for him, put him right in front of a rather surprised Kuja and a very angry looking dragon.

Kuja wasn't one who let himself be surprised, but he allowed himself the one respite. Of all things he had expected to see, the little black mage had not been one of them. But there he was, in an ungraceful heap on the ground, staring up at him with his strange glowing eyes

He considered what might have happened to have caused the mage to come there, as Vivi scrambled to his feet, backing away from the two at the same time. He stumbled, but maintained his balance for once. Kuja looked over at his Silver Dragon for a moment, which growled low in its throat, possibly just as confused as he was.

Vivi's own emotions were in a turmoil, one part of him saying to run while he still could, another saying to stand his ground, and a third, much more unwelcome one joined in, trying to overwhelm him with its destructive ideas as it always did. Angrily, he pushed it aside in his mind. He wasn't about to lose control again, not when he had come so far

He forced himself to look Kuja in the eyes, despite the fact he found himself feeling the same way as he had in their last encounter: frightened, helpless

_No! I can't act like this, or I'll never be back to normal_

_But Why do I feel so afraid?_

_I can't be!_

Kuja was the first to say anything. 

"What are you doing here?"

Vivi narrowed his eyes. Kuja hadn't expected him to come find him?

"I didn't tell you to find me, puppet" Kuja continued. "You were to have killed that boy and the others, and wait for my return. Was that so difficult?"

"Wwhat?" Vivi said quietly. He shook his head. "I was supposed to kill them?"

Kuja covered his face with one hand exasperatedly. "Yes. Did you forget?"

_I don't understand_

_Was I just supposed to give in and listen to that other side?_

_Did he expect me to do that?_

"But it doesn't matter now." Kuja went on. "It was actually nice of you to come all this way saves me the trouble of finding you But tell me, why didn't you destroy them?"

" you thought I'd kill me friends?"

Kuja's calm façade slipped slightly, and for a moment he thought he'd been hearing things. "What did you say?"

Vivi found whatever fear that had surfaced start to fall away as all the hatred he harbored toward Kuja took it's place, and he took full advantage of the confidence it gave him. "You thought I'd kill my friends I couldn't"

"What, they were too strong for you?"

"No!" he shouted suddenly, startling both of them. "They're my friends, I could never hurt them! Nothing you could do to me could make me do that!!" Vivi thought of all the things that had happened, the times he'd had to spend fighting himself

_All because of him_

_That man in Lindblum died because of him_

_My friends were almost killed because of him_

_I almost killed myself because of him_

"I came here to find out what you did to me." Vivi said, his entire body shaking. Not with fear, however, but an anger he had never known he was capable of feeling. For a moment he considered letting the dark side of him assume control, and let it deal with Kuja in whatever ghastly fashion it chose. But killing the man, however gratifying, wouldn't solve his problem.

"Kuja I don't know why you did this to me. I just know I don't want to have these bad thoughts in my head anymore I came here to get you to undo what you did." Then his voice lowered threateningly. "And don't think I won't use force if I have to."

The silver-haired man was speechless. His mouth opened and closed several times, but no sound came. All he knew was what had happened didn't make sense. It _shouldn't_ have even happened. The mage shouldn't even be there!

Vivi waited for a response, for any other reaction. After what seemed like ages of waiting, Kuja smiled. Then he laughed, and Vivi felt an edge of his fear creeping back.

_Why is he laughing?_

"It didn't work." Kuja said, a touch of resentment in his voice. "Don't you hate it when a toy doesn't work properly? It's such a shame."

"W-what didn't work?" he asked, not able to keep a slight tremor from his voice.

"What I did to you. What you seem so desperate to get undone" Kuja explained. "This is really very interesting Obviously part of it worked, since you have those wings, but well, I think the rest should be fairly obvious."

Vivi shook his head. "What are you saying? I don't"

"I could explain it to you But for now we have some company." Vivi followed Kuja's gaze to see Zidane and the others running up on a parallel branch.

Vivi's heart leapt; they would be able to help him! Surely the threat of all of them would be enough to sway Kuja

"I want you to undo what you did." Vivi demanded, putting as much force as he could into his words. "That's one of the reasons we came here!"

Kuja barely gave the mage a sideways glance. "I admire your determination, my little puppet. But why would I do that?"

_I'll give you a reason_

He concentrated, focusing energy for a spell. Kuja noticed, and simply waited, no concern evident on his face. Nor did he flinch as Vivi cast Blizzara, strong icy winds blasting around Kuja to encase him in a huge crystal of ice. But to Vivi's dismay, it fell away in a second. Kuja casually brushed off several ice flakes from his shoulder.

"Is that the best you can do?" He said, raising an eyebrow. "You get points for trying." No sooner had he said that had he launched his own spell, a small blast of fire that served to knock Vivi off his feet. "I suggest you behave yourself, puppet."

Vivi climbed back to his feet as Dagger, Zidane, Amarant and Eiko arrived at a spot across from them on the root.

"Vivi!" he heard Zidane shout. "Are you okay?"

"I'm okay!" he called back.

_Yeah right_

_What do I do now? That didn't even faze him!_

_I could try a stronger spell_

_My friends can help me, though._

Vivi approached the edge of the branch, thinking to simply fly across the gap to be with them.

"Where are you going?" came Kuja's voice from behind him.

"Why would I stay with you?" he retorted. "My friends will make you undo what you did"

"You aren't going anywhere." Kuja stated imperiously. "I still have some use for you"

Vivi glowered over his shoulder at the man, and again went to cross the gap except he found he didn't want to.

_No, I I need to get over there, don't I?_

_But he said to stay_

_I shouldn't listen to him_

_No, I_

"Vivi!"

He looked over as Zidane called his name.

"Get over here!" the other boy shouted, waving his arms.

_Zidane?_

_I_

_I don't_

_What's?_

_Why aren't I?_

Vivi backed away from the edge of the root.

_I should stay_

"Very good." Kuja nodded. "Perhaps it wasn't as much of a failure as I thought But I'm sure I can correct whatever error I made Yes, I'm very sure you'll be helpful to have around."

_No no, he's_

_He's not going to undo it_

_I knew he wouldn't, but_

_I can get my friend's help_

_ I have to stay_

_I don't! Nothing is making me! I can go over there, I'll be safe They can help me!_

_I have no choice._

_No, I_

_I have no choice._

Zidane saw Vivi's action and couldn't quite understand it himself. Was Vivi listening to Kuja? That didn't make any sense

He turned to the silver-haired man. "Hey, you're Kuja, right?"

"Right."

"Okay then, now answer this: What the hell did you do to Vivi?"

"Vivi'? Is that its name?" Kuja glanced over at the mage, then back at Zidane. "Why do you care?"

"Dammit, we've been through a lot to get here, the least you could do is answer us!"

"Zidane." Dagger said quietly, giving him a pleading look. She also had her questions for Kuja. He hesitated for a moment, but then nodded.

"You talk to him, I'm gonna try and get Vivi." He told her. Zidane thought that perhaps Vivi had already found out what he needed to know, and he had some sort of plan

He doubted that, and began scanning the area for a way to get across to the root he was on. Much of his fear would be eased if Vivi was away from Kuja. Zidane looked over at him, and his worry that maybe Kuja had done something else to him grew.

_I I can't just I need to_

_What's happening?_

_Why can't I_

The little mage shook his head to try and clear it, but it seemed to only make it worse. Vivi tried listening as Dagger began to speak, but he suddenly found it hard to even stand as a sickeningly familiar wave of vertigo overtook him. Familiar, in that he had felt the same way a few times before.

In Lindblum, right before he'd

Unbidden, an image of the guard he'd killed flashed through his thoughts. Then, as if they had been waiting patiently for the perfect moment, the evil side of himself took advantage of his confusion and attacked, effectively shredding his already tattered resistance.

_I exist_

_I can't get upset I need to fight it I need-_

_I exist only to kill._

_I can't let it take over I have to get to my friends-_

_I exist only to kill!_

_No I don't, no-_

_I exist only to kill!_

_No I can't not now not after all this_

_I exist to kill, I exist only to kill_

_I can't stop it_

**_I exist only to kill!_**

For a moment the glow of his eyes vanished as he closed them, and when they opened, they were blazing red. The eyes focused on the group on the opposite branch, and he seemed to smile.

Near him, the dragon growled, looking intently out at the sea, where a fleet of boats could be seen approaching. Kuja laughed.

"So the curtain rises! Perfect, my canary. Let me show you the truth about your mother! First Act: The End of Ugly Desire. It's showtime!"

Everyone turned to see the ships come closer, and they were easily recognizable as Brahne's fleet. 

Dagger shook her head, clasping her hands to her chest. "II can't believe it!"

Kuja spoke again. "Your mother isn't satisfied with just one continent! Her ugliness and stupidity are truly impressive. Ahh Everything is proceeding as I have foreseen."

"What are you talking about?" Zidane asked.

"You're just the opening number. Time for the real show."

Realizing it was next to impossible to get a straight answer from him, Zidane turned his attention to Vivi. "Vivi, get over here! This guy's nuts!"

The mage's response wasn't nearly what he'd hoped for. Zidane's saw the burst of light, and had barely enough time to dodge to the left before the fires struck, blackening the Iifa branch he had been on and singeing the fur on his tail.

Vivi's hand glowed a second time, now with a crackling ball of thunder. He held it aloft for a moment, wondering if his friends' would make any move to counter him. But as he surmised, the shock of seeing his first attack hadn't passed.

In all but one of them.

The winged mage quickly lost his concentration, the spell fizzling out as something narrowly buzzed by his wing, taking of the edge of a few feathers in the process. The only information he could gather from it's passing was that it was very sharp, and had been thrown by the red-haired Amarant.

"The next one won't miss." He threatened, another round, blade-edged circlet was held in his huge hand to bolster his words.

"Amarant, don't!" Zidane exclaimed.

The man was baffled. "I just stopped that freak from roasting you."

"No, he's-" he waved his hands and growled with frustration. "I really don't have time to explain it, but don't attack him!"

Ignoring Amarant's threat, Vivi charged for a stronger spell, thinking to char him on the spot.

"Stop." Came Kuja's command. And Vivi did, the magics ebbing away. He stood quietly, as if awaiting further instruction. "So, it did work. Interesting" Kuja mused.

"Hey!" Zidane shouted, resulting in an annoyed sigh by Kuja.

"What now?"

"I know you're the one that did this to Vivi, so now I suggest you undo whatever it was before I-"

"Before you _what_?" Kuja interrupted. "Don't make me laugh. I didn't do anything more to him than he deserved. Besides, it really doesn't matter what happens to this puppet." He grinned. "You should be more worried about yourselves. The Mist may be created no more, but it still lurks in caves and forests, right?"

"Huh?!"

"I can make monsters with magic!" Kuja declared, raising his arms skyward. "Come forth, spawn of the Mist!"

From gaps between the branches, two huge, slug-like creatures covered with sharp plates appeared, strange patterns of lights flashing on what passed as their faces. They screeched, moving forward rapidly to attack. The group had no choice but to do battle.

As they fought, Kuja headed for his Silver Dragon. He paused next to Vivi. "Come with me puppet, you can deal with them another time."

Vivi hadn't been listening, though. It took every ounce of his will and concentration to fight back the darker side, and again he was slowly able to regain control.

Growing impatiently quickly, Kuja roughly grabbed the mage by one of his midnight blue wings, pulling him over to the waiting beast. Vivi cried out in surprise and stumbled, only to be pulled back up. Kuja saw Vivi's eyes back to their gentle amber yellow.

A look to his left showed the group having already taken care of one of his summoned beasts. Vivi had also seen them and tried to escape over to them.

"Didn't I say you're staying with me?" Kuja almost growled, debating whether or not to just knock the mage out as he had many times before. "I wonder if you're even worth all this trouble"

He made a gesture to the dragon, which extended a feathery claw to take hold of Vivi, who quickly ceased struggling in its grasp. He was tossed unceremoniously onto its back, and the dragon took off as soon as Kuja was on. The look Kuja gave him made him rethink any plans of flying back to the ground.

_Why is he taking me again?! What more does he want??_

_I can escape this time. I know I can fly_

_Or maybe I should just stay? Maybe I can get him to change me back_

He came the closest he could to visibly frowning.

_Why do I _really_ doubt that?_

_All I know now is this is may be my only chance to be normal again_

_I can't back out now!_

Kuja was standing as the dragon flew towards the now attacking ships, while the winged mage behind him was holding on for dear life. Kuja chuckled as he watched the monsters he created wreak havoc upon the queen's ships.

"Foolish Brahne! Your prized cannons are useless against the spawn of the Mist!" He laughed quietly. "But even a fool like you knows that there is only one path you can take, right?"

Vivi nervously rose from where he sat to get a better view of the proceedings at ground level, or rather sea level. They were high up, but he could see blasts from the cannons on the ships.

"Stupid elephant-lady! Why do you hesitate?" Kuja asked no one in particular. "Very well I'll make the first move. I'll give you a clean target. You can't miss! Silver dragon, descend!"

With a roar, the dragon did as it was told, flying down to the root-covered area around the tree.

"W-what are you doing?" Vivi asked.

"Silence, puppet. I have other matters to attend to. Just enjoy the ride for now."

Vivi looked back up the tree, and wondered if his friends were okay.

_Or maybe I should be worrying about myself_

_What do I do?_

_One thing's sure I can't leave until he undoes whatever he did to me_

_I'm a danger to everyone otherwise_

Kuja glanced back at him a moment, but returned to watching the battle below them.

_Or should I at least try and get their help?_

_They'd want to help me_

As the dragon landed, he spread his own wings with the intent of flying back over to the tree to find them, which Kuja noticed.

"Leaving so soon?"

Vivi glared at him the best he could.

"Do what you wish." Kuja said unconcernedly as he got off the dragon. "But if I were you, I'd stick around a while longer for the show. We have excellent seats."

_What does he mean?_

Then he saw the brilliant flash of light out at sea. He could just barely make out a huge ring of fire form over the waves, and in a brilliant light a huge figure, all wings and claws, appeared from it, rising into the air before flying at high speed toward the coast.

Straight for where he and Kuja stood.

He could see the summoned creature clearly as it slowed. It was a colossal dragon, and if it looked that big from a distance he could hardly fathom what it would be like up close. Its wings were most of the size, needed to be large to hold up its body in flight. From its head protruded three, backwards curving horns. Huge claws tipped every digit, including three huge ones on the tops of its wings. It was a truly awesome but terrifying sight.

And Vivi wanted nothing more than to be somewhere else.

The massive dragon watched them, though it appeared eyeless. It opened its gaping mouth, and a glow appeared as it charged its attack. 

_It's going to attack us._

_What is Kuja thinking?!_

Kuja was simply standing there as the legendary Bahamut fired several fiery blasts right towards them.

Vivi knew he wouldn't be able to fly away in time, so he got down on the dragon's back, wrapping his wings around himself protectively. He closed his eyes, expecting at any moment for his body to be consumed by the inferno

There was a sudden shaking, and a rush of air, and Vivi was very nearly thrown from the dragon's back. He did feel a rush of heat go past him, but nothing more. When he finally opened his eyes, he found Kuja had boarded the dragon again, and it was flying away from the explosions Bahamut had caused on the ground. The larger dragon roared as they flew past it.

Vivi couldn't see Kuja's face, but he did see when the he brought his hand from his face to see blood on the fingertips.

"Blood" Kuja laughed. "Excellent, Bahamut! Power, mobility You truly are the best! You even hurt me a little. And you, Brahne Your tragic role in this drama now comes to an end! I'm sure you'll enjoy the second act from your soul's hellish prison, since the stage will be your former home! The final act will take us away from Gaia, and I will kill my nemesis with my own hand! Hahaha, everything is going according to plan!"

_What plan?_

_What have I gotten myself into?!_

As he watched, Kuja raised his arms skyward, and dark, angry clouds started gathering overhead. At the center, what looked to be a gigantic eye appeared, looking down straight at the summoned Eidolon, as well as Brahne's ships. From the eye radiated strange beams. Vivi couldn't see how they affected the people on the ships, but the great dragon cried out and started thrashing as it was affected by them.

Vivi, who found he wasn't affected by this strange energy, looked down from the silver dragon's back as the beams stopped, to see the dragon king turn, and head straight for Brahne's ship. To his horror, the dragon attacked, easily demolishing the ships with blasts of flame. Then, its grisly work completed, it returned to wherever it came from, blue shining particles suspended in the air the only thing left after its departure.

_Why did it attack the one that summoned it?_

The dragon they rode turned away from the Iifa tree, and began flying east.

Vivi tried to keep himself from cringing as Kuja looked over at him. The man smiled. Vivi found he hated when he did.

"Aren't you going to leave like you said you were?" Kuja asked.

"No." Vivi took a deep breath before continuing, and tried in vain to hide how much his hands had started shaking. Though, considering the dragon's back wasn't very large, and Vivi didn't have nearly as much space as he'd like to have between him and Kuja, there was no doubt he saw. "You have to undo what you did. You said it didn't work so just get rid of whatever you did."

"Now, just why do you want me to do that?" he intoned, folding his arms across his chest.

"Because you had no right to do it!" Vivi cried.

"Actually, I believe I had every right in the world, my little _puppet_" Kuja's eyes narrowed, and he regarded the small mage with an icy glare. "After all, what makes _you_ so special you can escape your fate? It takes a lot of work to do that. What did you do?"

"W-what?" he stammered. "What do you mean?"

Kuja's grin returned, and he chuckled. "You wouldn't understand. You never will."

"If you won't tell me why, then what did you do?"

"Oh, I can tell you part of the reason why. I saw your potential. When I first created you, I had thought you were useless, a failure, and therefor when you were lost, I didn't pay much attention. You were only a prototype, after all." Kuja explained.

Vivi did a quick double-take. "A p-prototype?"

"I told you, though you shouldn't be able to remember most of that Yes, you were the first of the black mages, the original that I created Don't look so surprised. Where did you think you came from?"

"I I didn't"

_Maybe I thought that_

_I knew I was created like the other mages_

_But Kuja made me?_

"Well, now you know." Kuja said. "But, then I saw you again, and I saw how powerful you'd become."

"So you decided to turn me into another weapon like those other mages" Vivi concluded bitterly. What Kuja had said earlier began to make more sense. "It's because that was why you created me, wasn't it? I was made to be a weapon"

"You're catching on."

_But why does that make him upset?_

"I made some improvements, of course." Kuja went on. "An increase of your magic powers, the addition of those lovely wings" He reached out to touch one of them, but Vivi quickly pulled them both back out of reach. Kuja gave a brief laugh. "You should really be thanking me."

Vivi glared at him some more. "I know that's not all you did. You did something to my thoughts, and made me think all those things about hurting my friends"

"Yes, that" Kuja frowned. "I had to make some mental alterations. After all, what good's a weapon that doesn't want to fight? However they didn't work like I had hoped."

"What do you mean?"

"You fought the Black Waltzes, correct?" Vivi nodded. "It was similar to what was done to them A kind of programming', a set of commands which can be placed into someone's mind, which they should then be compelled to follow if it's done right. They shouldn't even realize they're being controlled. But the mind can be a tricky thing. I'm not sure what went wrong with you It only worked partially as far as I can tell."

Vivi nodded slightly. "Sometimes I can control it, and sometimes I can't"

"You shouldn't be able to at all. You shouldn't even realize it's there. I suppose I underestimated your willpower. You didn't seem to have much that I saw."

Vivi ignored the insult, trying to sort out what he had learned.

_So I'm supposed to be a cold-blooded killer, like all those others_

_I'm not supposed to be like this_

_I'm not supposed to feel regret for my actions_

_This this is worse. If I can't always control it_

"Can it be undone?"

"Yes."

"But you won't."

"Of course not. What, did you think if you asked nicely I would? Oh, you could try attacking but I can assure you my powers are still far greater." Kuja brushed his hair from his face. "Like I said, you'll be very helpful, especially considering there is no more Mist to make black mages with."

Vivi's thoughts instantly went to those of the hidden black mage village, and he wondered if Kuja could know about them. He looked out past the silver dragon's wings to see the barren, rocky terrain of the Outer Continent. It was awfully far below

"What's to keep me from just flying back to my friends?" Vivi asked. "Or maybe just jumping off and letting myself fall? Then you couldn't have your weapon."

"I could stop you if I wanted. Besides" Kuja's eyes glittered knowingly. "You won't try to leave."

"Why not?"

He chuckled. "Well, it may have something to do with the extra added programming which compels you to obey me Though personally, I think you wouldn't anyway."

Vivi couldn't help looking away. Kuja spoke the truth; he knew he couldn't leave. He'd be back where he started. What could he do, go back to his friends? No, he was a danger to them. Nor could he return to the black mage village. How would they react if one of their kind suddenly became violent and began slaughtering them without reason?

He shook his head, half in frustration, and half to disguise his movements as he used the back of one gloved hand to wipe away the tears that had started falling down his cheeks. He told himself he couldn't cry, it wouldn't help anything, but everything felt so utterly hopeless

_All this and I can't do anything. I'm destined to be Kuja's slave, a tool of war_

_Maybe you really can't escape fate._

_It's not fair_

Vivi laughed in spite of himself.

_I sound like some spoiled child. Life isn't fair Even Zidane said so_

_But I'm scared I'm so scared_

Kuja must have noticed the tears anyway, but acted as if he didn't know the reason for them. "Why are you so upset? You said you had been trying to find out where you came from, what your purpose is Now you know."

"When did I say that?" Vivi asked. But Kuja only shrugged mysteriously.

_Probably when he changed my thoughts_

He felt suddenly horrified at the notion of Kuja picking around in his mind, able to see every one of his thoughts, his dreams

_It doesn't feel any better to know why I was born_

_I was born to be a weapon_

_I guess that means I have to be_

He hated thinking like that. He only did so in an attempt to make his situation not seem as bad. After all, if it was inevitable, what's there to regret?

"I still need to decide just what I want to do with you" Kuja remarked. "I could keep you as you are"

"No!" Vivi exclaimed before he thought. "I mean"

Kuja raised an eyebrow. "You wouldn't like that, would you? It's tempting, but don't worry, I can't keep you like this" And few moments later, he said, "We'll be at my desert palace soon. Maybe you should get some rest, puppet. And when you wake up, you'll have a whole new outlook on life."

Vivi's eyes clouded with confusion. "What? No, I" A second later, he felt incredibly drowsy. Had flying taken that much out of him? No

_Why does he always have to do this_

__

It was dark, but he recognized the darkness. It was inside his own mind. He briefly wondered just why it was so bleak most of the time, but then he readied himself for what he knew was coming.

A pair of glinting red eyes greeted him from the darkness, and a form, his form, came into existence around them.

"Hello." The other him' said. Vivi didn't bother to return the greeting, and for some reason the other him found this amusing. "What, we aren't on speaking terms anymore?"

"Go away."

"Nice to see you again, too." The other said drolly. "I'm afraid I can't do that, you see-"

"I know, you're me. I've heard it before." Vivi paused a moment. "Are you the programming?"

The other made a vague gesture with his hand. "I'm an incarnation of them, if you will, attached' to your less pleasant thoughts. Yes, even you, have a dark side, even if it is a really pathetic one."

"What's going to happen now?"

"You know what."

Vivi clenched his hands into fists. "Yes. But am I just going to be" he struggled to find the right word. "E-erased? Will it just be you in my body?"

The other rolled his eyes. "Hardly. I'm not a mind in myself, I'm just part of your thoughts. Kuja wants an intelligent soldier, not a mindless doll."

""

"It really isn't too bad if you think about it." The winged him said, and began walking slowly around him. Vivi at first turned to face him as he did so, but then stopped as the other circled. "You hated being what you were before, right? Kind of half-evil?"

"Yes."

"You'd like to be normal again."

"Yes."

"Why? What, you want to be weak again? Don't you remember how you were pushed around all the time? You would sit down and cry" The other laughed. He was behind Vivi, and the little mage angrily began to turn to face him, but he cried out as the other's hands grabbed his shoulders. 

Though Vivi couldn't actually feel anything on the strange mindscape, he could swear he felt a terrible cold from the other him, one that was more painful to his mind and soul than his physical body. He wasn't even really sure if he wasn't feeling anything, but at that moment he wanted nothing more than to be away from the dark mage

He pulled, but it was like he was frozen in place. He couldn't do a thing.

The other chuckled, low and menacing. "Didn't you ever get tired of being pushed around, Vivi? Didn't you ever want to do something? Make them feel like you did Hurt, frightened" he hissed, right next to Vivi's head.

Vivi wanted to scream. The piercing cold feeling had spread, now seeming to consume his whole being. He couldn't stand it.

"Didn't you?" the other asked more forcefully.

_Have I?_

_I never wanted to hurt anyone_

_No! I-_

The cold became worse, now almost burning. He still was unable to scream, though he found he could speak.

"Y-yes!" he choked, not thinking of the words that spilled from his lips. "I hated them for it! I wanted them to stop but I was too afraid to do anything!"

"You don't want to be weak. You want them to suffer in your stead. All those who have ever mocked you, ridiculed you for what you are"

"Yes" Vivi said again, and felt the cold recede.

_Do I?_

_I've had people say horrible things to me_

_Bastard' demon'_

_They just didn't know better_

"They knew They knew how much their remarks hurt you."

_They were just afraid They thought I was like those mages who hurt people_

_But even before then people were mean_

_I've always been the outcast_

"I don't want to be weak" Vivi said quietly, and the cold receded more.

"You want to have a purpose?" the other asked.

"I guess."

"You know what it is."

_It's not what I want it to be_

"Think about it" the other began. "Think of all the suffering you've had to go through Wouldn't you like to teach the ones who mock you a lesson? A lesson in the form of a firey death by your hands"

"No"

The cold returned quickly, now threatening to overwhelm him. He twisted in his winged twin's grasp, but could not escape.

_I might have thought of it_

_But I'd never do it!_

_Maybe they deserved it Maybe some of them were horrible people_

_But I could never live with myself_

The other laughed again. "Oh, but what if it didn't matter? Anyone who opposes you could die as swiftly or painlessly as you please, and it wouldn't matter. Just another pathetic life, they come and go all the time. Why not make the most of it?"

"Make the most of it?"

"Doesn't the thought of having lives as mere toys in your hands interest you?"

""

_Killing no No! It's wrong_

"By who's standards? The strong survive Are you strong, or are you weak?"

"I I'm strong"

_I hate being weak_

_But I was always too afraid to overcome my weakness_

"Your magic makes you strong."

"My magic"

Vivi found he could move, and he looked down at his hands. He pictured himself back at Lindblum, the guard standing there, totally unaware his destruction was nigh

He felt the pure energy flowing off his fingertips, the electricity dancing momentarily across the stones before launching at the target. The man's screams don't sound as terrible as he remembered

_I enjoyed it_

He had. He couldn't deny that. In fact, in that one moment he had felt wonderful, tremendously happy

_Was it true happiness?_

_Or something false, created by the programming?_

"You could have fun" the other said.

"Fun?"

"Yes"

_No no it's_

_My my power_

_But but what about_

"You have no choice." The other said sternly. "You know what you want and don't want. You know this is right."

_I don't want to be like I was_

_I don't want to feel remorse_

_I don't want to be weak_

"Your purpose"

"My purpose"

_won't even feel like they're being controlled'_

_'_

"You exist"

"I exist"

"You exist only to kill."

"I exist only to kill."

The other's eyes gleamed in triumph. "You exist only to kill."

"I exist only to kill." Vivi said, and felt he cold receded completely, succeeded with an indescribable feeling of warmth and, more importantly, power. He laughed. Why had he fought it? Everything seemed so much better

But he could shake his feeling of how wrong everything was. It was terribly, terribly wrong, though he couldn't see just what it was. He felt he should be more bothered, but at the same time, he felt it didn't matter.

He laughed again, feeling the silky blue and black wings which slid from his back. His eyes flashed red.

"I exist only to kill!"

End Part 7

Note: ::backs away nervously as the crazed Vivi fans moved in, brandishing pitchforks, torches, and the like:: GAH! ::runs:: No, don't hurt me! ::hides behind Kuja:: Here, it's him! He's the one you want! ::tosses the girly man to the crowd, giving her time to escape:: It's his fault!!! He made me do it! EEP! ::ducks as things are thrown::

Okay, I know, I'm a horrible, cruel, terrible person, having it so even after all that, there's nothing Vivi can do But there really isn't if you think about it! Kuja's still a helluva lot stronger than he is, so really, what is Vivi gonna do to make him change him back? And Kuja sure as heck isn't gonna do it of his own will. Besides, writing a completely evil Vivi is the **whole reason I wrote this fic!** I just took a long time to do that (So yes, in theory, chapters 4-6 are pointless. Bleh.) ::slinks off into a dark corner, clutching her plush Vivi doll which she has pinned fake wings to the back::

To explain some things like how Vivi survived Bahamut's attack. Well, er, because I said so? (Hey, it works for your parents) I re-wrote this chapter 5 times, and this was the best, and least confusing of them Remember, this whole d*mn thing was a big experiment I wasn't expecting to get past chapter 1, and I've never been known to plan too far ahead So Anyway I hope you like it so far. ^_^


	8. Forsaken

A/N: ::sneaks in:: Well, here I am, after a RIDICULOUSLY long absence ^_^;;; (What has it been, six months?) I always get writer's block over the summer ::sigh:: And it decided to stick around for a while this time 

Actually, I did finish this chapter several months ago but it sucked. A lot. And since this is supposed to be a big turning point in the story, it had to be frickin' _perfect _ya know? =) So I rewrote it about a million times, got some help from friends, and this is the final result It still sucks. =P

AND, since I keep forgetting, if you would like to see the spiffy fanart (and doujinshis, heee!) people have contributed for the fic, please go here. =) **http://www.ivynajspyder.com/ilfanart.htm**

Oh yes, special thanks to: 

My IRL friends Katie, for listening to me blab about ideas she didn't even really understand, and Cathy, for reading over the chapter for me.

Also again, Saria San, for also listening to my ideas and giving pointers earlier on!

Sad Mudokon, for giving me some awesome ideas and suggestions, helping me continue this chapter when I was horribly stuck, and for doing incredibly kicka$$ fics and art. ^_~ 

And to No. 421, for giving her own different view of the story, and allowing me to see it from a different perspective, and also for doing kicka$$ art and fics. =P And also, all the people who give me reviews. ^_^ You are all super spiffy, and I really couldn't have continued the fic without you. ::gives you all Evil Vivi™ plushies::

Wait a sec something's been bothering me here. ::goes through the story quickly, liberally applying some 'Ellipse-B-Gone':: There we go! I needed to thin out those buggers a bit. ^_~ 

**Innocence Lost**

**Chapter 8: Forsaken**

* * *

Kuja wondered, not for the first or last time, why he did not just kill the black mage then and there.

Vivi sat motionless on a table, leaning limply to one side and looking for all the world like some strange, life-sized doll. But still, a living doll that, if one knew how to accomplish it, could be manipulated as easily as any marionette.

At least, that's what Kuja hoped. Altering the mage's mind to his whims was more difficult than he had ever expected. He had never expected the shy, insecure child to have such strong will power, but he'd corrected his past mistakes. There would be little or no chance of such a thing happening again.

Yet he still doubted. While he had perfectly sound reasons for doing all this, in his mind anyway, it seemed like too much trouble, too much of a risk. His plans had been too carefully laid, too meticulously planned out to chance losing everything he'd worked for because a toy decided to suddenly rebel.

Kuja had his reasons for what he did. If asked, he'd simply state he wanted Vivi for a weapon, and when he'd seen the mage had decided to take advantage of the situation Undoubtedly there was more to it; even he knew that.

He still had thoughts that it might be much easier to just snuff out the little mage's life right at that moment. It might spare him some grief in the future, but Kuja hesitated. It wasn't that he liked the mage, of course. He held a deep revulsion for all of the black mages, though this one had garnered the tiniest amount of respect from him. Vivi had strength and intelligence that far surpassed the few other 'aware' mages he'd come across. Kuja did like him over the other mages; after all he'd created Vivi himself.

That did however explain why he hadn't simply turned Vivi into some mindless golem, instead making him believe that Kuja's way was right, the _only _way. It was similar to the Black Waltzes; he wanted a soldier with a mind. This way could be difficult, but the results could be very promising. It would be such a waste to get rid of such a powerful weapon.

Kuja's features were graced by a slow smile, one that showed no trace of geniality.

"You've given me a lot of trouble, puppet" he whispered to the mage, who showed no signs of responding. "But I won't kill you. You will still be useful to me"

He waved his hand, casting a spell that would awaken the small mage.

* * *

Vivi's eyes flickered to life slowly, the soft glow a sharp contrast to the darkness of his face. For a moment, the light was a bright topaz, gentle and warm But then it changed, twisted into a piercing red glare. But it did not remain so, as before. The red faded It almost mixed with the original amber, so only a crimson tinge was apparent.

He felt dazed, and for several moments everything was unclear. The room around him was unfocused, as were his thoughts. He shook his head in an attempt to clear it, but there seemed to be a million voices speaking at once. Vivi briefly felt like he was going mad

Then, very abruptly, everything was crystal clear.

The little mage adjusted his hat, more out of habit than anything else. He felt different somehow. Not in a particularly bad way, in fact he found himself feeling better than he had in weeks. He felt, almost content. He couldn't explain it, but why try to explain it when you feel fine?

Vivi felt the surface he was sitting on, the edge of a table. Then he looked up finally, to see Kuja standing only a few feet away, looking upon him with a slightly suspicious gaze. He looked right back up at him, tilting his head in silent question.

"So feel any different, my little puppet?" Kuja finally asked.

The little mage tilted his head a little farther, the end of his hat falling to one side. Kuja's expression became irritated.

"Stop with the cute act I didn't take away your ability to speak."

"I feel" Vivi began, hesitating. "I I don't know."

The fair-haired man seemed perturbed, and moved closer, still taller despite the fact Vivi was up on the table. "You mean to tell me you don't feel different in the slightest?"

Vivi glanced around a moment, confused. "Well different compared to what?"

"How you were before, of course. You remember, don't you?"

_How I was How I was? Before before what?_

"You finally saw the truth, my little puppet. That it is futile to resist your purpose. Isn't that right?"

_My purpose I was created to be a weapon. I was created to kill_

Bits and pieces of the events of the past few weeks came back to him. He could remember when Kuja had taken him away at the Iifa Tree, and even their conversation up to the point he'd been knocked out.

He remembered the dream; he remembered that part quite vividly, in fact. One side of him felt he should be bothered by it. Wasn't it wrong? He wasn't like that

_ It's right. I was the one wrong to fight it, to fight the truth. It was a fluke that I didn't become how I was meant to be I didn't know better. Now Now I know._

_Why did I fight it?_

_I was pathetic before I was just like the other aware mages; perfectly happy with staying the same way, not trying to achieve a thing_

_Why did I fight this? I have power Why haven't I ever used it to my advantage?_

_I was afraid to I was, and it made me weak I was afraid of too many things, and I hated it. I probably don't need to be afraid anymore Now everyone else can be_

"I remember" he answered, his voice gaining confidence. "I don't know why I fought it"

"Weakness." Kuja stated simply. "You were too afraid to embrace your power."

He nodded, and smiled slightly, unseen as always. He didn't remember many times he'd been able to in the past months. He was more than content, he found himself feeling positively elated.

"I feel better." He said suddenly, finally answering the first question. "Much better"

"Very good." Kuja said as he backed away. Vivi hopped down off the table, brushing off the back of his jacket. Looking up at Kuja, he saw a troubled expression on his face.

"What?" he asked, wondering if he'd done something wrong. Not that the thought of upsetting Kuja struck him as particularly bad But then, he knew deceptively frail-looking man was in truth extremely powerful It would be safer not to cross paths with him.

Kuja waved his hand, shaking his head as he replied, "Oh, nothing really. It's just, I'd have to say you're a bit on the cute side for a weapon."

"Oh Okay." He said, not sure how he felt being referred to as cute'. "I really can't help it"

"Of course not. Like I said, it's nothing." He took a moment to push back the strands of hair that'd fallen across his face. "It's good that we got all this straightened out Now, since you're going to be helping me, I'll have to show you around my palace."

"Helping you how?" he questioned, giving the man an inquisitive look from beneath the brim of his hat.

"Just do what I say, when I say Simple as that." He turned, heading for the doorway.

_If I don't? _He was tempted to say, but he felt he knew the answer to that.

_I'd rather not find out_

He nodded, and went to follow Kuja.

* * *

Vivi had never had a chance before to fully appreciate the beauty of the hidden palace. Every other time he'd been there, he'd been utterly terrified, and certainly in no condition to admire the architecture.

But now that he was feeling better, he took the time to look around. The place was amazing, with the statues, inlays and stained glass everywhere you looked. It also must have been quite expensive and taken a while to build. How had Kuja acquired such a place?

_He probably found it Or stole everything._

It seemed the main way of moving about was by the teleport pads, which could be controlled by thinking of where one wanted to go Or where Kuja wanted you to end up. After he'd been shown the necessary places, Kuja left to go to his study, and Vivi remained at one intersection in the hallway he particularly liked. Kuja seemed confident in letting him go off on his own. He had only stated he wasn't to go messing around in any of the rooms in the palace.

At the center of the intersection was a life-sized stature of an angel, a beautiful winged woman carved from white stone. In a gruesome contrast, it was flanked by two pike-wielding demons, each carved from black stone. Vivi rather liked the contrast

He looked up at the angel statue, the stone woman's arms raised heavenward.

_Odd Why does Kuja have angel statues? The demons make sense, but_

_Kuja's pretty odd I feel strange when he's around But he's been nice to me, so I don't know what to think_

He looked at the two snarling demons, and decided he liked the angel more; it made him feel calm.

_Do only angels have white wings?_

The little mage cocked his head to the side, a bit surprised by his own query.

_If the feathers are blue or black what does that mean?_

He shook his head.

_Well I'm not an angel, I don't count._

Vivi turned his glowing eyes away from the statue for a moment, looking at an odd, dark crystal only a few steps away. It was completely round, set on a pedestal. He'd never seen a stone quite like it; it seemed to absorb the light in the room. He reached out, curious, and touched it

The stone glowed! He flinched back, afraid he'd done something he shouldn't have But nothing seemed to happen. At first. Across from him, a set of clear, crystal-like steps faded into existence, stretching up and over the intersection.

__

The little mage tested the first step cautiously. It held, and he started climbing.

_Kuja didn't say I couldn't look around the halls a bit He won't care._

He arrived at an unfamiliar hallway, and hesitated. He didn't know how big the palace was, it could be easy to get lost, and he didn't want to face Kuja if he wasn't able to find him later.

The little mage really couldn't explain how he felt about the still mysterious, and overtly feminine man. He didn't seem like the terrible person that he seemed to recall him being. He'd been treating Vivi well, so far. Though Vivi did distinctly remember hating the man

That had been because of a mistake, though. Kuja hadn't intended for Vivi to go through all that That terrible conflict between two sides in his mind, which he truly thought would have eventually driven him mad. He'd only tried to show him his true purpose, when he'd been searching for one so long And he had fought it, and that was the consequence

_But but he's the one responsible for making the black mages as tools of war Didn't I hate him for that?_

That thought kept nagging at the back of his mind, annoying and insistent. A calmer, seeming more rational part of his mind gave its opinion.

_Then again, without him, none of us would exist at all._

Looking up, Vivi quickly remembered why he'd stopped in the middle of the hallway in the first place.

_I guess I can explore later_

Vivi paused, started to turn back until he heard something. It sounded like singing? Someone humming perhaps Whatever it was, it sounded very close.

He debated silently for a moment, looking back once or twice, before heading down the hallway resolutely. He listened carefully at each door he saw, until he was sure it was the loudest at one.

Vivi raised his hand to knock, pausing again.

_Wait who else could be here?_

_Kuja didn't mention anyone What if it's some weird monster? He did say monsters walked around the halls_

He seemed to smile, just a bit.

_Well, if it is a monster, I'm sure I can deal with it._

He knocked anyway.

The singing stopped abruptly, and there was a long period of silence. Vivi knocked again.

"Who who is it?" came a female voice, surprise evident. "Kuja?"

"No, it's not Kuja Um" he faltered. "Can I open the door?"

"Well, yes, I suppose"

He pulled the door open, stepping inside the room. Indeed, there was someone there, and a human. She was an elegantly dressed older woman, still quite beautiful despite her years. Aside from her, the small room contained a bed, a dresser and a chair, which she was sitting on.

Vivi stood in the doorway several moments, wondering just why she was there

"Well hello there." She didn't seem all that fazed as seeing the winged mage. She even smiled warmly. "You may come in."

He blinked several times. "Oh. Right..." He stepped into the room, not sure why he was doing so, or what he should say. "Who are you?" It seemed the right thing to ask.

"I am Hilda Fabool." The woman replied, and made a gesture in his direction. "And may I ask your name?"

"Fabool?" Vivi repeated; the name sounded familiar... "Wait As in, Cid Fabool?"

"Yes, I am his wife." She still smiled, though a definite look of sorrow came to her eyes. "I have been Kuja's prisoner for quite some time It's been a while since I've had company."

"Oh, I'm sorry" he said lamely. He wasn't sure what else to say But he decided he liked Lady Hilda. She seemed very kind, and it would be nice to be able to talk to someone aside from Kuja. "Well, I'm Vivi."

"Very pleased to meet you I haven't seen you before, Vivi. How did you come to be here?" she asked, folding her hands in front of her. "Oh! I'm sorry, how rude of me. You can sit on the bed if you'd like."

"Thank you." Vivi nodded, going over to do so. "Um I just got here a little while ago. I'm not really a prisoner or anything It's kind of hard to explain"

Hilda frowned slightly. "You work with him?"

He nodded. "Is that bad?"

"Well" she pursed her lips. "That would depend on your point of view, I suppose I doubt his intentions are very good, considering the things he tells me. Though I swear, that man speaks just to hear himself." She rolled her eyes a bit. "I've never met anyone so obsessed with themselves."

Vivi allowed a grin to come to his face, thought it was unseen. "He's nice to me, though. He just says I have to do what he tells me."

Hilda had one eyebrow raised. "In all honesty, I'm not sure what he expects to have a sweet child like you do for him No offense."

_ If you only knew_

"None taken." Vivi waved his hand. "Um how come Kuja kidnapped you?"

"Oh, I believe that it wasn't completely intentional He said he'd wanted the Hilda Garde I, I just happened to come with it. I was quite frightened, one minute I was riding away from Lindblum, thinking about how absolutely furious I was with my husband, and the next thing I knew this huge dragon was landing on the ship" She shook her head sadly and sighed. "I have to say I regret turning my dear Cid into an oglop _Not_ that he hadn't completely deserved it at the time." An amused glint came to her eye, banishing her sadness for a moment. Vivi tilted his head to one side; this wasn't what _he_ remembered hearing about what had happened

"So, here I am. And I believe the only reason Kuja didn't do away with me is because he needed someone around to brag to."

Vivi smiled again, the expression just barely seen in his eyes if you looked close enough. "I know Cid misses you a lot He really seemed upset when we saw him in Lindblum."

Hilda's eyes went wide. "When did you see him?"

"Oh, um, around the Festival of the Hunt, when I was with my friends" he explained, a sudden strange feeling coming to him when he said the last part. He couldn't quite explain it it was just odd. But he shrugged it off.

"I see" she said, a more somber expression on her fine features.

Vivi fidgeted a bit; it had suddenly gotten too quiet. Sensing that maybe Lady Hilda wasn't up to any more conversation, he got up to leave.

"So soon?" she asked quietly, still smiling sadly. "It was really nice speaking with you, Vivi"

He nodded. "You, too Maybe I'll stop by again later." She nodded back, and he left the room, hurrying back down to the intersection in case Kuja was looking for him.

(Quickie A/N: Um Raise your hand if you're wondering Hey, Vivi's not being evil! Heck, he's being like he always is!' For one, he's not _completely _evil. He's just a bit different now. Okay, very different. ^_^;; I'm taking it slow, okay?! And also, Lady Hilda rocks! I had to include her in the story somehow! Okay, done now. Continue, or run while you still can and save the remnants of sanity you still have =P)

* * *

As it turned out, he was. Vivi looked down from one of the higher steps, and Kuja glared up, arms folded across his slender chest. Vivi figured getting down _quickly_ would be the better course of action so he jumped.

He still hadn't gotten much practice in actually flying. Gliding was easy. He spread his wings wide, making slight adjustments in the feathers when necessary and made his first perfect landing on the floor below.

_Not bad Kind of fun, actually. _He gave a short, vaguely amused chuckle. _I'll never have to be afraid of heights again._

Then he remembered Kuja, and looked up, relieved to find the man didn't look particularly angry.

"I was just looking around." He stated plainly, shrugging his shoulders like it wasn't anything to make a big deal about. "I didn't touch anything"

Kuja smirked. "Don't lie You had to have touched the bloodstone to activate those stairs" Vivi cringed slightly. "Stop that, I have no reason to punish you. We have to leave now."

"Where are we going?"

"You'll see It's not very far. I think you'll enjoy seeing our destination, my little puppet." Smiling and unfolding his arms, he walked to one of the teleport pads, stepping on it to vanish in a flash of light and strange symbols. Vivi followed to do the same, reappearing in a cavern of sorts, a hulking figure seen outlined against the stark brightness outside.

The figure was the _Hilda Garde I _that Lady Hilda had mentioned, and that was where Kuja was approaching. Vivi hurried to keep up, stumbling once on the stone steps. He arrived at the ship's entry ramp, walking up to join Kuja at the bridge. After making some last minute checks, the ship took off.

* * *

"So where are we going?" Vivi asked as he examined a large map of Gaia on a board in the bridge's corner. That area was for navigating, and all sort of different tools were scattered about. On the map, he recognized quite a few of the place he'd been; Alexandria, Lindblum, The Iifa Tree It was amazing how far he'd traveled in such a short time.

He really didn't expect an answer. He'd tried asking Kuja several things since he'd woken up, and he was either ignored, or given a very vague explanation. But this time, Kuja glanced over at him from where he was at the wheel. "You'll see when we get there. But you've been there before"

"How do you know?" He lost interest in the map for a moment.

A strange look came to the other's eyes. "You told me."

"Oh." Vivi blinked in confusion, not sure if he remembered telling Kuja anything about where he'd been. "When did I do that?"

"When I" Kuja paused, frowning. "It really doesn't matter. I'm sure you'll like where we're going"

Vivi watched him for several long moments, but the man wasn't going to say anything else So he was left to mull over it.

_Well I'll see when I get there_

* * *

The Black Mage Village was exactly as Vivi remembered it; save for the fact the residents nearby were now in a state of shock. This was expected, considering he and a strange human had just walked right in like they owned the place.

Vivi had recognized the dying forest as soon as the airship had landed outside, but he'd said nothing. He found himself not feeling anything at first Not even surprised.

He looked over at three of the mages who had gathered across the small clearing at the village's entrance. They were whispering to each other, casting worried glances over at him and Kuja. Vivi suspected the only reason they hadn't simply run away was his presence there.

Kuja was scanning the tiny village slowly, a disinterested look on his fine features. He looked down at the small mage next to him, nudging his shoulder. Vivi looked up, his expression more unreadable than usual.

"Well, what do you think? I thought you'd like seeing this place again"

Vivi looked away a moment, looking over the small, ramshackle huts that made up the village. It was almost cute, how the mages had even fashioned them to look like themselves, two windows on one side like eyes, and pointed straw roofs 

Vivi had felt somewhat confused, and somewhat grateful the first time he'd seen the village. He might have felt he'd found his place, somewhere to call home for the first time, had it not been for his mindset at the time.

Now Now he was confused again. He wasn't sure how to feel just yet

"It's nice." He frowned at his choice of words, and looked back up at Kuja. "But Why are we here?" That was the next pressing issue What did Kuja want with a bunch of broken' black mages?

"Oh, but I would think that was obvious There is no more Mist to make black mages, and I'm afraid any mages left on the Mist continent have been destroyed by the people there" he explained while adjusting the billowing sleeves on his outfit. "And I need some extra help with my palace and the airship. These mages here will do just fine."

Vivi nodded, or at least half-nodded before asking, "But what if they don't want to?"

"Oh, they will." Kuja replied, smiling slightly. "I have something very special to offer them They'll practically jump at the opportunity."

"I see" Vivi looked over at the three mages, now reduced to two. One had probably gone to tell the others. He stretched his wings, wondering what Kuja could possibly offer the black mages.

He saw Kuja also look over at the mages, and start to walk over to them. He had barely taken two steps when the remaining mages scattered, moving with surprising speed to disappear among the huts. Only the occasional glow of amber eyes from the windows attested that anyone was in the village at all.

"Well shy, aren't they?" He looked over at Vivi, lifting an eyebrow. The little mage shrugged.

"I should have mentioned they don't really trust humans." Vivi told him, his tone conveying that it should have been obvious.

"And I figured as much Why do you think I brought you along?" Kuja beckoned him to come over. He complied. "You've been here before, so they'd know you They'd certainly trust you, right, my little puppet?"

Vivi nodded. "What do I have to do?"

"Tell them I only wish to speak to them I don't suppose they have some sort of leader?"

"Kind of." He said, thinking of No. 288, and looking in the direction of the cemetery. "I'll see what I can do"

"Very good" Kuja smiled with a hint of satisfaction, and Vivi headed off into the village.

The winged mage didn't see anyone else outside as he walked past the huts at first. That situation didn't last long, as some of the mages, upon seeing him without the strange human, rushed out to greet him. There were three, two A types and a B. He wasn't sure of their numbers; it was rather hard to tell them all apart.

"Vivi, you're back!" one of the A's said gleefully. "It didn't take very long"

"Did you come with your friends?" the second A asked.

"Where'd you go? The Iifa Tree?" the B asked. "I've always wanted to go there"

Vivi backed up a bit, taken aback by the sudden onslaught of questions. "Wait, just wait"

"Sorry" the first B said, rubbing the back of his head. "We're just excited."

"I realize that" Vivi muttered. "But I'm kind of in a hurry Do you know where 288 is?"

The B's expression became immediately concerned. "You sound upset Is something wrong?"

Vivi waved his hand dismissively as he tried to move past them. "No I'm sorry, but I have something I need to do." With that, he ran off towards the cemetery.

The three mages exchanged glanced. Both A's looked at the B, who shrugged.

"I hope everything's okay" one said, frowning. 

"Yeah" the other agreed. "But"

"What?"

He shook his head. "I don't know Didn't his eyes looked a bit weird?"

The A tilted his head to one side. "Weird?"

"I thought so, too." The B said, nodding. "They looked different" He looked in the direction of the cemetery. "I wonder why he's in such a hurry, though?"

* * *

It had always amazed Vivi how absolutely silent the cemetery was Aside from the gentle rustle of the wind moving among the long grass and flowers that grew on the small mound, there was no other sound. Even the few birds that inhabited the forest were silent, almost as if out of respect.

Vivi found himself wanting to just stand there for a moment, and not disturb the stillness But he knew what he'd come there to do. No. 288 was standing there solemnly, and what he thought of as he looked out across the burial mound was unknown to the small mage as he climbed the short stairway.

He started to speak, faltered, but remained silent. The other mage didn't turn. Vivi found himself remembering the last time he'd spoken with him

_I was worried I was afraid of facing the truth _he though bitterly. _What will he think of me now? No, he wouldn't understand I don't think any of them will._

_I don't care Why would I care?_

He swallowed hard, unsure why it was so hard to speak. "" Again, he stopped, but it seemed he didn't have to say anything as 288 turned and saw him at last. A smile immediately came to his normally somber yellow eyes.

"Vivi! Welcome back." He greeted, and Vivi couldn't help but notice the relieved note in his voice. "We didn't expect you back so soon"

Vivi gave a half-hearted shrug. "Things don't always turn out how you expect"

If 288 was confused by Vivi's response, he didn't show it. "Are your friends here as well?"

"No"

"Hmm? You came here alone?"

Vivi sighed. They certainly were into asking him questions today "No. I'm here with someone else, though." He frowned, fidgeting slightly. "I should just hurry this up Kuja's here, he wants to talk to you all."

Now, 288's expression was unreadable. He looked down at the smaller mage for several moments before shaking his head, confused. "Kuja? You said he was the one who hurt you, didn't you?"

"Yeah, I guess I did" he said quietly. He suddenly found it quite hard to meet 288's gaze, and tried looking off to one side. "Things have changed A lot of things." He swallowed again; his throat had suddenly gotten quite dry. "Well, he said he wanted to speak with you all"

"This is unexpected." Vivi looked back at the other mage's darkened face. He looked angry? No concerned? He wasn't sure. "Are you okay?"

"What do you mean?" He narrowed his eyes slightly, beginning to get irritated. "I'm perfectly fine Better than I was, anyway. Anything would be better than that"

_Right?_

The other mage remained silent now. He looked over the grave markers, and said quietly, "I'll go see Kuja He won't try anything, right?"

"I don't think so." Vivi waited a moment, but when it seemed 288 wasn't going to say anything else, he left the cemetery, feeling oddly confused.

_I knew it I knew it he wouldn't understand this None of them will._

_But that shouldn't matter to me. I know this is right. I know what I want_

He tried to focus on that, but he was still preoccupied enough that when he hit an uneven part of the path he stumbled and fell. Kuja had apparently seen this as he heard a high peal of laughter as he pulled himself off the ground.

"Nice going Maybe you should try putting those wings to use so you don't break something."

Vivi frowned, not sure whether to be angry at Kuja, or himself for stumbling But he said nothing as he walked back over.

"He'll be here in a little while." Was all he said before moving a few steps away to look at the village. A few moments later they both looked over as a type C mage walked into the clearing. He nodded to Vivi, and the small mage could see he looked worried.

Kuja stepped towards No. 288, smiling genially. "How nice, you came But what about the rest of you?"

The pair of amber eyes narrowed. "Tell me what you want with us, then maybe I'll call them."

Vivi was surprised he could safely say he'd never heard a mage's voice take on such a hard edge. Interested to see how it would all unfold, he stayed back and listened.

"I would really prefer if you all would hear what I had to say I promise, I don't mean to harm any of you." His expression seemed sincere enough, but it was doubtful 288 would trust him, given what little he knew about the strange man Kuja smiled, and looked over at Vivi. "I wouldn't, would I?"

The mage hesitated, glancing over at 288 before shaking his head.

_He needs them to work for him It wouldn't do him any good to hurt them_

Kuja raised his hands, palms up, and smiled once again. "You trust your own kind, don't you?"

"Fine." Vivi barely heard 288's reply before the bigger mage trudged off into the village to get the others.

_He isn't very happy about this I guess I'd expect that, though I wouldn't trust humans all that much, either._

_Can they trust Kuja? And what could he possibly offer them?_

He poked at a tuft of grass with the toe of his shoe as he waited, until Kuja spoke up. He didn't feel much for holding a conversation, but then you really didn't need to say anything when it came to Kuja.

"It's always been a bit of a mystery why they wake up" This statement got Vivi's attention quickly. "I suppose it was some fluke that I neglected to remove after the prototype stage. You never did wake up when you were with me, though."

"What do you mean?" he asked, his curiosity piqued. He didn't really remember much of anything before he lived with Quan. His first memory was of falling, with the ocean terribly far below and then being jerked up from certain doom, a fishing hook caught on his jacket.

"You don't remember anything from before, do you?" he asked, and Vivi shook his head. "I used you to show Queen Brahne I could truly create magical weapons for her She was quite impressed, even though you really couldn't do anything..."

"Then what?" he asked on impulse.

"Hmm? Oh, you were lost somehow during a transport from Treno A fault of those two idiot jesters."

Vivi nodded. He was mostly amazed that Kuja had answered his question so easily.

_Then Quan found me_

_But it was an accident There's no reason I shouldn't be here_

The little mage turned his gaze down again, glancing up on occasion as the village's denizens gathered in the clearing, nearly all of them pausing to look over at the solemn winged mage off to the side.

"Look, it's Vivi!"

"Who's the human he's with?"

"I dunno Mr. 288 said we should be careful though."

"I wonder what he wants?"

Kuja waited, though less than patiently, until he appeared to have all the mages' attention. He was smiling, though Vivi wasn't sure if he was trying to look friendly, or maybe something about all this amused him 

"For those of you who are wondering, my name is Kuja" he started off, loud enough for them all to hear of course. There were some scattered exclamations from the few mages who knew who he was, but he ignored them. "And I'm here with an offer for you all."

"Like a trade?" a type A called from the group.

"A trade? I suppose you could call it that" He paused a moment, flicking his hair from his face. "For what I'll give you, all you have to do is return to my services Come work for me." He said, adding the last bit when several mages looked confused. The rest looked rather angry, and there was a bit of shouting by the ones who understood.

"Why should we work for you? Humans never did anything for us!"

"You'll just make us fight again!"

"How can you ask that??"

Kuja waited for them to calm down before continuing. "I know, it is a big thing to ask But you'd be more than rewarded, for in return I offer you something quite valuable" He let the sentence hang in the air for a few moments, folding his arms over his chest. "After all I'm sure you're all aware of the limits placed on your lives, am I right?"

This brought on a rather confused silence, and rather quickly. Some of the gathered black mages looked worried, and other just looked confused, looking to their brothers for confirmation. Vivi found himself glaring at Kuja. He wasn't going to somehow threaten them with _that_, was he?

"I was one of the ones responsible for your creation." Kuja said after several moments. "I know about your limited lifespans, but, I also know how they can be lengthened. All I ask is for some assistance for a short time."

288 stepped towards the pale man, who turned to look down at him. "You swear that you can do something like that?"

"Absolutely. I have no reason to lie to you."

Vivi crossed his arms over his chest, as surprised as the mages were, and just a little slower to believe it

_Would he really do that?_

"I'm giving you all the choice" he heard Kuja continue. "I'll even give you some time to decide I'll be outside this forest in my airship. I'm sure Vivi here can show you all where it is, right?" He gestured to the smaller mage, and naturally the eyes of all the villagers turned to look Vivi cringed a little, turning away so the brim of his hat blocked his face. He suddenly didn't want to face them all, and he didn't know why

He heard footsteps, and looked up just as Kuja was passing him. "Kuja."

The man paused, turning to him. "Yes?"

"Are you serious about this?"

"You mean what I told all of them? Why does it matter to you?"

The little mage frowned slightly. Why did it matter? "I'm like them, aren't I? Are you going to extend my life, too?"

Kuja raised a dismissive hand, and turned to leave the village. "No need, puppet. You were the prototype You were made to last much longer than these mass-produced ones. I really wouldn't worry"

Vivi watched him leave, his passage through the illusion around the village rippling the shield temporarily. He glanced back over at the black mages, who had started speaking quietly, though an excited undertone was indeed present.

"They all want to believe him"

Vivi looked up at 288; he hadn't even noticed him walking over. "Maybe they should."

He shrugged slightly. "I wasn't expecting any of this. I was prepared to deny anything he could offer us But this"

"Too good to pass up?" Vivi offered. "I can understand that"

"Can we trust him?"

Vivi sighed. He had a feeling he was going to get asked that one a lot He answered as honestly as he could. "I have no idea."

"Why are you with him, then?" 288 asked, sounding more than a little frustrated. "I don't understand what happened to have changed your mind Did he promise you the same thing?"

"Extend my life? No He said since I was the prototype for the black mages, I'll already live longer."

He nodded slowly. "Then why?"

Vivi thought for a moment. One answer seemed more prominent, though he wasn't really sure if he agreed

"Kuja he kind of helped me." He said in measured tone. "He showed me how my life could be better It just didn't work the first time, because I didn't want to accept it" The words felt odd to him, like he wasn't really speaking them But the more he thought about it, the more it seemed to fit

288 didn't appear to agree in the least, and indeed he looked rather shocked. "Vivi I What you said before"

"Maybe I was wrong Maybe I'll be happier working for Kuja. But you probably wouldn't think that though, would you?" He looked up at the taller mage, tilting his head slightly to one side. "I was created for a purpose. I had no aim in my life before this I was just going to go on oblivious until I finally just stopped' or died or whatever the hell it is, and never be anything more than a whimpering little coward!!" Vivi hardly realized, but by then he was almost shouting. All of the assembled mages were staring over at him, and 288 didn't have any idea what to say

"I don't think you could understand" Vivi finally said, very quietly, and began walking over to the other mages, to see if they were coming or not. Again, he felt a large hand on his shoulder, only this time he shrugged it off. 288 didn't seem all that daunted.

"Something's changed, Vivi You're acting different. The others who've talked to you think so too." He said behind Vivi, as the winged mage narrowed his eyes, irritated and uncomfortable with 288's concern for him "Even your eyes look different. I know something's wrong. Why can't you tell me?"

He turned sharply, his eyes suddenly blazing red, but only for a moment. The light seemed to darken as he regarded 288. "You remember what we spoke about when I first came here, right?" 

The bigger mage nodded, a little hesitantly. "You said Kuja had hurt you in some way Something he did to your mind."

"Yeah But I found out later, I'd made a mistake Or Kuja did. I just know that's not what was supposed to have happened"

"Then what was" he asked tersely.

"That was my punishment for trying to doubt what was true about me But I probably would have never realized it otherwise"

288 was silent for a moment, thinking of the conversation in the cemetery "You also said that what happened made you want to hurt people Is this what that's about?" Vivi spent a moment wondering if 288 sounded angry at all. He still wasn't able to tell, but why would he be angry? Why would Vivi care if he was

"Part of it is" he answered. "It's my purpose. Why black mages were created at all" Vivi found himself smiling slightly, unable to be seen anyway The color of his eyes shift back to amber for a moment "Sometimes it doesn't make sense at all Other times, I can't see why I ever doubted it It's so hard to explain I don't know if I care about killing anyone. I know what Kuja wants from me. He wants a weapon So I found my purpose, why I was born. But it's really odd I've finally realized something I should have a long time ago. I don't need to be afraid, or to be the one at someone else's mercy I'm a black mage, after all. None of us really have anything to fear from most people." He laughed a bit, and looked at 288. "I just think that this might be what's right. And that I'll be happier like this."

288 didn't say anything, and Vivi was thankful for it. He strode purposefully over to the other mages, all of whom had been completely silent. They gave him some apprehensive looks, but otherwise they still seemed excited over the current events.

"W-what was that about?" a type A asked timidly. "Are you mad at 288?"

Vivi shook his head. "It's just" He faltered, then shook his head again. "Are any of you coming?" Judging by the confused looks that met him, they hadn't really decided yet. He sighed, folding his arms over his chest. "What's the problem?"

A C type stepped forward. Vivi reminded himself to find out their numbers later "We were all wondering Since you came here with Kuja, maybe you could tell us about him?"

"Is he mean?" a B type piped up to his left. "Um, just wondering"

Vivi shrugged. "I haven't known him very long. But I suppose as long as you do what he says, you're fine"

"Oh S-so you think we can trust him?"

"I didn't say that. It's not my decision to trust him, so it really wouldn't matter."

"B-but you're with him!" an A type exclaimed. "If he wasn't trustworthy, you wouldn't be, right?"

Vivi actually laughed, a low, humorless chuckle that unnerved more than a few of the black mages. "I can't say I'm with him by choice More of an obligation."

"Ob obligation?" the A repeated. "What's that?"

_Gods, they're all going to start asking about it now I need to just get them going_

"Kuja isn't going to wait forever." Vivi said quickly. "Just make up your minds. Please." He added it as an afterthought. It would do them all good to hurry it up.

A C stepped forward. "We need a few minutes, is that all right?"

"I guess."

Vivi stood off by himself again, waiting as they discussed it a bit longer Part of him wondered what they were talking about, but maybe it wasn't any of his business. Finally, the C type spoke to him again.

"Most of us want to go Some of us still want to stay, if that's okay."

"It's fine." Vivi said, shrugging. "The airship is right outside the forest. I'll come with you all in a minute"

The winged mage watched most of the village's population exited through the illusion, and waited several moments. He saw two mages over by the chocobo shack, obviously the ones who were staying behind. One other remained

"Aren't you going?" Vivi asked 288 as the other mage started for the cemetery. He stopped, turning to face him, and shook his head slowly. "Why not?"

Another pause. "I'm not sure."

"Aren't you worried about them?"

"Of course." He responded defensively. "But"

"You could ask them to stay, you know." Vivi offered. "They'd listen to you."

"I know that. And they also trust you It's probably why most of them went." 288 sounded almost upset, and Vivi could swear he should feel guilty but guilty for what?

"Maybe they should have Or would you rather all of them stay in the village for the rest of their lives?" the winged mage countered. 288 said nothing again, so he shrugged and turned for the exit. 

Vivi waited another moment before he heard 288's voice once again and once again he stopped.

"Vivi I'm still not sure if I understand what happened. I'm sorry if something terrible has happened and I can't help you For now, I'd just like you to promise me something."

"Yeah?"

"Please make sure that they're all safe. I feel I can still trust you."

Vivi turned slightly, and nodded. "I will We'll be in the desert east of the mountains. If anyone asks." Without another word, and before 288 could reply, he ran out of the village and into the barren forest beyond.

A/N 2: It's done It's finally DONE! WOO HOO! ::does a happy dance:: Well, chapter 8 is done. =P Good enough

Er... since no dount you're all thinking 'But Vivi isn't EVIL! Waaah!' I must explain... See, there are actually several versions of this chapter. At first, I tried making 'Evil Vivi' like how he was portrayed in the dreams. But it did NOT work. It came out sounding terribly forced and just... bad. So I kept rewriting it, trying to get his personality right... And I actually have it right this time, more or less! I really just want to take it slowly... (Yeah, and drag out this thing even MORE... ^_^;;) 

So, what to expect in chapter 9? Less of a wait, for one! ^_~ Also, Vivi will show his 'evilness' (maybe...), and there'll be black mages galore! Yay!


	9. Destruction

****

Author's Note: ::waves:: See, I didn't take as long. ^_^ Anyway, I hope ya like this chapter... I tried to make it more interesting, but... ::shrug:: Well, one more chapter to go, and then... You'll see! =) Though, first..

****

Notes on Magic - Now, this is important. (I think! =) It's about how I perceive the affects of black magic in terms of this story. Or something. =) So hear me out, otherwise you may be a little confused!

The game mechanics are one thing. Vivi's magic almost always hits, it takes hit points… But that's it. Do we see the monsters with burn marks from a Fira spell? Do they get hopelessly squished by Doomsday? (Or does your party, for that matter?) Nope, of course not. It just doesn't work with the game mechanics.

This doesn't work for purposes of the story. In 'real life', it just _wouldn't_ work that way. In fact, it doesn't in the game. Ever notice how magic use is different when it's outside of battle? It was instant KO for those people in Burmecia. If you think about it, even a little Fire spell would severely injure any person in the FF9 world. Even someone like Zidane.

So, naturally spells like Firaga, Thundaga, Comet, etc, would kill any normal person. Hell, they'd kill even our 'heroes' if they didn't take precautions. I'd imagine some people can have high magic defense, like Kuja seems to, something like Shell to shrug off the effects… It'd hurt, it just wouldn't be lethal. Things like monsters have an unusually high resistance to it, so they can take many more hits. But humans are pretty frail creatures…

So, that's how it'll work here. But wait, you say now Vivi has ridiculous amounts of power? Well, that's true, but if you remember from non-battle scenes in the game, magic works differently. In some scenes Vivi actually had to _aim_ his magic in order for it to work. It's not just a matter of selecting the enemy. In some ways I'm using something similar to the FF Tactics battle system: The stronger a spell, the longer it takes to cast and charge up for. During that time, an enemy can move out of the targeted area, and the spell will miss. (It can be annoying in that game. ^_^)

Vivi can throw all the little fireballs and icicles he wants, but the chance of them hitting anyone is slim. If he wants to use a bigger spell, it'll take him longer, leaving him vulnerable. But he has spells like Slow and Stop to counter. So hopefully, it all balances out. =)

Then bring White magic into the equation. Even someone covered with third degree burns from Firaga can be saved with a quick Curaga. =) I'd imagine so, anyway… (Though I do believe that you don't actually 'die' in the game's battles. Passing out or maybe being 'near death' makes more sense… Life is more of a revitalizing spell than anything, and couldn't bring anyone back from the dead, maybe from the brink of death… Otherwise no one would die, they'd just bring 'em back every time! ^_^ Same thing with Phoenix Downs. It also fits with the whole FF7 'If Sephy killed Aerith, why didn't they just use a Phoenix Down on her??" ^__^)

Then we have that thing with people 'fizzling out of existence' after they die. Nope, not in this story. ^_^ They remain messy corpses to lie around until someone does something about 'em… Same with monsters. (Eeew…)

I say this now because I'm planning of having some fun battle scenes… Just so you don't go 'WTF?!' Enjoy!

Innocence Lost

Chapter 9: Destruction

* * *

The rustle of dry pine needles and the occasional snap of a twig were the only sounds to mark the passage of the line of black mages walking through the Magladene forest. No one could really think of anything to say. Some of them were so unsure of the whole business a few minutes before, they feared that voicing any doubts would cause themselves, and everyone else, to lose what little courage they'd managed to work up.

Still, there was an air of excitement. The offer did seem too good to be true, but they had very little to lose. Their numbers were dwindling; it might be their last chance at normal lives. Or as normal as they could possibly get…

An A type lagged farther behind the others, occasionally pausing to look behind at their home they had decided to leave much to willingly. He couldn't see it of course, with the illusion there, but he wasn't looking to get a last glimpse of the village.

"Is something wrong, 32?" came a hesitant voice near him. The mage jumped a bit, relaxing when he saw another type A, whom he recognized as No. 12 despite the fact all the A's looked exactly alike. He looked rather concerned. "Are… are you gonna' go back to the village?"

He shook his head quickly. "No! I mean… I wasn't thinking that or anything… I was just wondering why Vivi isn't here yet."

"Oh… Well, I think he's still talking with Mr. 288."

"He sounded pretty upset, though. You think they were fighting about something?"

The other A tilted his head, pointed hat bobbing slightly. "I don't know why they'd be fighting. Vivi and Mr. 288 are friends."

"He was shouting…"

"I really wouldn't worry," 12 said hurriedly, looking back up the path to see how far ahead everyone else had become. "C'mon, we can't wait around all day. He'll show up, I'm sure."

36 nodded slightly, and they both quickened their pace to catch up with the others.

* * *

Kuja leaned against the side of the Hilda Garde, his arms folded and his eyes closed. The airship was several yards from the edge of the huge forest, where dead trees gave way abruptly to dead, dry land. The sun was high overhead, just starting it's decent from noon, though the temperature was bearable since it was early in the year. Still, the Outer Continent could be a harsh place… If Kuja felt any amount of respect for the black mages being able to survive in this land, he wasn't going to admit it.

Two emerald blue eyes opened, scanning the tree line. Still nothing. He hadn't expected for it to take this long, but luckily he had some time to spare.

"I hope my dear 'Vivi' is doing his job…." Kuja thought aloud with a wry smile. Though he hadn't meant it initially, it was kind of a test for the mage, to see just how deep his loyalty ran. After all, if he didn't trust Kuja, it was doubtful he'd let others of his kind join him. It also allowed Kuja to keep from spending any more time among the simple bunch of mages than absolutely necessary…

Still, they were certainly taking their sweet time.

Kuja sighed loudly, pushing away from the side of the airship. He was actually quite patient, but waiting around in the sun and wind-blown dust for a bunch of broken dolls to show up wasn't something he was all that thrilled to be doing. Though, he reminded himself, it's this or do all the work on the airship and such yourself.

Vivi hadn't been much use in that area. He wasn't big enough to see over the wheel of the ship, so steering was out of the question. Kuja began to wonder if his chance to put him to some use had already passed by completely, but he refused to see it like that. He'd gone through too much trouble…

He saw a flash of color out of the corner of his eye, easily distinguishable in the bland landscape. Several black mages walked from the forest towards the airship. Kuja smiled, waving slightly.

"I love the gullible ones…" he mused quietly as the mages approached. There were quite a lot; he counted at least fourteen. It would make life so much easier to have something around to do all the manual labor. Kuja could himself, undoubtedly, but he thought it would be better to recruit some of the mages… After all, they weren't good for much else.

His grin faded slightly… Where on Gaia was Vivi?

The first mage to arrive was a C type. "Ah… Hello, I'm Mr. 239," he greeted, looking more than a bit nervous. "Most of us decided to come, if that's all right."

Kuja smiled again, trying to maintain a friendly appearance. It wouldn't do any good to scare them off now. "That's perfectly all right."

"Oh, good… So, what do we do now…?"

"For now, I want all of you on the airship. I'll be up in a few minutes to give you further orders."

239 nodded, and he and a few other mages headed up the ramp onto the ship's deck. Two of them stopped short, however, a B type tilting the rim of his hat at he stared up at the Hilda Garde, eyes wide in wonder.

"Wow… I've never been on an airship before!"

The A type next to him, No. 44 judging by his size, looked a bit less enthusiastic. "You have, you probably weren't awake yet. I sort of remember… The one from Dali." He shuddered slightly. "It was really scary…"

Kuja muttered something incomprehensible. "Just get _on_ already," he said, his patience beginning to drain… The mages hurried up the ramp. Just as the last one, an A, was about to get on, Kuja put out his arm, stopping him.

"Where is… ah, Vivi?" he asked. The mage blinked, fidgeting a bit.

"Um… I dunno. I-I tried waiting for him, but, um…" the mage trailed off helplessly, shrugging. Kuja frowned and shoved him roughly up the ramp, turning back towards the forest. There was a flash of blue…

"Oh, I see him!" the mage behind him cried happily. "He must have talked with 288 some more."

Vivi was on his way towards the airship, though much too slowly for Kuja's liking.

_Hurry it up, my little puppet…_

* * *

Vivi had been purposefully walking slowly, to avoid having to talk with the others. For some reason, he didn't feel much like talking. The little mage nearly jumped at the sound of Kuja's voice in his head. He did stop, though, trying to figure out if maybe he was going crazy or-

_I _said _hurry up. I don't have all day!_

Nodding quickly, and unnecessarily, he covered the remaining distance to the airship much faster. He stood in front of a rather peeved Kuja, panting.

"You're late," he remarked, raising an eyebrow. Vivi just shrugged, trying to get his breath back. "Other than that I'd say you did just fine…" Kuja walked up the ramp onto the _Hilda Garde_.

Vivi was a bit confused by what he meant, but only shrugged and followed him onto the ship. There he was met with over a dozen wide-eyed stares of the assembled black mages, all of them wondering what they should do next.

Kuja grinned widely, clasping his hands before him as he regarding the nervous group. "Well, now that you're all here… It's time to get to work," He looked over them for a moment, his gaze stopping on a type A. Vivi recognized this one; No. 44. "You there… Do you know how to pilot an airship?"

The mage gestured to himself uncertainly. "Um, m-me? Well… I think I did, b-but I don't remember very-"

"Good enough," Kuja said, before moving on to another mage to assign a different task. He soon found out that most of them didn't have the vaguest clue as to what he was talking about, but he'd more or less expected it. Though growing impatient, he took some extra time to show them how the ship worked.

Vivi trailed some distance away from him during this time, waiting to see if maybe he'd get something to do. He was started to get kind of bored…

When at last most of the mages were given something to do, and the rest told to stay in one of the storage rooms, Kuja gave the order to take off. Once they were finally in the air, Vivi noted that Kuja seemed to be in a much better mood than he had been. Indeed, the pale man's temper had been teetering on a razor edge as he tried to explain things to the black mages. Vivi really couldn't understand why he felt that way… He couldn't very well blame them for being inexperienced.

"Wasn't that fun," Kuja said sarcastically, coming up next to where Vivi stood on the deck. The little mage looked up slightly, questioningly.

"What do I do?"

"…Hm? Oh…" He paused a moment, frowning. "There really isn't anything for you to do. At least, not yet."

"Not yet?"

Kuja gave one of his more mysterious grins. "I'm sure you can find something to do once we get to Alexandria."

Vivi stared up at him in surprise. "A-Alexandria? Why are we going there…?"

"To see the coronation of Princess Garnet, of course… Undoubtedly she will become the new Queen with that elephant woman dead."

_Alexandria…? Dag- Garnet… would be there, he's right… Would everyone else…? …Why does it matter, though? I'm not supposed to be with them._

"I guess…" Vivi half-mumbled, looking away from him.

"It'll be a while until we get there," Kuja said as strode over to the ship's navigation charts. "Find something to keep yourself busy, and try not to bother me…"

He nodded, going to the hatch that led to the interior of the ship which housed the engine and storage rooms. The _Hilda Garde I _wasn't a very large or fast ship, but it was still the only one of its kind being able to run without Mist. Vivi certainly preferred it to riding the Silver Dragon.

After a bit of trouble opening the hatch, he climbed down the steps into the dark hallway beneath, the sound of the wind around the ship replaced by the steady thrum of the engines. He went to the only open door, entering the room to see six mages sitting around on crates and sacks. They all looked up at seeing him, and for the most part looking happy to see the smaller mage.

"Hi Vivi!" a type A said enthusiastically. In addition to him there was a C type, two B's and two more A's. Vivi only recognized the type C as Mr. 234. At least, he thought it was 234… "I-Is everyone else okay?"

Vivi nodded. "They seemed fine, um…"

"I'm 32, remember?" the mage supplied helpfully. "That's 56 and 78," he gestured to the two A's. "And that's Mr. 163 and 144… And that's Mr. 234."

"Oh… What's with the 'Mister'…?"

"It's polite to call people Mr. or Mrs., isn't it?"

Vivi nodded slightly, and sat on the nearest crate. 32 seemed a little disappointed when he didn't say anything, but he'd apparently decided to leave him alone for the time being. However, not all of them felt that way, as No. 144 then walked over to him.

_Please don't start asking questions please don't…_

The little mage couldn't explain his sudden aversion to talking with them… They were just curious, and you truly couldn't blame them for that, considering how short their lives had been so far. And, wasn't he the same as them, after all?

_We aren't the same… I'm not as weak as they are._

…does that matter?

Of course it does.

"Vivi, do you remember what you promised?" 144 asked suddenly, shaking Vivi from his thoughts. When Vivi just gave him a blank look, he explained. "Before you left last time… we asked if you could tell us about the places you visited."

No. 163 overheard. "I remember that. Have you been anyplace interesting yet?"

"I've always wanted to see the Iifa Tree," 56 said, a little wistfully. "But the dwarves said you could only go if you went through the 'ceremony'… I asked if maybe me and 28 could do the ceremony thing so we could go, but they said they weren't sure if we could, since usually it's a boy and a girl who do that."

"What _is _the ceremony, anyway? I still don't get that."

"I saw it once. They just stand around on that boat thing while the elder dwarf says some stuff. I don't see what the big deal is."

Vivi cleared his throat loudly to get their attention once again. "You were asking me…?"

"Oh yeah…" 144 said. "Have you been there?"

"Yeah, I have, in fact…" Vivi replied, a rather odd grin coming to his eyes.

"Was it nice? I heard it was really pretty." 78 asked eagerly.

"Well… It's kind of creepy inside of it… Lots of monsters."

78's eyes grew nearly twice as wide as normal. "You went inside it??"

"Yeah. We had to go really far down into the roots… and then…" He faltered, the words stuck in his throat for some unknown reason.

_We stopped the production of Mist… I did it so… so no more black mages could be made to be tools of war…_

Why… why did I do that…? That's their… our… purpose, isn't it?

Why did I doubt it then and not now…? Is it because-

He was suddenly jerked back into reality as a big, white-gloved hand settled on his shoulder. "And then…?" 144 asked, pushing him a bit. "Hello? A-Are you okay?"

Vivi looked up at him, blinked twice… And nodded. "I'm… I'm fine." He slid down off the crate, the colors of his eyes swirling in a disturbing manner. "I don't feel very good. I gonna go back up to the deck now…"

Without saying anything else, leaving some very confused and worried black mages, he hurried back out of the dim room and hallway onto the wind-blasted bridge outside.

144 stared down the hallway through the open door for a moment before turning back to the others. "…Did you see?"

"See what?" 32 asked.

"His eyes… They looked weird again."

"I didn't see."

"Well, look closer next time. You'll see what I mean…"

* * *

In Alexandria, there was a mix of mourning and anticipation among the great city's people. Queen Brahne had been pronounced dead, and despite her more recent acts of tyranny, there were still those who believed her to have been a good ruler. But now her beautiful daughter Garnet was to be crowned in three days, and become the city's new leader.

Preparations were already underway at the castle for the coronation, and the overall mood was cheerful throughout most of the city. Naturally, this wasn't the case everywhere…

Zidane leaned over a table at one of Alexandria's bars, one half-empty glass near him as he attempted to find solace in the false comforts of alcohol. His tail was limp on the floor, and basically everything about him screamed 'depressed'. He even went as far as punctuating the moment with an exaggerated sigh.

Perhaps the thing that bothered him the most was he couldn't quite 'prioritize' what was upsetting him.

Vivi was gone, taken _again _by that madman Kuja. Zidane couldn't help blaming himself, after all he'd only been a few meters away when it happened, he could have- No, he reminded himself, it never did any good to have regrets about things like that. There was probably nothing he could have done…

Dagger was as good as gone, as far as he was concerned. He'd entertained thoughts that he'd be allowed to stay with her… but she was going to be the Queen, for crying out loud! Why would she need him around anymore? He didn't stand a chance…

A glance to his left showed that Blank and Marcus were standing nearby, trying to figure out what was on his mind. He ignored them, preferring to be left alone for the moment. He figured that he was allowed to be upset on occasions, after all he'd just lost two very good friends.

The blonde thief watched passively as his fellow Tantalus members left a few minutes later after Ruby showed up, having given up trying to get even a word out of him. He resumed staring at the wood grain of the table, idly toying with the glass. Maybe… maybe he'd go see Dagger later. She was probably just as depressed as he was…

He suddenly gave a short, humorless laugh as he realized something… He could always see Dagger again, even if it was only watching from afar. And he'd probably be seeing Vivi again, too.

Only the next time, it would most likely be on opposite sides of the battlefield.

In a sudden flare of anger he pounded the table with his fist, his tail thrashing in a flurry of movement. He muttered a few curses under his breath, all directed at Kuja, and rubbed his slightly aching hand. Kuja had been responsible for all the hell they'd been going through, after all. What had happened to Dagger, to Vivi, everything.

He winced slightly as he remember someone still had to tell Steiner what had happened to Vivi… He would have when they'd first arrived, but the knight had been so thrilled to see Dagger again, he hadn't had the heart to say anything. Steiner had almost looked up to the young black mage, and certainly held him in higher regard than he had Zidane. Still, someone had to tell Rusty sooner or later, before he found out in some less desirable way.

Zidane sighed. It was all too much… He sincerely hoped things would go relatively well from that point on. He'd go see Dagger, and watch the coronation ceremonies… And maybe, someday, he could even find Vivi again, and bring him back…

* * *

Garnet looked solemnly out her bedroom window, one hand on the large crystal pendant around her neck. She looked tired, strain evident in her deep brown eyes. Zidane had been right on how she was feeling, apparently. She also appeared to be thinking about something important…

"Steiner?" she called, turning towards the door. Instantly the loyal knight answered, entering the room.

"Yes, Princess!"

"Um…" she began, her eyes downcast and hands clasped before her. "I'd like to find Zidane and talk to him."

"Princess, you have more important matters at hand!" Steiner said incredulously, shaking his head. "You live in a different world now!"

She nodded without conviction. A moment later she heard him clear his throat, and looked up again.

"Princess, may I ask a question?"

Garnet almost smiled. "Steiner, you don't need to ask…"

"Ah, um, yes, of course…" he managed to stammer out, looking embarrassed. "I was wondering about this, but never got the chance to ask, what with so many things happening… But I simply must know… where is Master Vivi?"

Garnet looked away… She knew he was going to ask about that, and had thought to eventually tell him anyway. The Princess had sudden pang of guilt as she was reminded of it, since she'd been upset for not trying at all to help the little mage when he had still been with them. While she had had her own problems at the time, she felt as though she could have done _something, _even if it was only talking to him, offering a bit of consolation…

Steiner started to grow uncomfortable at her silence. "Um… Princess?"

"I'm sorry…" she said at length. "Vivi… Zidane told me he'd been kidnapped when they were in Burmecia."

His jaw dropped. "Master Vivi, kidnapped?! Who has done such a-" Garnet raised her hand as he started shouting, and his mouth snapped shut. "I apologize, Princess…"

"It's okay… The person who took him was the same who was responsible for what happened to my m- Queen Brahne."

"I see… Kuja, was it?"

The girl nodded. "But then Vivi showed up again, when I was with Zidane after Lindblum was attacked. But… something was wrong with him."

"Wrong?" he repeated. "Had he been hurt?"

She shook her head uncertainly. "I'm still not really sure what was wrong. But he was acting so different... I didn't know how to help him. He was… he was almost acting like those Black Waltzes we had to fight…" She left out the part about him killing the guard, though rather doubtfully.

"A Black Waltz…? Well, what happened then?" he pressed on. "Why isn't he here now?"

"When we decided to look for Kuja at the Outer Continent, Zidane insisted we take Vivi too. And when we found Kuja… he just took Vivi again. And now we don't know where he is." She finished quietly. She wondered then, why was it she seemed to be losing so many people close to her lately.

"Master Vivi is one of the strongest people I know." Steiner said confidently. "Where ever he is, I'm sure he's fine, and I'm sure that once things are settled we can begin a search immediately!" He looked confused for a moment. "But… Why would he want to kidnap Master Vivi?" he wondered, and they both turned suddenly as the door opened and a short, long-nosed figure walked in.

"O-Oh, what is happening here?" Dr. Tot asked, his eyes almost hidden behind his thick glasses. "Princess, it's time to get changed…. General Beatrix, will you help her?"

As the female general entered, Garnet leaned closer to Steiner for a moment. "I can probably explain more if you want… But…" She paused, biting her lower lip. "In case you do see Vivi, I need you to be careful. He… he may not be the same as before."

Utterly confused by this warning, Steiner tried to voice his doubts, but he was asked to leave while she got changed. The knight left the room, deciding to go patrol the castle while he waited. He thought about what Garnet had said… Why would he need to use caution around Vivi? He shook his head. It was a ridiculous idea, Master Vivi would never hurt anyone…

* * *

Vivi leaned out over the short wall at side of the ship, both his hands resting on the rim and his wings kept close to his body. He stared out at the rapidly setting sun as it set the ocean and surrounding clouds ablaze with shades of red and orange. He could make out the dark mass of the Mist continent in front of the ship and nothing but seemingly endless ocean below and behind.

He was almost enjoying being on the airship. Being up high wasn't nearly as frightening as he remember it being… The little mage reminded himself that eventually he had to try using his own wings to fly. He wasn't sure if or when he'd get the chance, but he didn't want them to just go to waste.

When he got on the deck at first, he'd tried speaking with some of the black mages up there. But… they hadn't answered. Unnerved by this, he'd kept at it until finally No. 44 had hissed in a barely audible voice that they'd tried talking to each other earlier, but Kuja had gotten angry and told them not to speak…

Vivi wasn't sure what to think of this, but Kuja was in charge, he really couldn't question it. It would be a small price for the mages to pay, though, considering what they would be getting.

Something else still bothered him. _Why _were they going to Alexandria? Kuja wouldn't just go to watch some ceremony, and as usual his true motives were unclear. It was starting to get on Vivi's nerves… He supposed he could try asking, but getting a clear answer out a Kuja was nigh impossible. For the time being, he decided to just relax.

Languidly he put one hand out in front of him, over the railing. Palm facing up, several tiny threads of electricity danced around his fingers, eventually gathering into a larger mass at the center. Vivi smiled a bit; it had been a while since he'd used any magic. He couldn't let that go to waste, either…

"Bored, are we?" came Kuja's voice, sounding oddly gentle, to his left. Vivi lost his concentration, the magic fading into nothing. "I'm sure you won't be for long."

Vivi only gave him a sideways glance before resuming his vigil over the side of the airship. "…Why am I here?"

He didn't know where the question had come from, or why he'd asked it.

Kuja looked surprised. "What… do you mean? I made you, and you serve me…"

…_That's not an answer…_

"Why aren't I doing anything then… like the other black mages?" he asked, a little more confident.

"What, you want to do all the menial labor?" The silver haired man laughed lightly, shaking his head. "Let's just say I have my reasons for having you here. And, I suppose you could say… I'm keeping you around for a 'special occasion.'" And with that he sauntered off to the other side of the ship, but then hesitated, and looked back over his shoulder. "But, if you'd really like something to do right now… Go tell your little friends in the engine room to increase the engine's power; we need to elevate the ship to get over the mountains." 

"Right…" Vivi walked back over to the hatch. He had no idea what Kuja had meant by everything before that… but maybe he was right. Maybe it was all a simple as he'd said. 

Besides, it was certainly easier to think of it that way.

* * *

The _Hilda Garde _landed slowly on the Alexandrian plateau, the bulky airship coming to a rest a short distance from the east section of the city. A ramp came down from one side to the ground, and Kuja appeared at the top of it. He turned to the mages on the bridge.

"You'll all stay here until I get back," he proclaimed, watching to make sure they were all listening. "Until then… Don't. Touch. Anything." The mages nodded hastily, and Kuja made his way down the ramp.

"Kuja!"

The man turned slightly and saw Vivi on the ramp. "What?"

"…I want to go too," he said determinedly.

He smirked, turned around and continued walking down the ramp until he was at the bottom. "Any particular reason why?" he then asked the mage behind him.

Vivi glowered indignantly, raising his wings behind him. "I have my own reasons, too."

He laughed. "Good enough. I was going to let you anyway, though. Though, for future reference, it's 'master' Kuja to you… Show some respect, puppet," he added, "Anyway, you'll probably enjoy the little show I'm going to-" He cut off, and there was a long pause, followed by a groan. "Oh no, not them…"

_Them…?_

The little mage tilted his head in confusion, and then spotted two small figures in the darkness, heading towards the airship.

"It's Kuja!"

"Kuja, it is!"

Vivi wasn't all that sure what they were at first. They were short, about as tall as Vivi it seemed, and wearing almost identical jester outfits, except one was dressed in blue and the other in pink. And they appeared quite happy to see Kuja. He didn't feel quite the same

"What are you two doing here?" he snapped, causing them to cringe slightly.

"W-we found out Queen Brahne was dead, but then we were banished from the castle!" the jester in blue exclaimed.

"No where to go, have we!" the one in pink added.

"Yes, and what do you want me to do about that?"

"Let us work for you!" the one in blue pleaded.

"Do anything you say, we will!"

Kuja gritted his teeth, but maintained his composure. "I… suppose I might have some use for you two… Oh, fine. Just don't bother me with stupid things…"

The jesters beamed. "Thank you!" they said in unison.

"Whatever…" Kuja muttered, putting a hand to his temple. "Just wait on the airship or something. You can keep an eye on the black mages."

At that point, Vivi finally came down the ramp to stand next to Kuja. The two jesters gave him odd looks, but he ignored them, instead tugging on one of Kuja's long sleeves.

"Who the hell are they?" he asked when Kuja looked down at him.

"Zorn, and Thorn." He gestured to each, and then looked back at them, smiling. "And, no doubt you two remember Vivi here, correct?"

They both exchanged glances and regarded the winged mage for a moment. Zorn's eyes went wide. "That's… that's the prototype!"

"Very good." Kuja remarked sarcastically. "The _same_ prototype you two lost. Isn't it lucky that I found him again?"

"S-said you didn't care about it, you did." Thorn said, to be glared at by Kuja.

"Shut up. I found I was mistaken… Anyway, you two wait on the airship. We shouldn't be long."

Zorn and Thorn nodded, and went past them onto the _Hilda Garde. _ Kuja started for the city, and Vivi quickly followed.

_…What weird people…_

* * *

Vivi still remembered entering the great city that many months ago. He'd even used the same entrance, and arrived in the same courtyard as the one he and Kuja were entering. Only now at night, though the darkness was held at bay by the dozens of lights coming from the houses around them. It was a mostly clear night, and looking up Vivi could see thousands of stars overhead, as well as the two moons, all of which further lighted the scene.

Kuja circled around the statue at the plaza's center, leaning against the stone base to stare up at the distant castle. The sword-like monolith at its center reflected all the light around it, glowing brightly. The night was calm, tranquil…

Vivi yawned, leaning against the left side of the statue. If Kuja was planning something, he was obviously waiting for the right moment. He turned slightly, his mouth opening to ask if they were waiting for something, but Kuja spoke first. Not to Vivi though, but the little mage doubted Kuja cared if he heard him…

"Peace is but a shadow of death, desperate to forget it's painful past…" he said in a hushed voice. "Though we hope for promising years, after shedding a thousand tears, yesterday's sorrow constantly nears." He stood forward, walking away from the statue. "And while the moon still shines blue, by dawn it will turn to scarlet hue…"

Vivi blinked a few times, also moving away from the statue. Where had that come from…? It kind of sounded like a poem, a rather nice one, and the words did make sense if one thought about them…

"…Did you just come up with that?" the mage asked on impulse. Kuja turned slightly, but apparently decided to ignore the question.

"It is an auspicious day for Alexandria," he said, glancing over at him. "Garnet's ascension to the throne has brought hope and peace to the kingdom."

_Garnet… I wonder where she is…_

"The people are overjoyed," he continued, "they believe a wonderful future is ahead of them." And he paused, a slow, sadistic smile spreading over his face. "…But the celebration isn't over yet. It's time to really light things up!" His voice rising, he threw his arms above him. "Your former master is here, Bahamut. Play a requiem for her and all of Alexandria!"

Vivi felt it… magic, power, a frightening power that he'd felt once before. He sensed the arcane energy gathering and looked up in time to see a flare of light and fire as something huge and dark materialized in the air over Alexandria.

Bahamut was every bit as awe-inspiring and terrifying as it had been the last time he'd seen it, when Kuja had taken him away at the Iifa Tree. The dragon roared, the sound reverberating in Vivi's skull… and it proceeded to launch several devastating fireballs onto the city below. The fireballs went right through the buildings below, digging furrows into the rows of houses and sending tiles and burning wood flying in all directions. The inhabitants were no doubt killed instantly, and anyone who had been sleeping was also no doubt wide-awake, wondering what the sudden commotion was.

Vivi's eyes were wide, staring at the destruction Bahamut was causing… that technically, Kuja was causing. A thought struck him, one he couldn't quite shake…

_If… if Kuja has _that_… Why on Gaia does he need me??_

His creator lowered his arms, watching with smug satisfaction as the dragon king wreaked havoc on the city. He imagined Garnet watching, unable to do anything, and smiled. There was something she could do, and that something was precisely why he was there. This was what he'd been waiting for…

On a sudden inclination, silvery villain cast another spell, a summon of sorts. Within several moments, huge, gray spiked worms, Mistodons, flooded into the city to take care of any townspeople who tried to flee.

"Wonderful, isn't it?" Kuja asked the small form to his left. Vivi nodded shakily.

"Y-yeah…" He tilted his hat up to look at Bahamut again. It would probably level the city in only a few minutes… How could _anything_ possibly stand up to that?

"I'm aiming for something more powerful than even that." Kuja said, also looking at the dragon. "I've been striving toward this goal for years. And it's almost within my reach…"

Vivi frowned slightly, looking over at the castle. If all Kuja was going to do was gloat, he didn't really care to listen. Though apparently, Kuja didn't care.

"I truly hope nothing is bothering you…" His voice was closer now, and almost sounded sarcastic. He saw Kuja had walked next to him, and Vivi just regarded him with a puzzled look.

"Kuj- Master Kuja…" He caught himself, the words feeling odd in his mouth. "I don't understand. I know why I'm here, but-"

"Hmm?" Kuja interjected, raising an eyebrow. "Really. Why are you here, then?"

Vivi looked at him skeptically. "I'm a weapon… I exist to kill. It's what you showed me was true."

"Yes, that's right… So, what's the problem, then?"

"…I don't see… why you wanted to have me around as a weapon, when you could have gotten that… Bahamut _thing_ to do the job, and a hell of a lot easier," Vivi said, feeling oddly tense as he pointed up at the still-rampaging Bahamut.

For a moment, Kuja's expression slipped, and he looked surprised. Vivi hardly caught it, but he did notice something a bit… off... But after another moment he laughed. "What, feeling left out, my little toy?"

Vivi narrowed his eyes, their color shifting slightly. "I want to know. It doesn't make any sense!"

Now Kuja was beginning to look irritated. "And I thought I explained this… My reasons are my own concern. Not yours." His expression softened to amusement. "Now that I think about it… You really wouldn't get it, would you? But it doesn't matter… I'm sure I'll have some use for you later, but Bahamut really is better suited for this, don't you think?"

"…"

"But, since you seem _so_ very eager…" His eyes were mischievous. "Why don't you see if any of your… 'friends' are in the city? I'm sure you'd like to meet up with them again, right? That monkey boy and the rest of his little gang?"

Vivi's head shot up in surprise, his eyes paling once more.

_What… what is he _talking _about??_

Kuja grinned, kneeling down to Vivi's height. "You told me you know why you were here… Go do it, then. Consider it an order, if that works. Go wreak as much havoc in this city as you please… Do whatever it takes. Burn, destroy, kill anyone who crosses you…"

Vivi looked confused, tilting his head to one side quizzically.

_Destroy… Kill everyone…_

-no no not that please no-

He shook his head rapidly, but without knowing why he was doing it. He wanted to do what Kuja asked, he had to, he-

__

"It really isn't very hard," Kuja mused, tilting his head slightly as he regarded the mage. "The Black Waltzes embraced their purpose… It was the most important thing in the world to them. Why do _you_ have to be so difficult?"

__

…I don't understand I thought I had I thought I had accepted it…

He wanted to though, he found himself wanting nothing more than to do what Kuja wanted him to do… Something kept him from thinking that way. He couldn't see exactly what it was however, like a picture that was out of focus…

"Maybe you're broken for good," he finished, standing up.

_I'm not…_

"I'll go," Vivi said firmly. "I'm not broken anymore…"

Kuja folded his arms over his chest, looking over at the castle. "I'm glad to hear it." He grinned, looking back over, and waving his hand in a shooing motion. "Then go do it. I'd like to know that all the trouble I spent on you wasn't for nothing."

Vivi nodded quickly and turned, nearly tripping over his own feet in the process. After pausing once to adjust his hat he walked to the only street leading further into the city. Kuja shook his head, putting his hand over his face.

"He could probably cause more damage by accident than by actually trying…" He glanced over his shoulder at the mage. He didn't have much patience left. This wasn't supposed to be so difficult… But this would be the last test. Even if Kuja's plan succeeded, he couldn't afford to have any liabilities…

The mage had better get something right for once.

* * *

Vivi walked down the narrow street, passing by several buildings he recognized.

_Havoc… I can do that, right? Right… It's easy. It's what I was made to do…_

The mage looked down the street, empty except for a piece of burning debris here and there. He saw lights in nearby windows come on, as people inside were undoubtedly awake now. Almost without thinking, Vivi raised his hands out, palms in, and began chanting a spell…

_Destroy…_

The air in front of Vivi grew hotter, almost burning as little wisps of flame started to materialize around his hands. He didn't anything feel more than a bit of warmth, however. He had full control over this fire.

_Kill everyone…_

The flames grew stronger, brighter, condensing in between of his outstretched palms. He was adding a little extra 'fuel' to this fire, so to speak. He finally readied himself to send the contained inferno forward…

__

The fireball rocketed straight through the nearest lighted window, going straight through and shattering glass and destroying a large portion of the surrounding wall in the process. Once inside the spell spread, consuming everything within. Vivi had to shield his eyes at the sudden increase in brightness. He finally stood back and watched, feeling strangely apathetic for a moment.

Vivi could swear he could feel his heart pounding in his chest. He wasn't sure if he was excited or afraid. Maybe it was both.

Using the spell had been… exhilarating. But he didn't know why he'd done it. He hadn't even thought about it, he just…

_It doesn't matter… And that was fun, wasn't it?_

I was made to destroy, I exist only to kill. Nothing else matters.

He heard another window shatter, and saw a burning figure leap out, tumbling onto the cobblestones. The person rolled frantically, beating out the flames. They were lucky, and only their clothes seemed a little singed. It appeared to be a young man, and he stood up shakily, looking back at the burning houses.

__

The man looked around, still in shock. If he saw Vivi walking towards him, he didn't respond in any way. He finally looked down and saw the little mage, his expression even more bewildered. Then he looked up, and cried out as he suddenly jumped back. Vivi did the same, just as a Mistodon slithered past, having spotted a couple of people fleeing down the street.

"What the hell is going on?!" the man finally shouted.

It was the last thing he ever said. Vivi looked over at him to see the man suddenly go still, his face pale. He coughed, more a wet bubbling sound than anything, and blood flowed from his mouth. Vivi was puzzled, until he saw three long, sharp spikes protruding from the man's chest…

The Mistodon behind the man screeched, tossing the body off its claws to one side. It paused, the lights on its head flashed in rapid succession as it looked down at Vivi. The creature almost seemed like it didn't know what to do about him, but something told it not to attack.

Tilting his head curiously, and completely without apprehension, Vivi approached the monster, which only blinked the lights on its face at him. Otherwise it seemed pretty content to stay there for the moment. A sudden, rash idea seized the little mage, and with hardly another thought he hopped onto some nearby rubble, wings flapping rapidly to help keep his balance. With another leap, he landed on the Mistodon's back, standing precariously on the one thick spine that extended behind it before he grabbed onto one of the others jutting from its pointed head.

The creature twitched slightly, but it paid no heed to the passenger on its back, if it even noticed the slight weight at all. Pulling itself away from the rubble, it moved on down the debris-strewn street. Vivi held onto the spikes, looking around to see if he saw anyone.

_Well, this certainly beats walking…_

Vivi smiled. It was kind of fun, he had to admit. At least Kuja was having him do something. He felt a little better…

Then he tilted his head slightly, confused again. He'd just seen a human die, right in front of him. Rather messily, at that.

_Why should that bother me?_

-It's wrong it's wrong gods it's wrong-

Anyway, who am I looking for? Zidane…? Wouldn't he be at the castle, though?

The monster jerked beneath him suddenly, speeding forth as it apparently found another victim to tear apart. Vivi looked ahead of it to see several more of the creatures gathered around two figures. He saw the light from fires on the buildings around them glint on steel. A second later, there was a terrible screech, the death cry of a Mistodon. But as one went down, two more replaced it.

'His' Mistodon scuttled forward more cautiously, at least Vivi thought that may be why it was slowing down. He wasn't sure if it had even noticed the death of one of its brethren… But as it approached, he finally was able to see the two people valiantly fighting the monsters.

A huge man wearing old, dented metal armor shouted a warning to the other, a woman with brown hair and a patch over one eye. They were working as a team, both of them tearing through the creatures with powerful sword techniques, while the woman occasionally used healing spells.

Vivi's eyes went wide as he instantly recognized the two. Steiner and General Beatrix.

_I haven't seen Steiner since… since the festival in Lindblum…_

I saw Beatrix in… in Burmecia…

Instead of feeling happy at seeing one of his friends again, he found his thoughts leaning more towards the other knight, triggered by the memories from the destroyed city. He cringed slightly, remembering how easily she'd beaten them, leaving them battered and near unconscious on the wet stone floor of the castle… He doubted they'd harmed her in the least.

None of his thoughts about the manner were pleasant ones.

_Kill her._

He didn't really need to think about it beyond that. He had no qualms about doing so…

Vivi leapt from the Mistodon's back, flapping his wings to control his fall. It moved away from him, and he waited until he got a good shot at the female general.

The creatures continued to come at the two fighters, but each was dispatched with relative ease. Finally, there was a lull and Vivi saw his chance. He started chanting--

"Master Vivi?!"

--and his concentration was quickly cut off by the sudden exclamation from Steiner. He heard the clanging of his armor before he looked over and saw him approaching. Beatrix also looked back from where she had been scanning further down the road.

"Master Vivi, is that you?" he said, though still tired from fighting. "I don't believe-"

He was cut off as well, but this time from a small rocket of fire that flashed by, narrowly missing his head. The big knight stopped dead in his tracks, his mouth help open in shock.

Vivi lowered his hand, a few leftover tendrils of flame still rising from it. "Stay out of my way, Steiner." He said, his voice hard. "I have things I need to do…"

Steiner was utterly baffled. Maybe it _wasn't_ Master Vivi…? He finally noticed the wings, feathers shining with light from the fires. Just like one of the Black Waltzes... But it _still _looked like him! Who else could it be??

Vivi turned then, his now red-gold eyes trained on Beatrix who was looking back at him warily, her sword ready. She also remembered fighting the mage, and knew perfectly well that he was capable of using potentially lethal magic. She didn't know why he'd suddenly shown up, or why he had wings now, but her instincts told her something was wrong.

She was right. There was a flash of light coming from the mage, and she dodged to one side just as another, larger ball of fire shot past her, grazing her side. Ignoring the burn she leapt again, as a pillar of flame rose right where she'd been standing.

"Master Vivi, stop!" Steiner shouted, misunderstanding the situation all together. He thought that maybe Vivi just didn't know Beatrix was on their side now. He ran over, and since he didn't want to hurt the small mage, he grabbed him by the shoulders, lifting him up easily. "Vivi, Beatrix isn't our enemy anymore! Please stop!"

The response he got wasn't nearly what he'd expected. There was a half-snarling protest from Vivi, and Steiner dropped him as he was hit in the face by one of the wings. He stumbled back, wincing and looking shocked at the black mage in front of him.

"I said _stay out of my way_!" Vivi cried angrily, though there was the oddest pleading note in his voice. Ignoring him, he turned back to Beatrix, readying another spell…

He barely registered the movement and flash of light and steel before she was there, the Save the Queen slashing. The blade didn't hit him, but the sword technique did. It was the same one she'd used at the end of the last battle he'd been in against her. There was a surge of blue, electric energy all around him, a terribly painful blast that lifted him off the ground and sent blue-black feathers flying. It only lasted a few seconds, but it was more than enough to send the mage falling to his hands and knees, hardly able to even hold that position…

__

…hurts…

He cringed, falling further. He coughed twice, the action bringing about an agonizing pain in his chest, and he saw blood, his blood, fall onto his hands…

_I have to get up I can't fail I-_

Vivi managed to look up and saw the end of Beatrix' sword directly in front of his face, the woman glaring down at him with her one good eye. Was she going to finish him off…?

"Beatrix, wait!" Steiner finally spoke up, moving forward. "This is all a misunderstanding! Master Vivi is a friend of mine, and he must have mistook you for an enemy."

She regarded him with a speculative look, before looking back down at the fallen mage. "Are you sure?"

"Of course I'm sure!" he insisted, but then remembered what Princess Garnet had said. Was this what she'd meant…?

She looked back over at him for a minute. "Something doesn't seem right to me…"

Though it hurt to even move, Vivi managed to shoot his hand out, grabbing onto the sword. Not enough to cut himself, but enough for what he wanted to do… Blue forks of electricity shot from his hand onto the sword, conducting easily up the metal. Beatrix pulled her sword away quickly, but the lightning magic still came, reaching her arm and causing her to lose all control of it. She nearly dropped her sword, but was able to move away before she could be affected anymore.

"Steiner, move away from him! Now!" she commanded, switching her sword to the other arm and trying to get normal feeling back into the other. She _hated_ thunder magic…

"I-I…" He looked quickly between her and Vivi, at a loss for words and what to do. Vivi wasn't moving at all, and naturally this worried him. He couldn't figure out why he was trying to attack Beatrix, though.

"He's on their side! He's an enemy, get away from him!" Beatrix said again, louder. "We still have to defend Alexandria!"

He still couldn't accept that, though he did move away. Something did seem to be wrong with Vivi. Maybe he was confused or something…

"We cannot leave him here." Steiner protested. "He could be in danger if--"

"I'm sorry, but we can't. Now we need to hurry!" she said, looking as two more Mistodons moved towards them. "More are coming!"

Steiner raised his sword, moving to a battle position.

"Steiner…"

He looked quickly back at Vivi to see that the mage had managed to pull himself up slightly.

"P-please help me…" he said, his eyes back to a soft amber color. Steiner hesitated, but he couldn't just let him lie there. He could get him out of harms way at least…

"Hold on!" he called to Beatrix, more than a little guiltily. He could help Vivi before anymore Mistodons came. At least the mage seemed to be back to normal… He rushed over to the little mage, kneeling and putting one big hand out to help him up. Vivi looked up a little, his eyes a strange color, and grabbed onto his hand.

"…I'm sorry…"

"What…? Why are you sorry?" he asked, brow furrowed in confusion. Nothing was making sense… But then it really didn't matter as the spell hit him a second later. It wasn't fire or lightning, or any other element, but it was still rather painful as the spell almost literally drew the life from him, transferring it to Vivi and healing the wounds Beatrix had inflicted. He jerked away, only slightly weakened from the spell. Vivi was almost fully healed, and was finally able to stand, his wings flaring behind him as he regarded the man with an odd look.

"You really don't know anything, do you…" the mage said coldly. "Just let me do what I have to. It'll be better for both of us." He looked over at Beatrix, who was slicing through the attacking Mistodons with little difficulty. Steiner was at a complete loss. Why was Vivi doing this? What was he supposed to do?! He… he couldn't just attack the young mage… Could he?

Steiner raised his sword. He would knock Vivi out with the flat of the blade. He couldn't bring himself to injure him badly, let alone kill him… No matter what he was trying to do.

"Steiner…" Vivi said quietly, the pleading tone returning… "Stop."

And he did. Literally, as the magic froze time for the knight, putting whatever else he'd wanted to say on hold until the spell wore off. Vivi saw Beatrix was distracted, and began focusing his magic energy. He could do so and greatly increase the damage a spell could do, but it took time. 

He remembered vaguely then, how during many of their battles against stronger foes, Zidane and the others always made sure he was safe while preparing to cast spells... Steiner would even take hits for him, protecting the frail little mage, until he finally was able to take out whatever evil they were facing in a spectacular display of fire or whatever spell he'd chosen.

Suddenly the Mistodons moved away from the female knight, apparently more interested in prey that didn't fight back. Beatrix, breathing hard from the battle, looked quickly over at them, finally seeing the state Steiner was in. Her eyes narrowed an in an instant she charged forward. It was unlikely the mage would survive her next attack… 

But Vivi had expected it, and began by leaping up, his wings beating furiously. She stopped at the last second as he flew upwards, out of her reach. He got up to the surrounding roofs, though he had a bad feeling he's strained something doing so… But at least now he had the advantage. He was going to need it…

Beatrix looked quickly for a way to reach the mage, but there was nothing short of jumping up there herself. She only had one long-distance spell in her collection of skills, but it was also her strongest and most draining on her magic powers. She'd needed to heal Steiner first, though.

A lower level spell would do fine, Vivi had decided. Beatrix had turned her attention to Steiner, trying to heal him. She didn't notice as an odd, sickly yellow-greenish bubble began forming in the air above her, floating there almost harmlessly. Vivi held it there for a moment, waiting…

Beatrix growled in frustration; she couldn't remove the time magic at first. A few more tries should do it… Then, cursing herself, she looked back up at the roof, at the silhouette of the winged mage there.

Vivi grinned… and with a wave of his hand the bubble burst open and a deluge of toxic liquid fell onto the knight, burning and seeping into her exposed skin. She shouted in surprise and pain, jumping back and trying futilely to rub it off. The magic-induced poison crept into her system, spreading until her body felt like it was on fire…

Antidote! Her mind screamed through the initial panic. She had the magic that would purge it from her, but the mage wasn't going to give her the chance, she found out as she leapt to one side, dodging several large daggers of ice. Thinking quickly she ducked into a roll, ending up behind a pile of timber and other debris. The spell would only take a moment-

Blazing red-gold eyes narrowed with concentration, Vivi ran along the top of the roof, trying to get a good shot before she could heal herself and retaliate. A globe of electricity crackled brightly in his hands, little bolts escaping on occasion to burn zigzagging trails along the tiled roof. Spotting her again he unleashed it, feeling triumphant when he heard a startled shriek, which faded as soon as a white glow surrounded the knight.

_White magic! Damn it, I forgot!_

His anger rising, he focused yet again. It would take one massive spell to take care of her…

…_I exist only to kill…_

Off by the wall, Steiner's limbs began moving agonizingly slowing as the magic began to wear off. He had to help Beatrix…!

The poison gone, Beatrix began chanting another spell, even as Vivi charged up for his.

Vivi raised his hands, little glowing specks of visible magic dancing around him.

_I exist only to kill._

Beatrix raised her sword defensively, her body tensed to spring away if the mage cast first. She was nearly ready, the blue/white light around her increasing in brightness. She saw something out of the corner of her eye. More Mistodons, probably. Hopefully they'd keep back for a few more seconds…

__

I exist only to kill!!

The spells launched almost simultaneously. Vivi's eyes flashed almost white as a surge of flame flew up from his hands, swirling in a maelstrom in front of him. There was an equally bright light by Beatrix, dozens of blue trails of light shooting out from around her, whirling in a haphazard dance before heading in different pathways towards the mage. Black and white magic collided halfway in a tremendous explosion of light and heat, and both of them had to shield their eyes for an instant.

When Vivi opened his, he was immediately struck by several of the swirling blue lights, throwing him back and nearly off the other side of the roof. He grabbed onto a chimney nearby, trying without much luck to shield himself from the spell. He found that the effect had been diminished considerably after going through his charged-up spell. The spell which continued down… straight onto the startled general. She was pushed back hard by the sheer force of it, crashing into an already weakened wall behind her and going right through in a shower of embers and falling building.

"BEATRIX!!" came Steiner's booming voice as the time magic finally wore off. All else forgotten, he ran over to the already burning building, not even hesitating to run inside the broken wall, even though the fire was spreading quickly.

Vivi watched from his perch on the rooftop, almost collapsing from the sudden exhaustion that seized him. It always happened when he used big spells like that… But at least he'd finally got her.

Smiling, and feeling oddly proud of himself, he walked back along the roofs to the square they'd arrive in. If he noticed the faint sounds of Steiner calling for Beatrix behind him, he didn't show it.

_Steiner can be such a fool… But he wouldn't know what happened, would he?_

__

He wandered along the peak of the roof as he had with Puck when they had gone to see the play. He'd come back to the square, and saw Kuja still by the statue.

_I should tell him I did what he told me to..._

With that thought Vivi spread his wings to jump down, but he suddenly became aware of a very bright light behind him, covering the entire city in a blue-white glow. Moments later he felt a very strong source of magic and he whirled around, eyes going wide as he saw some_thing_ towering over Alexandria castle.

It was enormous, bigger than even Bahamut. Though it was difficult to see from the distance, it almost looked like a castle itself… Except this castle had wings. Four pairs of luminous white wings arched behind the strange being, silhouetted against the night sky.

_What… is…?_

He heard Bahamut roar, and saw the dragon fly down towards the newcomer, launching destructive blasts of energy from it's mouth. But the wings descended over the castle and the city, and the blasts dissipated harmlessly.

Vivi watched transfixed as Bahamut, enraged, tried attacking again. But this time, the castle's protector used it's own attack. From around it, thousands of blue laser-like tendrils shot out towards it, a massive version of the Holy spell Beatrix had used on him. Realizing the danger the dragon tried flying away, but the energy circled around it from all sides, hitting it repeatedly… and finally there was an explosion that engulfed it in a ball of dark energy, which dissipated moments later into thin filaments of light. Bahamut was gone.

_Is… is it dead?!_

Shocked, Vivi jumped off the roof, nearly stumbling in his haste. He stopped a few feet from Kuja, surprised to see that the man really didn't look all that upset with having Bahamut defeated.

Vivi gave him a questioning look when Kuja glanced down at him. Kuja looked back up at the winged being over the castle.

"It's so beautiful… Alexander, the legendary Eidolon." He said in a hushed voice. Vivi stood back to the side of the statue, looking up at what he guessed was 'Alexander'. "So, you wish to defend the castle with your brilliant wings? How admirable. Your powers transcend even Bahamut's… Alexander, I've been waiting for you."

__

Vivi leaned against the stature, wondering what would happen next. Something interesting always seemed to be happening lately…

Kuja continued, "I've called a magic carriage for you. I'm sure you like it… Invincible, come forth! You're mine, Alexander!"

He'd had barely finished speaking as a beam of blue light shot down onto Alexander from the rapidly gathering, tumultuous clouds overhead. The night sky was all but blocked, as an ominous whirl of dark clouds appeared, a gigantic, red eye at the center.

Immediately Alexander's many wings moved over the castle and city protectively, the rush of air as he did so heard even from that distance. Vivi tensed, knowing what would happen. He'd seen what had happened to Bahamut back at the Iifa Tree. He understood what was happening now, why Kuja had come to Alexandria.

_Why does he need this sort of power…? What is he trying to do??_

A few moments passed, a minute… 

And nothing happened. The eye just hung suspended over the castle, unmoving, as was everything else. Something was wrong, Vivi felt, and his suspicions were more or less confirmed when he looked over and saw Kuja's startled expression.

"What happened to the Invincible?! Enslave Alexander, as you have Bahamut!" he exclaimed, his voice manic. Then his eyes went wide, and if he could become any paler… "Could it be… Garland? Impossible! Why would he come to Gaia?!" He paused, trying to calm down. "If it is indeed Garland, then he must know of my plan! But, why has he assumed control of the Invincible…?"

Kuja took a step back, staring up at the castle and the Invincible. "No! He can't be…"

"What? What's happening??" Vivi finally asked, running up next to the pale man. He was shaking his head, appearing at a complete loss. "What's going on?"

"None of your concern," came the terse reply.

He'd expected as much, but Vivi persisted. "Why can't you enslave Alexander? Is… is there anything I can do?"

Kuja was ignoring him now, trying to regain control of the Invincible. Vivi had no idea what the Invincible was, but Kuja wasn't going to answer him…

He cringed as another beam shot down from the eye onto Alexander, and this time the Eidolon reared back as if in pain. Vivi could barely see from the distance, but it looked like the castle was coming apart, pieces of the four towers crumbling off…

"He's going to destroy it… He can't…" Kuja whispered, almost inaudibly. "Not after all I've done!!"

The man sounded so desperate, Vivi almost felt sorry for him… But he found it difficult to feel that way. Maybe this was just supposed to turn out this way.

Only a few moments after the second beam, there came a third. Only this one was the last, and most destructive. There was an enormous explosion over the castle, and it looked as if Alexander was completely incinerated in the blast.

The thing that caught Vivi's eye was that the explosion didn't stop… It spread, the shockwave tearing through the city around the castle, sending fire and debris in a widening circumference-

-_Oh god-_

He spun around, breaking into a run. Maybe if he could get out of the city, he could at least avoid being crushed by anything.

The effort was futile, however, as the edge of the blast reached the square within seconds. Vivi was thrown forward in an intense wave of energy, and an instant later thrown against a group of barrels next to one of the city's walls. He struck his head hard against one of them, and the last thing he saw before blacking out was an image the entire city in flames…

**Author's Note 2: **Yeah, Vivi gets knocked out again. =P Hey, if the blast hurt Kuja as much as the game said, then it woulda' hurt our poor lil' mage a lot more... Well, I dunno if I got every point across that I wanted, but good enough. ^_^ Tell me if anything is confusing, so I can explain it to ya better! =)


End file.
